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Old 07-27-2003, 05:00 PM   #1
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versusthefridge HB User
Post Parents, loved ones

Wow, this is a long post. I think I might be getting better at surviving as a conscious eater in restaurant situations. (I hesitate to use the word "dieter", mostly for semantic reasons), but one thing I could still use work on is reacting to the grief I get from my dad when I don't eat everything on my plate. I'm 23, and yes, I still live at home, but it's only a stopover, and only for another month. I'm the only vegetarian in my family, so he finds cooking for me a challenge. I suppose his generation said to finish everything in front of you. I'm just trying to make healther portion sizes and assert some control over what goes into my body, but he sees that as a failing on his part as the chef.

He does seem to attach food with love and excessive pride, so I could take over the kitchen one night a week. But what about the other six? This question isn't even about him, because he's doing nothing wrong, it's just a feeling he gets. I admit that my late-night jogging after he goes to sleep makes me part of the problem. (Kind of the undoing of my former late-night bingeing. It just seems like the time of day to do something about it.) I hide many accomplishments in many walks of life because I doubt how long I'll have them. But how do you deal with loved ones who seem to be keeping a scorecard of what you eat?

 
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Old 07-27-2003, 07:54 PM   #2
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ah, this is a good one!!!

and, after agonizing over it myself for a very long time (also a parent in my situation...even though i am OUT of the house, for a LONG time now)....i have come to this conclusion....YOU MUST DO WHAT IS BEST FOR YOU!!!! if it hurts your fathers feelings, or takes it as a personal attack, thats his problem. he should be proud of his son for doing something good for himself! I hope you have talked to him and explained this to him. If not, its time to. Then, after that, there is nothing more you can do. You've said your peace, if your father choses not to hear it, then, in my opinion, he is disrespecting you. Therefore, no need to fear disrespecting him.


 
Old 07-28-2003, 11:51 PM   #3
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Part 2 on the same train of thought: we're going away for a 5-night vacation this week. And seeing how I'm still shy about revealing my dieting or exercising plans. I guess part of me still thinks the plans will fail, and I'll feel like I'm "starting my diet all over again" in a few months even though I've done really well for a couple of weeks now.

I think I'll just eat as well as anyone on vacation can, and just leave the exercise until I get back. But will I ever be thinking about it.

 
Old 07-29-2003, 06:35 AM   #4
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if you opt for the lower-fat foods, would anyone really notice?

if you go for 'a walk'..(maybe hit the gym while doing so), will anyone really notice?


 
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