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Old 07-09-2008, 12:26 PM   #1
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thewayiwas HB User
I knew it was bad...but this bad??

I am really overweight, as a matter of fact. My BMI reads Obese nd a little over. 3 Years ago I wasnt like this. I was my ideal weight, I met the love of my life. We then had two children. Well, now three years later he looks up at me and calls me fat? He says he is worried about my health and that he wants me to lose weight for me and not for him. I know I have gained quite a bit of weight but I guess never realized how much until he said that to me and I started checking around to figure out BMI and stuff like that. Now I am too depressed to move most of the time, I dont wanna get up and go to my job which I previously loved. I dont have energy anymore. I have tried several weight loss systems, dieticians, diet pills, meal replacements. Nothing seems to work. I know my boyfriend is not being mean and that he really is worried, and I know that he loves me. He just doesnt want to see me get some of these realy bad heart related health problems becuase of my weight. I remember before I gained it we were so happy and so in love and did everything together. Does anyone have any suggestions for me? I just wanna be the way I was.

 
Old 07-09-2008, 02:20 PM   #2
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pinkpixies HB User
Re: I knew it was bad...but this bad??

How much do you exercise? Weight loss is really less about food and more about being active.

 
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Old 07-09-2008, 04:55 PM   #3
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Re: I knew it was bad...but this bad??

You've had 2 children in 3 years? How much of this weight was gained through the pregnancies? Did you get a chance to get your weight off before you had the second child?

The main advise I'd offer is to accept the fact that it's not going to be fixed overnight. That's hard. But if it's taken you 3 years to get where you are,
give yourself 18 months to fix the problem. And for the first month, try conscious eating. Get a note book and do nothing else but 1) record your starting weight, 2) write down each bite of food you eat and each consciously. Like you said in not noticing your weight creeping on, it really makes a difference when you take a minute to think about what you are eating and record it so you remember. Eat when you are hungry and make the best choices you can from what's available. Make it as simple for yourself as you can and build better habits back.

Then, at the end of that first month, check your weight again.

Give yourself just that one month and see how it goes. Let's say you are down 7 pounds at the end of the month. That doesn't seem like much and if you think small, you may get depressed and quit. But if you look at the big picture? In 18 months that would be 126 pounds. Don't even know if you need to lose any where near that much but if you do, you'd be there.

Don't be down on yourself. Be proud that you are now looking to fix the problem. If you decide to go this route, let people know so they understand you are making the right choices for your life, not for a short term diet and get their support. If you've just gained this weight in the past few years, you can win this battle and get it back off. You really can.

 
Old 07-10-2008, 06:55 AM   #4
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Thumbs up Re: I knew it was bad...but this bad??

This is going to be a long post but I know how I felt when I started on this life change. I hope sharing with you will be encouraging.

I have lost more than 50 pounds. I have never lost more than 3/4 pound a week. Doesn't sound like much but that is more than 12 pounds a year. If you lose weight slowly it is more likely to stay off because it is a change in eating patterns and not a "trick". Find a sensible eating plan. Search the internet. for .gov or .edu sites for the best recommendations. This is a good site to check out: [url]www.tufts.edu/med/ebcam/nutrition/dietaryAdvice.html[/url]
Search around on it and I am sure you will find information that guide you to a healthy way to lose weight and get healthy. A true healthy eating plan is not only for you but everyone in your home. That way you don't feel "different or punished".

Every MD I know recommends walking and that doesn't cost anything. Exercise equipment is something you either use it or it just takes up space. You can find good used equipment. New equipment is usually a bargain in January because of the "New Year's Resolutions". Before you buy research the different styles and rating on service. Being able to get it repaired is my number one concern now. I started my habit with a with a treadmill.

I have horrible knees and I was told walking was putting too much pressure on my knees and I should consider an elliptical or a recumbent bike. A new recumbent will cost about $300. Ellipticals are expensive. You will find the rating tell you a good elliptical will cost about $1000. Be very careful if you buy an elliptical. Most of the ellipticals sold are actually horizontal steppers and do not relive the stress on your joints. Make sure it has a true elliptical orbit.

30 minutes of exercise daily is part of my life style now. Don't think I just out of bed in the morning and shout "Oh boy it's time to exercise!" I compare my exercise habit to brushing my teeth. It's not something I really get excited about but if I don't brush it feels odd. It will probably take you 8-10 weeks to develop the exercise habit. My elliptical is next my bed and I watch DVD's while I ride. The bike is in the living room. I don't miss anything or feel left out that way.

I'm not going to wish you "GoodLuck" but I do hope you have a "Happy Healthy Life"
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Last edited by lthomas; 07-10-2008 at 06:58 AM.

 
Old 07-10-2008, 02:33 PM   #5
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Re: I knew it was bad...but this bad??

I'm sorry that he hurt your feelings about this, but I'm SURE he was only trying to help. Of course, subjects like this are always touchy.

I highly recommend a good exercise routine. I struggled with depression in the past too and exercise was honestly what helped me most! I gained a lot of confidence, energy, and let out stress during exercise. YOu can always do something easy to start off, like walking. It will probably your mood greatly AND get you in shape.

Don't make any huge drastic changes in your diet. I've tried meal replacements too and fancy "diets" that didn't work or only temporarily worked. Instead, just try to eat well balanced meals with lean protein, low glycemic carbs (not too many processed, white carbs), and plenty of fruits and veggies. I know I don't eat perfectly... I can't give up my caffeine! Just try making small changes so it's easier to stick with.

The hardest part is getting started, but keep in mind that eating right and exercise will give you MORE energy with time and will make you happier! Maybe you can give yourself little rewards for making the effort. After a week of good workouts, I'd do little things like ******** lots of new music on my ipod to use for my workouts or buy some new workout clothes. I didn't reward myself based on weight loss or I'd feel guilty if I didn't lose any. Just stay positive, put in the effort, and I know you can do it!

 
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