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Old 08-22-2003, 02:22 PM   #1
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Kingofthedead HB User
Unhappy no friends!!

hey all...
i just finished gr8 and will be going into highschool when summer is over. during the last month or 2 of school i had some problems but i just recentley found out that almost everyone hates me !! I dont know whats wrong with me! im just worried that when i go to highschool i wont have anyone to hang out with If anyone can help me with some ideas on getting my friends back id apreciate it, or maby some tips for highschool, thanks!

 
Old 08-22-2003, 04:55 PM   #2
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hey i'm going into highschool to this year. To get your friends back you have to prove to them that there wrong about you and your really a nice person. Just be nice and be yourself thats the best thing anyone can do.

 
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Old 08-22-2003, 05:06 PM   #3
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talk to people, find out their interests.
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Old 08-22-2003, 08:26 PM   #4
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yeah except i have been "nice". its just i get along great with girls and stuff but alotta the guys i hang with, or used to..r all messed towards me

 
Old 08-22-2003, 08:30 PM   #5
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This'll probably sound cliche, but dude just be yourself. If you like playing guitar, then play guitar. If you like cars, then stick with cars. If you like computers, then stick with computers. If you have to change yourself to have friends, then they won't be good friends. Besides, there should be alot of new people to meet in high school... trust me, you'll find people with similar interests.

-Patrick
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Old 08-22-2003, 08:44 PM   #6
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Dont try to link up old friendships and change yourself to fit in with the old guy friends, cause then you'll appear to be the follow. DONT WORRY HIGHSCHOOL IS TOTALLY DIFFERENT you will meet tons of people just like you (not the no-friends part) and you'll fit in fine, i know people who have had no friends until this year, (for me) and are now very very popular. it will flux!

 
Old 08-22-2003, 08:46 PM   #7
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Quote:
Originally posted by Kingofthedead:
[ i just recentley found out that almost everyone hates me !!
Do you know what you did that made them hate you? It would help if you know why they hate you. So you can work it out. If you did something bad, then apologize. If you don't think you did something horrible, but your 'friends' think you did, then explain that you didn't mean whatever it is. But if you're sure that you didn't do something that upset them, then there's nothing wrong with you. It's them.

One more thing, how did you find out? Is that source reliable? Maybe they don't hate you and you just misunderstood them.

When did it exactly happen though? If it happened right weeks ago, I'm pretty sure they'd forget it by now.

Also remember that high school is way different. You'd definitely meet new people, so befriend with them. I mean, your classmates in grade 8 won't be the only ones in high school. Sometimes, it's time to move on from your grade school friends and meet others. Explore.

But if you really want to stick with your old pals. You have to talk to them. (guys don't usually talk about their "feelings," do they? I'm assuming here that you're a guy). But hey, a handshake, a nod, or pat on the back is good enough to tell you that you're friends again.

Just hang out with them, and if they ignore you, then it definitely means that they are angry at you (I still have the feeling that they are not, I don't think pubescent boys hold grudges that long on something that isn't even severe.)

Though I'm pretty sure at least one of them would talk to you, someone who is closer among the group. Good luck



 
Old 08-22-2003, 08:59 PM   #8
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thanks all, i mean, i didnt do anything, but forget them. highschools comin up and theres tons of new people...(and yes im a guy, and yeah theres a few i still talk to but dont really "hang" with) Whatever, i guess i am/was worried bout like the first day of school, yknow? everyone has the feeling, but i dunno if i walk up to my old friends and if they mouth off to me or somthing, i dunno what i'd do...does everyone group up after summer in highschool with their old friends like in grade school?

 
Old 08-22-2003, 09:35 PM   #9
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Glad to hear it.

Quote:
does everyone group up after summer in highschool with their old friends like in grade school?
Definitely and more. You're older and more mature and have more freedom. You'd do things you don't normally do in grade school. I won't give you details, as you'll encounter them one by one. Think of it as an unexpected journey.


 
Old 08-22-2003, 09:40 PM   #10
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ok, but if i wanted to meet some new people, what do i just walk into a group of people (that i dont know) and say hi? thatd be kinda weird wouldnt it?

 
Old 08-22-2003, 10:02 PM   #11
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Yeah it would sound weird. But that's not the kind of situations I was trying to make. Opportunities will present themselves.

For example.

First day of school, in math class, another guy sits beside you, say something smart or funny just to start a converstaion. "This teacher can't even teach." or "Homework already, this is only the first day."

He has to response because you're talking to him. Worse thing can happen is that he likes math. But at least you tried and started a converstaion. You might even hit it off.

The person who sits beside you at the beginning would most likely sit beside you until the school year is over. So say "what's up" once in a while.

Another thing, APPROACH those kids who are by themselves. They're probably like you, looking for friends.

Join clubs, teams, any school activities. What do you like, basketball? Chess? Reading books? Join this kind of thing. THEN you can say HI. It woudn't be weird because the leader/members of the clubs expect you to.

Note: I was shy but I became a Peer Leader in high school. Not only I was boosting my self confidence and meeting new people by becoming a Peer Leader but I was also helping new high school student to adapt and adjust. So my advice is join any group you like.

Good luck.

 
Old 08-23-2003, 05:26 AM   #12
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Hey King, you sound a lot like me when I went into High School. It was like everyone hated me, etc. I was shaking in my shoes about the first day especially. I didn't have a friend to hang with. So school started, and I just started talking to people in class, made friends, everything went well.

Except all the friends I made just completely deceived and abandoned me. I got involved in a type of peer mentoring program at school. Through there I made adult friends. Even though Friday nights were/are lonely, I don't care. I know I won't be alone when I go out into the world. Clubs and organizations like that really help out. I just graduated from High School, and I don't have many friends. You'll learn that they kinda just all go their own separate ways, and some stay stuck in High School. Relax, High School is all about popularity, etc. Which is not something that matters....at all.

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~I am but one small instrument~
~Smile, you live longer~
Paradigm shift to proactivity saves lives.
A smile will save this world, some of us just don't know that yet.

 
Old 08-23-2003, 08:51 AM   #13
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when i read that i was like reading my story after grade 8. believe it will all get better, I feel like I have true friends now. I lost all the losers that talked about me and treated me like crap. And now most of them are going to nowhere. I am not almost done highschool and although 9th grade was hard, it was such a great lesson to whomy true friends were.

also you will meet alot of new people in your new classes.

[This message has been edited by lilmissaim (edited 08-23-2003).]
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Old 08-23-2003, 09:53 AM   #14
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james 4567 HB User
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THEY will come to you. if your a metalhead, wear a shirt from one of the conerts you've been to, etc, and when you talk to people, like during class ask about what they like to do see if you have anything in common. I dont know you as a person, but im sure you understand that every one of them is thinking the same thing you are, and you may think of this as bad advice, but an easy way to gain respect and tons of friends(tho I hate to admit it and i never did it myself, but have seen it in many cases) is if the kid mouths you off, give em a quick strong one right to the face, i sound like a friggin doctor but if you do it right he wont bother you again, and kids wil respect you for 1. not being a wuss, 2. being confident, 3. (BEING A FIGHTER) and 4. if any of his friends jump in, others will also to mess them up, because you never jump into a 1on1 fight =)

anyway, you know how fast word gets around in school of anything from a fight to a bad-day for a teacher, so imagine you winning a fight the first day of school? Mr Popularity

-Only if he mouths you off, dont pick it yourself
-If not, just find friends like yourself
-If you hear he's talking behind your back about you, thats another reason to f him up.

 
Old 08-23-2003, 10:35 AM   #15
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Here we go again.


Quote:
but an easy way to gain respect and tons of friends is if the kid mouths you off, give em a quick strong one right to the face,
Talk about being a bad boy! Radical.

I feel that it might work, but I'm just going to remind you, KingoftheDead, of the consequences. Then feel free to do it once you think you're ready for the consequences.

Quote:
but if you do it right he wont bother you again,
If you don't do it right, for sure he'll punch back. So be sure that you're strong enough to take 'em.

Quote:
and kids wil respect you
Not necessarily.
1. They'll think your a bully/jerk.
2. Confidence, yeah? But punching is not the only way to prove it.
3. Detention for a week. They might call our parents. You get into trouble = punishment.
4. Mental, bad record.

Do you think it's worth it just to gain popularity?

One more thing, those people you'd punch, for sure they'll avoid you as long as they want. I thought you don't want them to avoid you. huh.

 
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