Posted by Fiona
on November 18, 2000 at 08:45:20:
In Reply to: I like to be prepared for the worst. posted by Darina on June 23, 2000 at 13:02:58:
My father, aged 53, died of cancer a few months ago. He had been diagnosed a little under a year earlier, so we had a little time to prepare for his impending death. However, my very limited experiences with cancer death (mostly anecdotal) led me to believe that we would know well in advance that he was approaching the final stages. This was not the case with my dad. On his final day he went for a walk, wrote an email, read the paper, and then started to fall asleep on the couch. When he fell asleep my mum heard, for the first time, the chest rattle. She immediately called the doctor, who came to the house and told us he was now in the final stages. Within 3 hours he was dead. Those 3 hours gave the family just enough time to all get home and say goodbye. Unfortunately he was never conscious again, so all our goodbyes were to him only, he could not reiterate them to us. I would now advise anyone not to take cancer death for granted, it can happen very quickly, and rob you of the opportunity to say those final goodbyes.
On May 11, 2000 my husband found out he has lung cancer. He is 54 and does not want to go through the Chemo, which the doctor said would not cure him anyway. It would only prolong his life a little more. I respect his decision however hard that will be for me. He began having a severe cough before the cancer diagnosis and had gotten worse. Right now he tires very easily and his appetite is not good. We have Hospice and the nurse comes ones a week checking pulse and blood pressure(no help). His doctors would give us only 2-6 months time limit without treatment. I like to be prepared for the worst. I was hoping some of you that have experienced this terrible loss could help me. What should I expect? Is there anything I should do? I guess I just needed someone else to hear theirs story. I know there is nothing left to do but pray and hope that he won't have to suffer too much or to long. If anyone has any experiences to share, I would appreciate it. Thanks