I recently searched the net about 'uneven breasts', and found this forum. When i realised my breasts were uneven, i felt incredibly ashamed and angry, and still do.
I'm 29 and I've never had a relationship, mostly due to the enormous fear of rejection when a man would see me naked. I've been with men, but none i have actually cared about. There are other issues as well, but that has been my main problem.
Although i stuff the bra cup for the smaller one, i am still self-conscious, which in turn affects the clothes i buy, and my posture, and sometimes how i present myself. And i'm stand-offish too, i don't hug people as much as i would like to.
I read here entries from women who do have partners and haven't let their uneven breasts hinder their life - I'd like some advice from them. I know i need to accept myself the way i am, but that's hard to do.
Mine have been uneven pretty much my whole life. I'm in my mid-30s now. At first I was upset, too, but then I just put up with it. I've had 7 long-term boyfriends, none of whom cared or hardly even noticed. They didn't make me feel bad about it or anything. Even guys who I was casually seeing didn't seem to care, either.
My left is a whole cup size larger than my right, and mine are big, like 44H size. So I'm self conscious about them being so huge anyway. But I've realized that people don't seem to pay attention to it the way that I do and that has helped me deal with it.
All I can tell you is, while you see it as a huge problem and you think it's bad, chances are that no one else is going to notice. Or if they do, it's not like they will hassle you about it. I wouldn't allow it to interfere with your ability to have a relationship with someone. When a guy really loves you, that's not something that he cares about because it's all about the whole you, not just your boobs. But if you ever have a guy that makes snarky comments about it, you can just tell him to get lost and realize that he is too immature to be with you.
Hi nailpolish, and welcome to the healthboards. We are here to help!
I hope I can help you by sharing some facts about uneven breast size...It is perfectly normal, in fact there are very few of us who have perfectly even breasts!
Just as all other features we have on both sides of our bodies, they are all asymmetrical. That goes for the eyes, the lips, the ears the arms, legs, breasts and even the testicles. Of course, the differences can range from very tiny to very large, all within the "normal" range.
Next time you are in a large group of people, picture them all naked...with all their uneven parts flapping around. I hope that mental image is enough to change your perception a little bit about your own differences. We are perfect in our own imperfection, isn't that wonderful?
By being just like you are, you are perfect too. Now the secret is to let yourself free from your own misconceptions about your breasts. One wonderful quality about the men who love us is that they are most aware of the vast differences between woman's bodies, and they love us anyway! There is so much more to both men and women than their bodies. Although the media wants to show us the "perfect" bodies, that is not reality.
Of course, after saying all that, I too have very uneven breasts. I wish you the best...you are just fine like you are.
Nailpolish, I totally feel your pain. I recently turned 30 and since I develped by breast have been very noticably uneven lefty was a full A cup and righty a AA. So I had double the issues not only were they very uneven but they were extremely small. I was so self-concious that I hardly ever let anyone see them including my husband. I thought the older I got the less I would care but it actually got worst. To be honest though no one I have dated has ever really cared or said anything even when I mentioned it. My husband would constantly tell me how perfect he thought I was which of course I never believed.
Three weeks ago today I had breast augmentation surgery to make them bigger and even. So after paying 4 grand for what I thought would be perfect boobies I learned that my surgeon put the same cc amount in each breast so although my breasts are bigger they are still a cup size different. My husband can't tell oh but I can and am still depressed about it I'm hoping that once they finish dropping all the way the difference won't be as noticalbe as it is right now.
I know I'm not really much help to you because even at 30 I have yet to learn to live with the difference and ended up resorting to surgery to correct it, well actually the surgery was mainly to correct the size, size was a far greater issue to me but the size difference was of importance too which I was very clear about before sugery. It does help to know that so many women are uneven and both of us are from alone in that. But, one thing I can say that may help you is that most guys really don't care and hardly notice what I thought was painfully obvious, my husband never saw it even when I showed him the size difference he just couldn't see it (or at least that's what he said) and I'm talking having a little boob on one side and nothing on the other totally flat just nipple. So now I have to learn to live with $4000 worth of uneven boobs.
I've noticed a slight difference in my attitude to my breasts in the past week or so, which is really really good. Still have a way to go though.
Not that i'm even dating a man at the moment, but what has crossed my mind now, is the conversation when telling/revealing to a man about my breasts. Maybe because i haven't been in love, and haven't opened up emotionally to a man, i find it difficult to imagine a man being able to accept my body as it is? I find it foreign to even consider than a man wouldn't notice, when they are most looking forward to seeing and touching breasts.
The rest of my body is quite curvy, and i feel that i get judged by my body, and that since men are attracted to women first visually and then emotionally, that a man would feel fooled or lied to that my body isn't as it seems... typing that makes it all sound quite ridiculous, hey
i have un even breasts not a big difference but my boyfriend loves me just the way i am and you will find a true gentleman some day. if they are immature about stuff like sizes of breasts they are not worth time of day and plus they probably aren't perfect either. we only live once and remember that in life theres so much stuff that we all stress about and it makes us let life pass us by when we don't take a chance or an opportunity. live life to the full. be proud. love you first. also breast size is nothing compared to a great personality and kind caring nature which is more important in a person than breast size in mens case penis size as they worry about that too. when i was insecure about myself i said to myself oneday ''i'm not fat, i'm not thin, not that any of that matters BUT i am just as much worthy of love, a relationship and sexy just as much as super models etc'' same with breasts tell yourself ''breasts are just breasts, that doesn't make me less worthy than anybody else''. hope this helps. end of the day right, breasts are just skin and muscle. its real health and real happiness and our personalitys that truly should matter. lifes way too short. also i know this may sound morbid but there is horrible things that happen in life like people suffering with cancer and dying, diseases, murders etc so it goes to show that breast sizes are such a mild problem compared. appreciate what you have because remember there is far worse out there. hope all this helps. was worth a try. just wanted to help you see things in another light. take care x
Last edited by cryingforever; 11-01-2010 at 11:18 PM.