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Old 02-28-2005, 03:31 AM   #1
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Skyela HB User
Unhappy Hard situation

Hey all,

I am wondering if anyone can help me. I have just come of my birth control pill because of the risk factor of thrombosus. *spelling*. Anyway.. Just last month me and my partner decided we would wait another 6months to try for a child. And now that Im off it. Neither of us have talked about using any type of birth control. I'm not sure how I feel about it all.

We have had unproteced sex a couple of times with no worries, and now im starting to feel a little unsettled. I want children and he is the one that wanted to wait. Yet hes not making any concious choices to either talk about it or inforce he wants protection.

I know its a situation that needs sorting out- i just want some advice.

Thanks xx

 
Old 02-28-2005, 11:55 AM   #2
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rayray9 HB User
Re: Hard situation

i would sit him down and ask him " are you ready for a child because the way we are doing things we are heading for a pregnancy" see how he responds and tell him he has to use a condom. and if he wont and you dont think he wants a child yet and are uneasy take protection into your hands by using spermacide or a diaphram.. the last thing you want is to be pregnant with a partner who is not ready. who knows what these men can do sometimes. just be careful. make sure you talk about this. good luck

 
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Old 03-01-2005, 06:08 PM   #3
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skl_1979 HB User
Re: Hard situation

Skylea,
I'm with Ray Ray on this one. The last thing you need to worry about is rasing a child on your own. We are military and that alone things happens way to often to be thought of lightly! Consider children like you would buying a 30 year loan, you will be stuck with your choice and his. And it may be cliche' but his lack of voice is as much of a choice and saying yes or no!
-S

 
Old 03-02-2005, 03:33 AM   #4
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Skyela HB User
Re: Hard situation

hey both of ya and thanks for the reply.

I sat him down last night and talked about it,he admits not thinking about it when we had unprotected and told him it hurt me as I was thinking he was ready for children..etc etc

He then said that we could take it as it comes, and now doesnt want to plan for a child. This is comming from a man that likes to make very informed- calculated descions..so who knows.
He says it will happen when its meant to happen..but before his mind frame was..." got to wait longer"

*sighs*

 
Old 03-02-2005, 07:08 AM   #5
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rayray9 HB User
Re: Hard situation

im sorry. my DH was the same. until i thought i was PG ( which i was not,thus am here) but then when the idea that it was here and he had no choice he thought about it. when i told him it was n- now he wants one bad!! i hope things turn around for you

 
Old 03-02-2005, 01:31 PM   #6
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Skyela HB User
Re: Hard situation

Hey rayray xx

Thanks for the reply, I think men are weird about responsibilty at times..they wait for the "right time".

I am thinking of leaving the subject for now and actually waiting until we are BOTH easy about the subject- he loves children to bits and wants them within the next 2 years forsure, so..I guess time will tell and things can happen or change

 
Old 03-03-2005, 05:59 AM   #7
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sammieP HB User
Re: Hard situation

Just wanted to say good luck with whatever happens, hopefully he will change his mind and want them sooner, i had the same with my husband and we decided to drop the subject for a while, 4 months later he tells me he wants children now and i should stop my injection, so i did and here we are, still ttc but it was worth waiting for him to say ' lets do it hun', one day your time will come and it really will make your day.

Good luck and take care, sammiepxxx

 
Old 03-05-2005, 04:48 AM   #8
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skl_1979 HB User
Re: Hard situation

Sammie P
must have my DH because it was the same for me. Sweet and caring man that he is said wait first and then when we were settled said "GETRDUNN!" Sorry way to much time spent watching Foxworthy! But it was fitting for his personality and just one of the small things that makes the whole picture perfect! (esp after first DH was such a disapointment "understatment") Gota run,
Puppy potty time!
-S

 
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