I don't know how you all do it. I've been reading your posts... and don't know how you keep on "keeping on". I am so sick and tired of being "sick and tired" Not only do i feel all alone. I am. I do not live that close to family (which is probably a good thing... since we didn't get along all that well) and my co workers think i am moody. And friends, well meaning that they might be think that i am crazy. And i am starting to wonder if they are right. My boyfriend moved out.... i've gained weight.. he deserves the girl that he fell for .. and i haven't been her for some time.and the tears are too much for him to deal with.. Heck... they are too much for anyone to deal with. Geez, I sound pathetic... but it's the truth. Ever since i had a partial thyroidectomy 4 years ago, i haven't felt the same. It wasn't that bad at first, but over the last few months it has been terrible. I am choking more easily (which i have done since surgery....they paralyzed vocal chords during the operation) I am so tired that i am having a hard time getting off the couch. I have managed to keep my job...even with the enormouse overtime that we have to put in. (but it is a struggle). I feel like i am in a constant fog, unable to make complete sentences at times. And the depression and tears. I don't think that i can keep doing it. I just want it to stop and i don't care how. I went to the doctor a month ago... and he was adamant that the TSH is the only sensitive lab to be checked....mine was .17. I am on 200mcg of Synthroid. But after reading the posts here...am going to insist that he check the free T3 and free T4 levels ( I go back October 14th). I know i shouldn't go on like this.... I feel like i am whining. I also feel like now that i have started... i may never stop. Sorry. I've enjoyed reading your posts... and have learned a great deal... I just don't think i am as strong as the people here. Anyway, thanks for letting me vent.
Knothead, you're not crazy, you're not alone and vent all you want - it really helps. We know how you feel, we've been there (heck, I was there yesterday after a week of feeling pretty good).
I'm going to steal a line from Midwest1 and suggest you fire that doctor and find yourself one who will listen to you. There is no reason for you to have to feel this way when you can be treated and feel better. It makes me so angry dealing with doctors who just won't listen and insist they know everything. They don't.
Have you printed off the information on the correct tests and the right ranges? There was a post by Lady50 yesterday called "I still can't get what I want" with all the info - taking this to your doctor or a new one might help.
Don't give up, you deserve to be healthy. Go through the information archive - there are posts on how to interview a new doctor, what supplements can help (and they really can help) and where to find good thyroid docs. This place is a treasure trove of information and it has helped me immensely. And remember, you're not alone!
A foolish consistency is the hobgoblin of little minds.
Will check out the archives and the other things you've suggested. Maybe if i go in "armed" the doc will have to listen.
Thank you for listening... it helps. The people that i've read here all seem to be so kind. I don't usually "vent" ... not usually anyone to vent to. But this seemed to be the perfect place.
I am sorry that you had a bad day yesterday. I really do know how that feels. Seems the bad days are out numbering the good ones. Hope you feel better soon.
Anyway, thanks so much for all of your help.
No, you aren't alone. Whine till you can whine no more.... and then get busy finding a better doctor. Just because that one has an MD behind his name, it doesn't make him all-knowing about thyroid. Most of us who've had success in our treatment have had to switch MDs several times before finding one who knows what he/she is doing. I'm on my third, and he's a gem. It takes an average of 6 consultations before finding a good thyroid doctor. Learn everything you can about your condition and how to treat it; an informed patient nearly always does better than one who leaves everything up to the MD.
Do you have a little energy left to do some reading? I know it's hard to finish a chapter or two when the brain fog is so heavy, but once you see how common this situation is... and that it isfixable, you will find hope.
Start with Solved: The Riddle of Illness by Dr. Stephen Langer. Dr. Kenneth Blanchard's book, What Your Doctor May Not Tell You About Hypothyroidism is an eye-opener, too.
There is much controversy about the way to treat this disorder, and there are fewer doctors who know how to do it well than there are those who don't; but good ones can be found. It's very likely you can't change your MD's mind about the Almighty TSH being the only test necessary. Docs are usually a stubborn lot, and their egos won't let their minds be easily changed. It might take all the strength you can muster, but please don't quit looking for that certain one who will help you regain your health.
If you can't find the ideas for finding a good doctor that have been posted here many times, just say so, and we'll direct you to them.
Like Nat, you are a Godsend. Thank you so much for the information. Think i will try to pull myself together, get out of this house, and go see about those books. Geez... this board and you all have helped already... haven't even considered going out other than work, in a long time. Thanks.
Sorry to say i am probably going to need a good kick in my butt from time to time..... So thanks ahead of time.... Knothead.
Sorry... didn't see your post... Thank you too! Gosh this place is full of wonderful people. Will look up the Docs on the list... unfortunately, with insurance the way it is.... not sure what can be done about switching... but am going to look into it.
Hugs to all for your understanding and help knothead
Last edited by knothead; 09-19-2004 at 09:07 AM.
Reason: additional thanks
Totally totally understand (Y) oh boy and we all do!!!!!! hang in there its hard !! But lm sure 1 day although not soon enough we will all look back on these times fingers crossed xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx love niecsey xxx
Thanks to all!!!
So much for good intentions. Fell asleep on the couch (what a surprise ) And i feel like crying.... both of which have become the norm rather than the exception. Can't wait til that changes. Although am afraid to hold my breath. Thanks to everyone who responded.... It helps to know that their are others out there who are going through this (although i hate to think of anyone having to deal with this stuff). You all have been wonderful.
And it helps to have someone to talk to. You are all angels....
As soon as i get a little more ooomph... will check out the books suggested and maybe be able to stay on the computer a little longer and do some research. Right now.... i just wanted to say Thanks.