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Old 06-18-2002, 02:57 PM   #1
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Join Date: Apr 2001
Location: California
Posts: 51
vjc715 HB User
Self Sabotage - Please help!

I hope someone can provide some insight. I am 5'2 140lbs...i want to be 100lbs. Most of my unhappiness is based around my weight...YET, I sabotage my possible success. I cry about my weight, I feel a deep hurt because I envy the looks of others, I joined a gym (but can't find the energy or enthusiasm to go), and ready for this....
today I ate 2 cheesburgers, a chicken pita and a Big Mac from McDonalds. Because of the guilt afterwards, I threw it all up.

What finally was the last straw that put you on the RIGHT track to weight loss? Where did you finally fine the motivation? Thanks so much in advance!

 
Old 06-18-2002, 04:35 PM   #2
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Join Date: Jun 2002
Location: Chicago, IL, USA
Posts: 166
justink80 HB User
Re: Self Sabotage - Please help!

First, it sounds like you may have an eating disorder. Throwing up food for any reason (besides naturally) is a serious problem.

I've lost about 17 pounds in the last ten weeks. I am motivated by a variety of reasons:

1.) Eating healthy and exercising regularly makes me feel better

2.) I see definite results when I look at myself, especially considering I am not exactly "overweight" but out of shape

3.) I want to be in the best health possible.

4.) Once a week I allow myself to "cheat", so it makes it much easier to eat healthy on the other 6 days.

5.) People notice that I have lost weight, so that motivates me even more.

The first reason should be everyone's main reason why they want to lose weight. It's the only way you'll make the change that is required if you intend to keep the weight off.

 
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Old 07-08-2002, 11:23 AM   #3
 
Join Date: Jul 2002
Location: Pueblo, CO. 81001
Posts: 0
Amy Reser HB User
Re: Self Sabotage - Please help!

<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by vjc715:
<B>I hope someone can provide some insight. I am 5'2 140lbs...i want to be 100lbs. Most of my unhappiness is based around my weight...YET, I sabotage my possible success. I cry about my weight, I feel a deep hurt because I envy the looks of others, I joined a gym (but can't find the energy or enthusiasm to go), and ready for this....
today I ate 2 cheesburgers, a chicken pita and a Big Mac from McDonalds. Because of the guilt afterwards, I threw it all up.

What finally was the last straw that put you on the RIGHT track to weight loss? Where did you finally fine the motivation? Thanks so much in advance!</B><HR></BLOCKQUOTE>

Vjc, do you think there could be an underlying reason for your inability to take the weight off? I have two examples for you. One, it could just be that years of societal conditioning have given you such a negative impression of yourself that you have sunk into depression, therefore lowering your levels of Seratonin. Seratonin is needed to function normally, otherwise you have very low levels of energy so that you don't want to exercise, clean, etc. I have a friend who was like that. She finally went to Weight Watchers and is very thin now, but she still has major problems with her self image. If so, you can see a therpist and get medication, or you can first try either 5-HTP or Sam-e. Both are sold over the counter.

Another example is my problem, though I think it is getting better. I was raped and molested by my father and a religious cult as a child, and ever since then, I have had such a negative image of myself and my sexuality. I was basically told that, being a girl, that was the only thing I was good for. Because of this, I gained weight to protect myself against being desirable to men. Their attention (catcalls, whistling, dating, etc.) caused me to feel ashamed of myself. Whenever my mom or grandmother would make any kind of reference to relationships with men (with me), I would feel ashamed and dirty. At the same time though, I would be jealous of my friend for getting attention now that she is thin, and I still want romantic attention from men (right up to the point where they actually return it.) I guess I want it, but I can't quite handle it. It has been better lately because of therapy, and I'm finding that I don't overeat as much as I used to, and my cravings are getting less and less every day.
These are two likely reasons for the weight problem. With the first one, you just need to realize that it is society that has a problem, not you. Society is constantly telling us that we need to be thin, sexy, and beautiful while selling us Ho'Ho's, Twinkies, and sugary sodas (or diet forms that are pretty much poisonous). The best thing is to find the best way to get a healthy body, not just a slim body. But if you are depressed, you need to deal with the reason behind the depression first, otherwise, you will continue to sabotage yourself subconsciously. If it is the second reason, you have more trouble, because you have that, and societal conditioning on top of it. It is a far more common reason for weight problems than most people know. Sorry for the long post.

 
Old 07-09-2002, 02:57 PM   #4
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Join Date: Apr 2001
Location: California
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vjc715 HB User
Re: Self Sabotage - Please help!

Thank you soo much for the responses and the guidance!


Amy - OH MY GOODNESS! I think your post hit me like a ton of bricks!!! More than I think I wanted to admit! With the exception of the sexual abuse, you touch upon alot of feelings! Thank you for your honesty! Thank you for taking the time to reply to me! You opened my eyes to something I knew, but avoided believing!
thank you - thank you - thank you!!!

 
Old 07-09-2002, 07:41 PM   #5
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Join Date: May 2002
Location: IL
Posts: 27
robertl HB User
Re: Self Sabotage - Please help!

The hardest part is starting. Once you've made a decision to start and a commitment to stay with it, you will begin seeing results in a week, two tops. Once you see results, it will help motivate you to stay on track. Sometimes starting is a forced on you, and not an option. Please dont let it get to that point.

I had a severe leg infection that sent me to the hospital where they told me besides the infection, my BP was high and I was borderline obese. I felt horrible and depressed becuase these were things within my control, things I could have done something about over the course of the past. The Doctor believed I got the infection becuase of bad leg circulation, because I was obese. At that moment my first goal was to get rid of the infection, then I swore I would get down to a normal weight and get healthy. It took almost 2 months for the infection to clear up (thankfully), but that was my wakeup call. I wasn't going to let something more severe tell me I needed to lose weight NOW. Three months later, I'm down 55 pounds. I still have weight to go, but I'm healthier and feel like a new person. I am briskly walking 25 miles per week where 3 months ago I could barely walk down the block. When you feel that motivation, nothing will stop you and you will be motivated to continue.

You can do it also. You're young, don't wait until something bad happens to you. Take action NOW. I wish I would have 10 years ago. Get motivated to start and do it when YOU feel it's time. Give it 2 weeks and see the results. Once you see results, you'll be motivated by the positive comments and how you look. It will help you stick with it. Sorry for the boring story, but you asked. Hope this helps! Good luck.

 
Old 07-10-2002, 09:56 AM   #6
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Join Date: Apr 2001
Location: California
Posts: 51
vjc715 HB User
Re: Self Sabotage - Please help!

Thank you sooo much Robert! I hope you are doing well now! I just need to get focused and stop feeling sorry for myself! I want the weight to go far away...yet haven't wanted to put forth the effort. And what effort I have put forth has not been the best way. (diet pills, purging, etc....)

thanks again! i'm originally from illinois!!!!! ;-)

 
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