Oh, I'm sorry you had such a difficult relationship with your father growing up. And, I know dealing with your mom and dad's separation must be really tough.
And, I don't think you can heal from all this overnight. Of course, that's not to say that you shouldn't have a relationship with your dad if he's sincere about wanting to change. But, I do think it would be great if your family could work through all the problems and pain you've gone through-maybe with a counselor? Is that something your mom or dad would ever be willing to do-or maybe allow you to do? I realize that it can be expensive, but I know there's organizations that can sometimes work with your financial situations. In fact, from my time at Focus on the Family, I know they have counseling over the phone available free of charge (1-855-771-HELP). Or, do you know of an adult you respect who could help your family during this time? Maybe a local church or pastor could give you or your family some support? And, if counseling doesn't work out, I came across a book a book called Help! My Family's Messed Up!
that talks about some of what you've been facing. I know you can find it online or maybe even at a library. Not sure if you're a reader, but just a thought! Well, I really do hope your dad is making real changes in his life and your family can heal your relationships. I guess that's something that only you can know for sure. You'll be in my thoughts and prayers!