It appears you have not yet Signed Up with our community. To Sign Up for free, please click here....



Teen Health Message Board
Post New Thread   Closed Thread
LinkBack Thread Tools
Old 03-19-2011, 01:44 PM   #1
Newbie
(female)
 
Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: Hesperia California America
Posts: 2
Stephy777 HB User
Does my mother truly love me?

My mother and I, well we are not close. Not at all, I have tried to do things with her but no matter what I say she disagrees or nit picks at it. One of the things is what I wear and my make up. I am just a Gothic teenager but I am not out of control. I have advanced placement classes, I have excellent grades and I have a job that pays more then minimum wage. I try to help out around the house by cooking, cleaning and I buy my mother things to try to be nice but yet it does not work

She is constantly yelling at me about how I did not do things the right way. How my grades are not good enough. Whenever I need new clothes I ask her if she will take me to a thrift store or something like that. (My father does make good money and we are not poor. I just like the simple things in life and not making my parents buy me expensive things.) Well she will nag and ***** about how she does not have the money but guess who goes out the next second to buy beer and cigarettes. She is constantly drinking and constantly putting me down.

I have gained weight due to her constantly pointing out all the bad things about myself. The only comfort I feel like I have is food so I start eating. She will tell me how I can never do anything correct, I am an idiot and a failure at life. Also that I look like white trash and just an idiot and I embarrass her. Hearing these things every day have made me have no self esteem what so ever. I have actually had suicide thoughts because she just makes me feel like a worthless piece of trash.

I know one of the things is go to my father about this but I can't. He is always working and the ONLY time I have with him is taking me to school in the morning. That is only about five minutes so I do not get to spend a lot of time with him. I do tell him what my mother says and does but he doesn't have time to handle it.

A recent thing that has happened is my mother was yelling at me and invading my personal place. I calmly said "Mom, please back up. I do not want to speak to you, you are invading my space and I would appreciate it if you would kindly leave me alone." Well in a fit of rage grabbed my stuff and threw it. I was angered but knew not to fight or it would make things worse. She then proceeded to push me and grab my arms quite hard.

She has done things like this before, throwing my books, my ipod or cell phone at the walls. She has even thrown my favorite pair of Dr. Marten boots away that my father bought me for my birthday. I had to go and dig them out of the dirty trash to retrieve them.

She tells me that she wishes I was never born and how much more money they would have if it was not for my asthma, eye sight problems and the outrageous amount of debt I put them in when I was born. I was premature and only weighed two pounds, also I had an over sized heart, lungs and kidneys.

I am constantly on new inhalers due to my horrible asthma and I go in and out of the hospital due to being so emotionally upset towards my mother. I do not know how to fix this until I move away to college and that is still another three years away. I do not know if my mother truly loves me or if she has mental issues. I just need help dealing with her and how to stop myself from the emotional eating.

And another thing is my mother treats my cousins like her own daughters. Buying them new and expensive things, giving them anything they want and going out and doing things with them. When I want to join them my cousins will make a remark like well you have to walk about fifty feet away because we do not want anyone to know you are related to us. I feel ashamed of myself and want to just be done with life and never have to embarrass my family again.

 
Sponsors Lightbulb
   
Old 03-19-2011, 03:01 PM   #2
Senior Veteran
(male)
 
pendulum's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Florianópolis, Brazil
Posts: 3,714
pendulum HB Userpendulum HB Userpendulum HB Userpendulum HB Userpendulum HB Userpendulum HB Userpendulum HB Userpendulum HB Userpendulum HB Userpendulum HB Userpendulum HB User
Re: Does my mother truly love me?

We have all seen this movie before.

Anyway, that is a terrible situation to be in and I really feel for you.

That said, I strongly exhort you not to do anything against your own life. It is not worth your while.

I think it is just a question of time until you can get rid of this, but I know this is no consolation for you.

I would suggest you seek the emotional support from someone older, since your father is not available. Maybe a teacher, a relative, a neighbor - someone you can trust and open up to.

It won't be the solution of your problems, but at least it will give you some relief.

Are you into sports or something like that? This would help you to shed some of the current stress. Even voluntary work would help you.

Be strong, please, but seek the support from people who can listen to you.

I don't think we need to hear your mother's version. I can't answer your answer if she loves you or not. Possibly she doesn't even love herself. And probably she also has some mental issues.

If you can pray, pray for her also.

 
Closed Thread

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Board Replies Last Post
What role does self.... evy38 Relationship Health 12 06-20-2010 12:16 PM
My Bad Relationship With My Mother thinkseriously Relationship Health 7 11-05-2009 12:13 PM
Toxic Mother/Daughter Relationship 40FabFit Relationship Health 7 07-02-2009 03:36 PM
In alot of PAIN. Does he want me back? blue34 Relationship Health 103 09-04-2008 06:21 PM
Does it ever go away???? simplyj Relationship Health 25 05-20-2008 05:28 PM




Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is Off
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off




Join Our Newsletter

Stay healthy through tips curated by our health experts.

Whoops,

There was a problem adding your email Try again

Thank You

Your email has been added








TOP THANKED CONTRIBUTORS



Seraph (7), rosequartz (6), writeleft (6), lenvegas (4), Kszan (3), Diverdan8 (2), ERpiguy (2), solofelix (2), frisbeefreak (2), SoundsFamiliar (2)

Site Wide Totals

teteri66 (1164), MSJayhawk (997), Apollo123 (898), Titchou (832), janewhite1 (823), Gabriel (758), ladybud (745), sammy64 (666), midwest1 (665), BlueSkies14 (610)



All times are GMT -7. The time now is 04:42 AM.



Site owned and operated by HealthBoards.com™
Terms of Use © 1998-2014 HealthBoards.com™ All rights reserved.
Do not copy or redistribute in any form!