My husband and I have been married almost 10 years. I am 29 and he is 32. The "baby bug" hit me very hard this year. Up to this point I had absolutely NO interest whatsoever in having a child. Now....it's all I can think about!!!
The problem is I am scared out of my skull. I don't have a support system for these kinds of thoughts other than the women I work with.
And that is why I'm so scared! Because of the multiple pregnancies/deliveries we've had in our office the last few years EVERY SINGLE ONE has been a terrible experience for each woman. One had a Downs/liver failure/toxoplasmosis pregnancy which had to be terminated at 6 months. One was told not to have children, got pregnant, delivered a boy 7ish months early who has CP, another woman has a daughter with CP, one delivered 10 weeks early, and the latest was a good friend of mine whose placenta separated and had an emx c section almost loosing her daughter. I can go on and on and on....
I am genuinely TERRIFIED that this will happen to me. My husband, who has been a pro-child person from the start is so excited, I've never seen him more excited in our entire relationship, at the thought of being a father. He keeps scolding me that I am being irrational and everything will be FINE. Stop thinking about it he says! HAHA! But I can't help being so scared because all I am surrounded by are women who have had or are having the worst experiences of their lives!!!!
I know that delivery is not all roses and fairies but I have this idea of an exciting, intense time with a classic vaginal delivery with a resulting healthy child. And it seems like more and more all I am experiencing are terrifying stories and nightmare experiences.
Is there somewhere I can go or something I can read that will help me with these fears? Is there anyone out there that has and a NORMAL pregnancy or delivery? Because I'm certainly not in an area that seems to be able to do that....
My cousin had a reasonably good pregnancy, and now has a fantastic baby, and is expection her second this summer.
I can't promise you that everything will be perfect, but the odds are in your favor, and there are things you can do to make them even better. Read up on how to improve your health before conceiving, that might help.
It really does sound like several women you know have had some extraordinary bad luck, but that's not at all usual, especially at your age, if you are in decent health right now.