Hi, in November of last year I went to my doctor because I was workin full time, attending school full time, and obsessed with my 3 year old. He was all I ever thought about since the day he was born and so having joint custody with his father was a nightmare. I would literally get physically sick worrying whenever he would go to his dad's for the weekend. And not because he has a bad father, I just worried non stop about this little boy. Anyways, my doctor prescribed me Paxil. Biggest mistake of my life. I took it and after 1 week I started feeling nauseous. Around the end of the 2nd week I was nauseous 24/7 and decide to stop taking the Paxil cold turkey. Well, I ended up having to be rushed to the ER due to having a major panic/anxiety attack. I continued to have these awful panic attacks and derealization for months. Since then I have not been the person I have been my entire life.
I feel so flatlined, disconnected from everything and everyone in my life. I don't get excited about anything. On the other hand, it always feels like my heart is racing and I'm worried I'm going to freak out. I just read the mood cute by Julia Ross and have identified myself as having the black cloud and blahs. For the depression it says to take 5htp or tryptophan. And for the blahs GABA or tyrosine. It also mentions SJW (I tried previously but not for long and noticed no improvement).
It seems there are so many things out there and I need something to get me out of the blahs where I can't focus or care about anything but nothing to stimulate me and make my anxiety/panic worse. Does anyone have any suggestions?
To anyone that replies, thank you SO much. I have literally felt that my life is over since stopping Paxil in December. It is so hard to fathom feeling like such a completely different person overnight and I have been so scared and tired of this.
I just want me back. I used to care do much about everyone else I could literally feel someone else's happiness or hurt and now I do not feel like I care at all but yet I know I do. I just don't have it in me.