It appears you have not yet Signed Up with our community. To Sign Up for free, please click here....



Teen Health Message Board
Post New Thread   Closed Thread
LinkBack Thread Tools
Old 08-04-2003, 01:09 PM   #1
Senior Veteran
(male)
 
Join Date: Sep 2001
Posts: 784
Andrew29 HB User
Post Hate Myself

Hey, I just turned 19 a few days ago. Realized that I really hate myself and my life. I really wish I had a different life. I'm not saying I'm an evil person or am an a**hole. I'm actually a nice guy. But there are so many things that I wish were different but have no control over it. First, I have suffered from acne for 6 long years, and have been on plenty of medications (including the strongest one, Accutane) with no success. Acne has really made my life depressing.

Another thing, which some of you probably won't see as a problem is that I have a slight allergy to alcohol. I'm popular enough that people will always invite me to parties to drink and whatnot. But I can't, and absolutely hate it! Of all things, I have to be allergic to alcohol. I hate it. There are lots of days when I wish I was much less popular and didn't have the invite to these parties. I always go because the people there have been my friends for years & years. I'm not goin to avoid them. But I always end up going, not drinking, and just getting depressed because everyone is having so much fun except for me. Like, I actually DON'T LIKE the weekend.

My relationship with the opposite sex is also terrible (probably cause of my looks). I can't even talk to girls. I look through my cell phone list, and I have like 5 girls on there. I've noticed this year that a lot of guys are just goin out with girls for sex, where I am actually interested in a relationship and treating a girl right, but I can't get a date. Nothing in my life ever seems to workout in my favour...



[This message has been edited by Andrew29 (edited 08-04-2003).]

 
Sponsors Lightbulb
   
Old 08-04-2003, 01:23 PM   #2
Member
 
Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: USA
Posts: 77
bngreen HB User
Post

It's good to let things out.
However, I don't think you have much to complain about. You are whining more than anything else. I don't feel sorry for you.
I am not trying to be harsh, just honest. You most likely haven't lived outside your parents/guardians home very long to have much of a real life to hate. Take what you are given and run with it. Be grateful you aren't here today complaining about credit card debt or passed due payments.
Acne and an allergy are not reasons to hate your life.
I know this is probably not the response you were looking for. I appologize if I came off too harsh.

 
Old 08-04-2003, 02:36 PM   #3
Senior Veteran
(male)
 
Join Date: Sep 2001
Posts: 784
Andrew29 HB User
Post

Bngreen, your response was fine. But I feel I should add a few things. Overdue payments are definetly problems but they are CONTROLABLE things. You have to look at why they are overdue..is expenditure more than a persons income, etc.. I am expressing things in which I have no control over.

1)Acne is definetly something to hate your life over. And if you don't believ me, I urge you to head over to the Acne Forum and ask some people about some of their experiences about extremely low self-esteem and depression so low, that they've considered suicide.

2)This is not my life story. If it were, it would include things such as: abusive & racist & "money over love" parents, living with gastrointestinal and urinary problems in secrecy.

 
Old 08-04-2003, 02:50 PM   #4
Junior Member
 
Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: NOR*CAL
Posts: 14
abercrombieQT65 HB User
Wink

heyy u!
i dont have the acne..but dont let the little things stop ur life ur acne will get better and as it does u will get self confidence..thats leads to talking to girls..and the alcohol thing..u will start to understand as u get older (even though im younger than u lol)...that drinking isnt the only way to have a good time and when u get older the partys r less focused on drinking its just the age u r at in ur life..DONT LOSE HOPE bc once u lost that u have lost everything... hope lets u go on with life..ive been through alot in my life..but im still here bc u have to have hope and patience ur gona b alrite buddy
*`AnDyLeI`*

 
Old 08-04-2003, 07:34 PM   #5
Junior Member
 
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Washington
Posts: 44
FirestormZero HB User
Post

Ok. Here is something you must realize. Getting girls is not about looking good. Looks help, but if you have self confidence, smooth talking skills, and are genuinely and passionately interested in girls than you will do well.

Ok. Acne sucks. Oh, well. You probably focus more on it than other people, so just relax about it.

Drinking is alright. I have no problem getting girls, and although I'm handsome now, I wasn't always handsome and I still did alright.

I don't go to parties to get drunk, I go to parties to meet people and make connections. Life is about making connections.

Now... you are at parties with a whole bunch of drunk girls. They should be your focus. Honestly, 1 or 2 beers would loosen you up a bit and make things easier, but if you find a way to relax on your own you can achieve the same effect without alchohol.

Get involved in other social activities. Join clubs. Go out and do things. The less time you spend sitting on your *** watching life pass you by the happier you will be. You are 19, you have so much ahead of you man.

Good huntin bruddah,
FirestormZero

 
Old 08-05-2003, 01:49 AM   #6
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Feb 2003
Posts: 194
Kylie1 HB User
Post

bngreen I think that was a little harsh, there is nothing worse than someone telling you your problems don't really matter. Your problems are real and they do matter, no matter how small they are.

Anyway, all these little problems aren't going to solve themselves so you have to work at that. I know it's hard because there can be so many and you just don't know where to start. So I have taken out my health studies booklet and I'm writing out this bit to help you on solving your problems I know it sounds dumb but it is a good way to ge in control of your probs so just a list for each problem

1. Define the problem (e.g. your acne)

2. What things could you do to solve the problem? (e.g. go to the doctor and get your acne checked out, sit on your bum and wait for the acne to go away etc.)

3. Consider the outcomes of each of these choices. (including disadvantages, advantages, risks, feelings, rewards)

4. Make a choice.

Now that little list isn't going to solve all your problems but it helps you take a little more control of your life I guess. In the end it's all up to you Okay I don't think I have ever put so much effort in to a response in my life :P

 
Old 08-05-2003, 10:04 PM   #7
Veteran
(male)
 
Join Date: May 2001
Location: Texas
Posts: 335
toaskornottoask HB User
Post

Andrew,
It sucks being a teenager sometimes doesn't it? There are things in life that are going to happen, and that you will not be happy with. There are things in likfe that happen that you will like, but you don't get to decide what happens and when it happens. When you are older, you will look back at yourself and remember how you felt, and think that you souldn't have felt that way, that things like this happen to everybody, and it is true. To start, acne is a natural thing. It happens to some people more than others, but I guarantee you, everyone will (if not already) have a time, maybe very short, in their life that they are extremely self conscious. It could be for big things, it could be for little things. I guarantee you that sometimes when you talk to people, they have something they are worried about, and are very self conscious, but are conveying themselves in a confident way, and doesn't that seem more appealing to you? You can't help the way you were made and the fact that acne has affected you more than maybe some others, so why worry about it? There will be a day when your acne will start to go away, and all will be better, but until then, why make your life miserable thinking about it? People honestly put more thought into their looks than another person does.

As for your alcohol problem, again, this is something that affects you and you can't help. MAYBE you could see a doctor and see if anything can be done, but that may be a long shot. You may as well get used to this too. You don't have to get drunk to have fun, if you are confident enough at parties to grab some attention, to talk to people you don't know, then your weekends will improve dramatically.

And as for your girl problem, like the other users said, confidence is a big draw for people of the opposite sex. I am sure you are a very friendly guy, but I have a feeling it's your lack of confidence that keeps you from going places with girls, or talking to new girls. This is something you should work on. If you can be confident, you can go up to new girls and make friends, or maybe even more.

I hope things work out for you,
toaskornottoask

 
Old 08-06-2003, 04:20 PM   #8
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Jun 2003
Location: TX
Posts: 130
jamie157 HB User
Post

listen to my story..

 
Old 08-06-2003, 09:15 PM   #9
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Aug 2003
Posts: 124
CrazyBoutLinkinPark HB User
Cool

First of all, Iím not a guy, and I donít have acne, I AM though allergic to alcohol. So although all my ďproblemsĒ arenít exactly like yours, I def know how you feel. When I was 9, I was beaten by someone I trusted and I had to wear leg braces like Forest Gump through 4th grade and the first half of high school (by the way, Iím a senior). I had two friends who commit suicide, and I was not popular at all freshman and sophomore year, I was shyÖ and when I say popular, I didnít even have one friend. Itís not that Iím a ******, I was just so self-conscious. I could never get a date with any guy (or talk to one for that matter) because I was way too young (13 year old sophomore) and I was shy as heckÖ and the forest gump braces werenít exactly guy magnets. But then, I dunno, sometime junior year, IÖ I donít want to say grew up, but I started not caring about what people thought about me. I became popular, and I got invited to parties, it was then I found out that I was allergic to alcohol. In a way, you kinda feel out of it if you donít drink, but Iím kinda happy that Iím allergic. It doesnít taste that great, I mean, it takes some getting used to, and there are a lot of cons that come with it.

Ok, second of all, the first thing a girl notices about a guy is looks, but the thing that leaves a lasting impression is confidence. You could be the ugliest guy on earth, but if youíre confident, youíll get a lot of girls. I think FirestormZero had a good point about drinking, you just have to get lose, and you donít really need alcohol to do that.
You gotta just enjoy life. I look back now at my terrible middle school and first two years of high school, and I realize how stupid and insignificant my problems were. Then, they were a big deal, but now, theyíre nothing. Trust me, try not to think about the bad things, try to focus on the good thingsÖ and you get a little self confidence, things will come around. No worries

 
Old 08-07-2003, 10:36 AM   #10
Junior Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2003
Location: GA
Posts: 40
monkey84 HB User
Post

Andrew~

I just turned 19 myself, but im not a guy. I've made a lot of changes in my life....especally the past year. One thing i've learned, life's always going to have those obstacles in the road...you can sit there and fear it or go and try to get over them. You cant control acne.... you've said you've tryed and you've been on ever kind of medicine, but what u can do its not let it control how u feel about yourself or ur life. As for the acohol allergy..... i know that has to suck. Especally in high school, no less college. But being that I have experiences with acohol....its not all that great. Yea, it helpes relaxe me and all that great stuff. But in the end of the night I feel like ish, and i've made some bad mistakes being intoxicated. And don;t (sorry i meant to say dont, not do) get so hard on yourself. Everyone goes through a little depression in their lifes. Just try to think about the postives....or go to a place around your area that you enjoy going too. I hope this helps!

[This message has been edited by monkey84 (edited 08-08-2003).]

 
Old 08-07-2003, 11:21 AM   #11
Veteran
 
Join Date: Apr 2003
Location: FL USA
Posts: 333
UF baby HB User
Post

people get themselves in debt. people don't do anything to deserve acne.

 
Old 08-07-2003, 04:46 PM   #12
Member
 
Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: USA
Posts: 77
bngreen HB User
Post

I am sorry.
Your problems seem like normal teenage problems. When I was your age, I was about to start my sophomore year in college. I went to school and worked full time. I had a car payment, rent and all bills in my name. However, I had better credit than most people I knew (including my parents).
I compared my life to yours. I should not have done that. To me, your problems seemed simple.
At least you have somewhat of a life. That is a really good start. You have lots of friends who seem to overlook your "flaws". They must be good people. The alcohol thing..don't worry about it...you can stay sober and then tell your friends what they did while they were drunk. I had more fun being the sober one. I didn't end up spending the night in the bathroom. It is overrated!!! We all take advantage of what we have and focus on the things we want.
Again, I appologize for coming off to harsh. I see things differently from you and should not have let that get in the way.

 
Old 08-07-2003, 11:42 PM   #13
Newbie
 
Join Date: May 2003
Posts: 6
lololololo HB User
Post

Hey everyone, even though I don't have acne so I don't know how you feel but I think I also am allergic to alcohol.

I wish you the best of luck with these issues and this might be a little off topic but what are the syptoms of having alcohol allergy? Whenever I have a couple drinks my face turns red and blemishes but other parts of my body doesn't..

If I am allergic to alcohol I guess, I'll have to quit drinking and just watch other people drink have fun but don't let those things put you down.

Sorry for being a little off topic, but last time I posted under Allergies section I didn't get any replies so please, what are the symptons or how would I know?

 
Old 08-07-2003, 11:44 PM   #14
Newbie
 
Join Date: May 2003
Posts: 6
lololololo HB User
Post

Hey everyone, even though I don't have acne so I don't know how you feel but I think I also am allergic to alcohol.

I wish you the best of luck with these issues and this might be a little off topic but what are the syptoms of having alcohol allergy? Whenever I have a couple drinks my face turns red and blemishes but other parts of my body doesn't..

If I am allergic to alcohol I guess, I'll have to quit drinking and just watch other people drink have fun but don't let those things put you down.

Sorry for being a little off topic, but last time I posted under Allergies section I didn't get any replies so please, what are the symptons or how would I know?

 
Old 08-12-2003, 01:29 PM   #15
Newbie
 
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: san antonio tx us
Posts: 2
staci77 HB User
Post

alright so that sounds like it sucks but it isnt all bad you have to see life for whatever is good about it trust me people see my life and think it is pretty bad but it isnt and the whole acne thing will hopefully go away and not drinkin at parties omg who cares you are still invited to those parties just bc you cant drink doesnt mean you cant have fun i have been to plenty of parties and i havent drank you should think of that as a good thing bc you could have done something terrible under alchol seriously you could have been saved from so much from yourself and i really respect you for wanting more in a relationship than sex you will find a girl who does care for you not for sex and they will see past your achne and non alcholic ways just be patient and stop being so negative no girls want that and dont just give your heart away

 
Closed Thread

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Board Replies Last Post
I hate being fat..... Katiethree Obesity 5 06-16-2009 03:17 PM
I just need help because I hate myself so much. I am so fat. luv2sing Weight Loss 25 04-08-2008 04:35 PM
I hate living with this anger, i dont no how to but i no i have to! tizzy76 Anger Management 35 02-16-2008 08:18 AM
Betrayal, hate, illness, addiction, sex, abuse, porn and being a fool VoodooQueen Relationship Health 4 11-17-2007 04:58 PM
i HATE my life..heartbreak..hate..vent LilEeyore Depression 33 11-24-2006 11:36 PM




Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is Off
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off




Join Our Newsletter

Stay healthy through tips curated by our health experts.

Whoops,

There was a problem adding your email Try again

Thank You

Your email has been added











All times are GMT -7. The time now is 06:49 PM.



Site owned and operated by HealthBoards.com™
Copyright and Terms of Use © 1998-2014 HealthBoards.comô All rights reserved.
Do not copy or redistribute in any form!