HOW DO U LIVE FOR RIGHT NOW AND NOT TOMMOROW - Weight Loss Message Board

clairetha · 10-03-2003, 12:16 AM

Over the past weeks I have been helping my daughter prepare for homecoming at her school.She came home and told me that she is going to the homecoming queen.I was happy for her ofcourse but the first thing I thought about was my weight(saying to myself o lord am fat)this is a big event lots people will be there I dont like social events, especially when u see people that u haven seen in a while they be like boy clairetha have u put on weight but for my daughter sake i pulled myself together and put on a happy face.I said am going to buy me a pretty dress and am going to look my best.So the night of homecoming as I was getting dress I began to feel self-conscience my dress look as it could be just a little bigger but its to late now,when I arrived there was lots of people I was saying to my self I would do anything to be 55LBS lighter but tonight am not am 197LBs medium built 5"2tall so I sat down and felt bad but when my daughter walked down the red carpet and every body stood to their feet I felt so good she looked so beautiful I began to think I am missing precious moments that I will never get back because I dont like to be around people while am fat but I must stop thinking like that because I have already missed so much staying in the house.what people are going to have to realize is (no am not the clairetha that weighted 130LBs years ago I dont have that slim waiste anymore or 34(b) cup anymore But I am the clairetha that u use to call when u had problems,clairetha that can make u small also I have gave life to three beautiful children and No am not balming my weight on my children because its not their fault that am over weight but having children does demand alot from your body. The average women gain from 20 to 40 lbs during pregnancy if u dont lose all of the weight after birth then become pregnant again u are looking at another 20 to40 lbs thats how women become over weight I believe. but we cant put our life on hold just because we have gained weight we have children that want us to do things with them,play with them outside, go shoping.I dont like doing any of those things, but no more will i punish myself,going to live for today,life is short plus i am not getting any younger I dont want my life to be base on I mess my diet up I'll start tomorrow. I want to have a good life at 197lbs enjoy with the family ofcouse am not giving up on losing weight I still want to lose 55lbs but I cant put my life on hold until I lose 55lbs. Let me give u an example I gave birth in Nov 21,02 after giving birth I weighed 198lbs,I began to diet in Jan 03 I was so disguisted with my weight I didn't want to do nothing I did't want to go any where I was miserable. I start a diet mess up on a diet,start a diet messup,so I did began to exercise but the weight is very slow at coming off I dont know if its because I have had 3 C-setions and tied my tubes i dont know but I have not been to the movies,have not went dancing, have not partcipated in my children school,have not went out my my husband nothing until my daughter participated in the homecoming I had to go,I did realize how much time I have wasted in the house.so much time i have wasted with my children ALOT. but no more I am going to live for today not tomorrow.

suej1946 · 10-03-2003, 05:49 AM

Hi, your post made me feel so bad for you. Congratulations to your daughter you must be very proud of her. You will lose your weight. you just have to have the will to do it and you certainly sound like you do. Im sure that your daughter was very proud to have her mom there. Join us , there are a lot of different diets on here.
Im doing atkins. lost 19 lbs now. it will take awhile to lose the weight but we didnt put it on overnight.
let us here how you are doing and we are here to support you.
God Bless and take care.

chipmunkis · 10-03-2003, 07:28 AM

How wonderful for you that you have realized that you can't put life on the backburner until you lose the weight. As John Lennon said, "Life is what happens while you're busy making other plans". My MIL has the attitude of waiting til she loses weight to participate in life- she won't go anywhere or do anything untl she "gets skinny"- but she lays on the couch and watchings TV- meanwhile her husband has decide he is going to do stuff with or without her because he is tired of this. She is waiting for life to get better, but while she waits, it's passing her by. How sad.

[This message has been edited by chipmunkis (edited 10-03-2003).]

jennielynn · 10-03-2003, 08:50 AM

It's amazing how silly we feel when we begin to put our lives into perspective, isn't it??? you are entirely right; you can't and shouldn't put your life on hold until you lose the weight. Who knows if any one of us will be alive that long? sounds like a grusome question, but think about it. I could die tomorrow---you just never know.

Think of it this way; if you continue to do things outside the home while you are losing weight; everyone gets to see your transformation! What more could you ask for than a supportive group of friends cheering you on??? Life is to short to waste. I think that we should live life to it's fullest and while we need to make sure we are the healthiest that we can be; it shouldn't be a grueling process. i personally thank God each day that he has given me yet another day to improve upon myself and to enjoy with those around me. I'm hoping everyone else will do the same. It only takes a minute and no one even has to know that you're doing it!

I know that you can do this Clairetha! Just knowing that you care so much about your family shows the strength within you. It may not happen overnight but it will happen! Being 200 pounds or 130 pounds.......those numbers don't change who Clairetha is! You are still the same compassionate, caring, loving person at any weight! When you reach your goal; those attributes will just be more tightly packaged!!!!LOL Never, ever let yourself believe that being overweight means you're less of a person. I've actually found it to be the opposite among my friends. The overweight ones tend to be more outgoing, friendly, etc. Some of the skinny ones are so snobby it's unbelievable. They are not true friends! I often have thought to myself that I'd rather spend the rest of my life overweight than to turn into a person like that!

jen

usaswimmom · 10-03-2003, 07:46 PM

I am so happy for you that you have decided to make this decision. I know how you feel. I have three kids and it makes me very self concious to go to school events and extra curricular activities. I want so badly to participat but I am so worked up on how I think people perceive me that I forget the real reason I am here. I decided to take charge and started the body flex breathing and then incorporated the plus system with that. I have only been doing for a few days now so I have no results other than I feel physically better, more energy and get up and go. I still feel as big as the side of a barn when I look in the mirror but I just feel better inside. I thnk it was the actual decision to do somthing. It terribly effects our self esteem when we feel bad about ourselves. I feel like if I look good then people will listen to what I have to say. I have to keep reminding myself "who cares what they think" they are no better than me, thinner maybe but no better. I do this for me. I want to be around to see those important mile stones for my kids and I want to feel good on the inside. Hope this helps You are not in this boat alone. I am here.
Laura