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Old 02-15-2004, 04:07 PM   #1
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jillybelly HB User
Unhappy I left him... :'(

Ok, I listened to you guys.. and everybody else who knew anythign about the situation. I left Donald...

I'm so sad now. I'm all lost inside. I'm sick even. I can't believe how much it hurt him. The worst part is that he didn't act like a jerk as he normally does, he didn't hit me, he didn't do anything abnormal... He kind kind of sat there looking out into space. He was truly heart broken. He even understood why I did it. He just kept calling himself an idiot. He couldn't believe he'd done that to me.

He says he's going to get a therapist. I know it probably isn't true. However, he asked that if he ever changed could he have another chance. I told him I'd have to regain his trust first, and that it would take a very long time...

Now I feel horrible. I feel horrible because he didn't get angry, he didn't give me any excuse to blame this on him... He didn't even try and control me or threaten me...

I broke his heart... I'm such a *****. I don't think I'll ever get over this one. I just want to be alone...

Last edited by jillybelly; 02-15-2004 at 04:08 PM.

 
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Old 02-15-2004, 04:44 PM   #2
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ironbojangly14 HB User
Re: I left him... :'(

Don't worry about it. Your ex was abusive, he doesn't deserve sympathy. Trust me, you'll find another guy that will treat you right and you'll be so happy. Don't worry you did the right thing. So ya, quoting a famous Bob Marley, "Don't worry, be happy!"

 
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Old 02-15-2004, 07:27 PM   #3
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Will M. HB User
Re: I left him... :'(

I think it's good that you did that though. He'll see how bad he was, and it's good to see that he's going to get help. I think this would be good for both of you.

Peace.

 
Old 03-08-2004, 08:45 AM   #4
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Snowbunnie HB User
Re: I left him... :'(

Did you think about what you just wrote..."The worst part is that he didn't act like a jerk as he normally does, he didn't hit me, he didn't do anything abnormal... "
Doesnt that sound like there is something wrong with that? Think about it. why would u wanna be with someone where it was abnormal for them to act like a decent person?
be happy you got out bc there are many people who arent so lucky..

 
Old 03-08-2004, 09:02 AM   #5
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jillybelly HB User
Re: I left him... :'(

btu the thing was that if he was acting like that it would be easier because i could just blame it all on him. Now, I'm blaming it all on myself.

 
Old 03-08-2004, 10:43 PM   #6
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t-dash HB User
Re: I left him... :'(

Look at the bigger picture... your age span will likely go on from another 50-80 years... This could take several months, maybe a year to recover from... But imagine if you didn't do this, think how insignificant a year is compaired to being stuck with him for 5 years, 10 years, 15-30 if you were really foolish or controlled. A few years from now when things blow over and you're with someone who treats you right you'll wonder why you didn't do this sooner. Its okay to be miserable for awhile if the end result is positive. Just be accepting that you have to put in a little down time before things will get better. Insted of being wrapped up in the present, start thinking longterm into how good your future might turn out now that you're free.


Quote:
Originally Posted by jillybelly
btu the thing was that if he was acting like that it would be easier because i could just blame it all on him. Now, I'm blaming it all on myself.

Last edited by t-dash; 03-08-2004 at 10:48 PM.

 
Old 03-09-2004, 10:17 AM   #7
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eightball61 HB User
Re: I left him... :'(

Quote:
Originally Posted by jillybelly
btu the thing was that if he was acting like that it would be easier because i could just blame it all on him. Now, I'm blaming it all on myself.

Ok, Now I am very Confused

Why are you blamming yourself? Think of it this way. Who is the one that hurt you physically? Mentally? & Verbally?

Answer: The Guy

You did the best thing for yourself to break things off. If you kept the relationship going he could have ruined a lot of thing about you in the future on how you think and act. PLEASE REMEMBER you made the best decision in your life...There are only a few girls out in this world that has the guts to break things off with an abusive BF.

 
Old 03-09-2004, 06:10 PM   #8
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ErimusValidus HB User
Re: I left him... :'(

He probably acted in the way he did because he knows you would feel guilty. It's the oldest trick in the book. You did what felt right at the time and that's usually 99% failsafe.
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I have spread my dreams under your feet; tread softly because you tread on my dreams...

 
Old 03-09-2004, 08:51 PM   #9
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Magnetic HB UserMagnetic HB User
Re: I left him... :'(

This is his way of continuing his manipulation of you. He was trying to be nice as that was his way of continuting to hurt you and to try to gain the sympathy of you and his friends. This is just another one of his games. You have to believe that you are right. In time, you will KNOW that you are.

 
Old 03-10-2004, 08:39 AM   #10
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eightball61 HB User
Re: I left him... :'(

Take our advice....Don't go back to him on a guilt trip.... You'll only be hurting yourself.

 
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