Hi, in November of last year I went to my doctor because I was workin full time, attending school full time, and obsessed with my 3 year old. He was all I ever thought about since the day he was born and so having joint custody with his father was a nightmare. I would literally get physically sick worrying whenever he would go to his dad's for the weekend. And not because he has a bad father, I just worried non stop about this little boy. Anyways, my doctor prescribed me Paxil. Biggest mistake of my life. I took it and after 1 week I started feeling nauseous. Around the end of the 2nd week I was nauseous 24/7 and decide to stop taking the Paxil cold turkey. Well, I ended up having to be rushed to the ER due to having a major panic/anxiety attack. I continued to have these awful panic attacks and derealization for months. Since then I have not been the person I have been my entire life.
I feel so flatlined, disconnected from everything and everyone in my life. I don't get excited about anything. On the other hand, it always feels like my heart is racing and I'm worried I'm going to freak out. I just read the mood cute by Julia Ross and have identified myself as having the black cloud and blahs. For the depression it says to take 5htp or tryptophan. And for the blahs GABA or tyrosine. It also mentions SJW (I tried previously but not for long and noticed no improvement).
It seems there are so many things out there and I need something to get me out of the blahs where I can't focus or care about anything but nothing to stimulate me and make my anxiety/panic worse. Does anyone have any suggestions?
To anyone that replies, thank you SO much. I have literally felt that my life is over since stopping Paxil in December. It is so hard to fathom feeling like such a completely different person overnight and I have been so scared and tired of this. I just want me back. I used to care do much about everyone else I could literally feel someone else's happiness or hurt and now I do not feel like I care at all but yet I know I do. I just don't have it in me.
My experience with GABA has been good for helping me sleep. Tryptophan is also reported to help raise serotonin levels and help with sleep and anxiety. 5 HTP made me very sick, vomiting, etc, so if you try it so with a low dose at bedtime, like 25 mg at bedtime. ST John's Wort is reported to help with depression also. My suggestion would be to pick one, and start it by itself until you see how you feel with it. After a few days, start another (add it, don't stop the first) and see if you feel a difference in 10 days. Then add a third. That was if you have reaction to any, you'll know which it was. Sometimes the combinations on supplements work better than just one by itself. I take 500mg GABA currently plus inositol 500mg to counteract elevated histadine that makes me anxious and unable to sleep.
I'd start weeding out any and all junk foods while adding healthy fruits, vegetables, and whole grains to your diet. Poor food choices can compromise the immune system and act as triggers for many other diseases/conditions. If your busy schedule doesn't allow 15-20 min of daily sun exposure (w/o sunscreen) then also add a quality vit D3 supplement (2000 IU liquid or gelcap - 1X or 2x per day). A good multivitamin couldn't hurt either (vits A,B's,C,D,E,K, magnesium, chromium, selenium, calcium, iodine, zinc, copper, maganese, molybdenum, etc.). If the E is from the synthetic di-alpha tocopherals (it's listed on the label) rather than the more useful d-alpha, toss those multi's as the product is not up to snuff. Same comment if the Vit D is from ergocalciferal....toss it. You want D3 from cholicalciferol. Vit B's should be in the 25-50 mg range initially. I'd also include more omega-3 oils via ground flax seeds, flax meal, or fish oil. Dairy products, processed foods with MSG and other preservatives can all do a number on one's digestive system. I'd always start here and with diet before piling on the medications.
If you don't have the time to research yourself discus with a knowledgeable holistic physician or health food store owner. Vitamin D (via the sun) can do wonders to reverse mood issues not to mention overall health. If it were me, I'd get as many doses of 30-60 min of mid-day sunshine as I could fit in until I felt better. Start off slowly with 10-20 min if you are fair skinned and have no prior exposure. Get some moderate exercise in as well if only 20-45 minute walks. Good luck.