Thanks for the information you have provided me.
I'm really sorry that your surgeries have left you in such a state of dismay.
I can only hope that when you are completely healed things look better than they do now. I do believe that when we have a loving wife and companion to share our sorrows with that we find that things can be overcome and not look so bad. You should confide in her about your feelings about the surgery because only through your communication can you feel better about it and also give her a chance to relate to what your going through and help her to understand what your needs are at this moment.
I'm 50 years old and have been married to my current wife for 19 years and through active communication, sharing our deepest feelings, and even crying and praying together have we been able to keep our marriage on track. My wife has become disabled since we've been married and all these things help me to understand what she goes thorugh on a daily basis. It also helps her to understand what I'm now going through with my future surgery. You should have seen the both of us when we recently had to have our dog of 18 plus years put to sleep. We both cried like we had lost our child. I truely believe if we didn't share as much as we do with each other we would never be able to get past all the trials and tribulations that happen on this earth. I've taught my son's that there is a time for a man to be macho and times that he needs to be able to open up to his spouse and even let his emotions flow. A good wife will charish her husband for being able to do this and won't think he is less of a man for it.
When I went through my circumcision and last meatus surgery the Air Force doctor that performed the surgery caused complications which affected me for months. He didn't close up the stitches tight enough where my remaining fore skin met my penis and they came loose. I could actually place my finger between the fore skin and my penis up inside myself. My penis and testicals swole up to several times their normal size and turned more black than blue. My wife joked that I was probably one of the only white men who knew what it was like to have a black penis. The swelling went done after a few weeks but the discoloration lasted for months. I can still get an erection but when I ejaculate I no longer get the forceful muscle spasms that I once achieved. It's weak spasms and much less fulfilling. I'm kinda happy my wife who is now 56 is no longer is interested in sex because I don't have to perform to achieve these results.
I'm just waiting now for the surgery to be scheduled. It will probably happen in September. Whatever the results it's got to be better that the painful urinations that I'm currently feeling. I did however find that after three glasses of wine I no longer feel the pain.
Let me know how things are going with you and I'll do the same. I hope that what you and I contribute to this message board helps others in the long run.