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Old 08-31-2004, 03:01 PM   #1
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Went to doc today,also a vent....

I still am not sure about what to think. I was so anscious about talking to him about what was going on, then I got in the room and my mind grew blank- and I felt like a total idiot. I kept thinking the lump was found a year and a half ago, but he said its been less than half a year ago.....gosh, I feel like my mind is fluttering away. I'm schedueled to have a biopsy ASAP (next week), because of the rapid growth, and because the ultrasound and radioactive scan were unable to rule out a tumor. He also said that since its showing up as cold, the chance of malignancy is raised. He said if its cancer, I will be going to U of M, because he doesn't feel comfortable having the problem taken care of around here.
And I'm absolutely crushed, because I basically have no one dependable to help me with my kids while I have more blood work and the biopsy done- or the problem taken care of if it's cancer. I had asked my mom to watch my kids today (I didn't want them to have to hear about anything-their too young to be worrying), and she promised she would. She knew I had the apointment, but still ditched me. She tried telling me that my brothers babysitter didn't call or show today- and he needed an emergency sitter. He may have needed a sitter- but it wasn't a sudden thing- because my mom told me a week and a half ago that his sitter had another appointment today- but she said my dad was going to watch his kids for him-because-in her words- "I promised you I'd watch your kids, and I'm watching your kids." Sure mom- I hear ya. But I guess I should have learned my lesson by now- my family pulled the same thing when I had my liver biopsy, my last three c-sections, and my sons stomach surgery. The night before my liver biopsy they called and said they wouldn't be able to watch my kids, couldn't take me to the hospital, and wouldn't be able to pick me up. I had to call my husband- we were seperated at the time- and ask him to help. Why can't they just understand- if you can't help-don't promise me you will! At least I'll know to look for other help then.
I'm sorry, I don't mean to sound so upset- and I shouldn't make all of you listen to my venting, but I really needed to get this of my chest.
Its just been a long day.

Thanks for listening,
myladyshyanne

 
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Old 09-01-2004, 05:33 AM   #2
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Re: Went to doc today,also a vent....

I'm sorry your mom lets you down over and over again. That isn't the way it's supposed to be; but sadly, she isn't the only mom in the world who does that.
I've never been exactly in your situation, but I'd think an unsupportive mother and family might even be worse than the threat of thyroid cancer... That makes me sad for you. I wish I had some good suggestions for making them shape up and do the right thing.

As for the cancer part of your problem, though... Try to ease your mind with these facts. Over 90% of nodules are NOT cancer, and the cure rate for those that are is something like 94%. Thyroid cancer hardly ever spreads. You should be fine... keep that in mind.
And don't worry about venting. Support groups are designed for venting. We understand and don't mind at all.
... So how about it, Group? Thirty viewers "listened" to myladyshyanne before I finally answered her. I hope most of those thirty were unregistered viewers who aren't allowed to post. So to any member who sees this... How about offering her some words of support now?

Last edited by midwest1; 09-01-2004 at 05:35 AM.

 
Old 09-01-2004, 06:01 AM   #3
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Re: Went to doc today,also a vent....

yes it is very hard to understand the reasonings behind some family dynamics. I have had similar but not so great as you problems in that field, but always had my husband to fall back on should family members fail.

Like midwest says...the odds are in your favour really they are. If you should have to have your thyroid removed so many members here have been through that, both non cancer reason and the few that were not. All are fine and well, and the problem is that eternal trying to 'regulate your medications'

Do you have a close friend or neighbour you can trust, a group from Church or a parent of one of your childrens school mates or play group mom? I am sorry I did not answer your post, and feel bad, and my only excuse is I was on another board trying to search out some answers....came back here to see whats up, and saw your reply.

Thankyou Midwest for pointing it out, sometimes we do get caught up in our own problems, and it is not acceptable when others are let down.

Dear Myladyshyanne (can we shorten this huh?) haha believe me somehow it will all work out. Next doctor vist write a list (most of us here do that due to the infamous brain fog)

Bonnie Lea

 
Old 09-01-2004, 09:23 AM   #4
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Re: Went to doc today,also a vent....

Thank you or your replies. It means alot.

I do have a friend I went to school with who may help me out. I'm hesitant on asking her though, because she has five kids of her own. I also am still friends with the kids' old daycare provider. She would probably help me out if needed. She's really good with kids, and I'd probably feel more at ease leaving the kids in her care than my friends. I wish I could count on my husband (we got back together because of my health, and having two kids w/ADHD, and going through a very complicated pregnancy), but unfortuanately, a friend of his and the friends wife were in an accident, and he's too busy helping them. I guess I understand that though. He's known them for a while, and there's no one else who will really help them if he doesn't. Right now the main burden of the farm is resting on the couples 11 year old son-which I have gained ALOT of respect for the kid. He's trying very hard, but just can't do it all. My husband started to complain about the poor kid the other day-because he said the farm was going down hill. I just told him not to say a word bad about the kid, because his life has been turned upside down, and he's been thrown into an adults position. I also told him I had more respect for that child than I did the rest of the family....because he's accepted the role he should have never been asked to accept.
Yes, I think your right, an undependable family support can be more damaging than cancer. If you have cancer, you know what you have-you know its there. With a family like mine, you never know, and that is frusterating, sad, and all around exhausting.

Thanks again,
ladyshy

 
Old 09-01-2004, 01:28 PM   #5
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Re: Went to doc today,also a vent....

I just wanted to say hang in there. I know it's not easy taking care of kids especially if you are not feeling well. Things are bound to get better for you. Please keep us updated.

Tonya

 
Old 09-01-2004, 01:33 PM   #6
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Re: Went to doc today,also a vent....

Don't be too proud to accept help from wherever you can get it.
I hope you'll let us know what the outcome of your tests is and what your treatment will be.
Best of luck. mw1

 
Old 09-02-2004, 10:50 AM   #7
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Re: Went to doc today,also a vent....

I hear ya with the family issues.

A word of encouragement: don't be afraid to ask for help and to put YOURSELF first sometimes. It sounds like you really need to put yourself at the top of the priority list. I know, I was a major doormat for other people for a long time.

You will be in my prayers.

 
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