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Old 08-14-2006, 11:12 PM   #1
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Join Date: Jun 2003
Posts: 29
riley39 HB User
My Girlfriend and Her Troubles

Hi everyone,

My girlfriend and I have been dating for 2 1/3 years now. She has a weight problem and at times gets VERY depressed because of it. She's probably about 5'7" and anywhere between 225-245 (i don't know specifics but i remember about a year ago she said she was about 225, then recently said she gained more).

The thing with my girlfriend is that she doesn't look like her weight at all, and I always tell her that when she gets really down on herself. I've tried so many things to help her, too. We tried the food-every-three-hours diet, we tried the calorie monitoring diet, we hiked, swam (still swim about three times a week but because it's fun, not for exercise reasons) and she even bought a set of aerobics videos and tried them out for about a week, hurt her back and won't do them anymore because she's scared she'll get hurt again. The diets all came to a quick end because she will be very, VERY depressed because of her weight and compelled to get in shape one moment, but then she'll gradually start to treat herself to the things that she SHOULDN'T be eating until she goes back to how it all was before the diet. Then she gives up hope for a few months until the cycle repeats.

I think a big contributer to her lack of interest in continuing a diet is the atmosphere at her house. They always seem to have cabinets full of junk food and eat a lot of fast food.

I just want her to be more self-confident and not so depressed, so what are the best dieting options and what can I do to help her out and motivate her to stick with a diet/routine? It's SO hard to talk to her about it because she always gets mad and says she doesn't want to talk about it, but I get really worried. So any help with that would be much appreciated, too, haha.

Thanks in advance,
- Riley

 
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Old 08-15-2006, 08:51 AM   #2
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Join Date: Aug 2006
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kkecu2006 HB User
Re: My Girlfriend and Her Troubles

Helloooooooooo! First of all...she has one of the best tools of losing weight right beside her...YOU! Having someone supportive and positive when things get hard is so important. Secondly, unfortunately she has to make the decision for herself. It sounds to me that she really wants to lose weight but sees such an uphill climb to the body she wants, that it seems almost impossible. But it isn't.

I just joined this board, but I've lost 120lbs through good old fashion diet and exercise...god help me. I am 27 years old and about 5'6...I got up to 300lbs at one point...so I know how dam* hard it is to look at what you have in front of you.

You can find lots and lots of great information on these boards. The thing that clicked for me was the silly phrase "investing in myself." I know I heard it somewhere, but I don't remember where. I just kind of realized that we (to our immediate knowledge) only live one time. I feel like a big part of my life was, I don't want to say wasted, but a big part of my brain was invested on what I COULD be one day...not what I was doing each day to get there.

I began keeping a journal of exercise...not food...I am terrible at that. I bought a cheap treadmill and walked 20 minutes after dinner. That's it. And then I began to add time and challenge myself. It really became MY time. My time to think and feel like this is MY thing. I got up to doing at least 45 minutes a day and got some 5 lb weights and began a little strength training. I then cut out soda...with the exception of a couple of diet sodas a month. I drink 100oz of water everyday, and I added fiber to my diet and lowered my fat. Diets don't work for everyone...but what worked for me was eating over 30 grams of fiber and under 20 grams of fat. It may be unconventional...but I did it and have kept the weight off for two years. I still have a little ways to go....but I have never gained. The thing is...I could have the occasional fat free ice cream or snack. I could have sandwiches, ummy meals, and pasta. I made it with organic whole grain pasta. I have lots of other trick that I would love to share.


As soon as the weight began to come off...that was the biggest motivation! You shoudl encourage her to come to this website and just begin to read. People have real struggles and real triumphs. She is not alone...we have all been there and she deserves to live the life she's dreamed. We can't always control the money we make, or what happens to us in our lives...but we CAN control our weight...it just takes time.

Rock it out...and keep being that supportive person you are...it will help her so much when she is at her lowest.

Kelly

 
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