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Re: too much

Re: too much

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Posted by Tammy on November 17, 1999 at 07:21:02:

In Reply to: too much posted by G on November 17, 1999 at 03:37:40:

: Hello. Have been taking care of my grandma off and on the last year since her bypass surgery. It took her 3 months of recovery, because she is diabetic and gained some pretty awful wounds. She REFUSED to go to cardiac rehab after that and then continued to go against doctors orders. Grant it, she had a quack for a doctor until this week. This time, she just got out of a 5 week stay in hospital/nursing home and is in wheel chair with homehealth to get her strenght up. She has been home 1 week and already sent the Physical Therapist away twice. She lives next door to us. I live with my family and my parents. My parents are trying to be of help, but when it comes to the day to day things, she is nasty to my mom. They have their own dynamics of their relationship to work out. The problem is...I live with both these womem, love them both, and am in the middle of their ugly situation. My mom is taking care of gmas finances, health care, etc., and gma resents this. Gma is 70 and just now starting to go mentally, but only a slight bit. She is dealing with all these live changes, not working anymore, wheelchair for now, etc.. Mom isn't too sympathetic, BUT we have to be firm with gma or she will just runover us and con us. VERY CONFUSING situation. I have 2 kids, 13 and 2, and am also a full time student in a long term relationship that is probably ending for other problems. To make matters more hectic, I live with my parents and my dad is having surgery on his neck in the next 2 weeks and will need help also for awhile. I DON'T MIND DOING ALL OF THIS...my grandma has done many things for me. What I don't like is the abusive behavior on both hers and my mothers sides. I know my grandma will be dead in a year, according to medical people, and I want to be able to say I did everything I could. IT is all these other factors with everything I guess. Can anyone understand? Do I make since?

IT SOUNDS TO ME THAT YOUR MOM IS STRESSED WITH HAVING TO DEAL WITH GRANDMA AND HER HUSBAND'S UP COMING SURGERY. AND YOUR GRANDMA IS BITTER WITH THE MEDICAL CHANGES THAT HAS BEEN HANDED TO HER. I THINK ALL YOU CAN REALLY DO IS TELL G'MA SHE HAS TO LET THE P.T. HELP HER AND DO THE BEST YOU CAN DO. CHANGES IN LIFE ARE NOT ALWAYS PLEASENT AND WE MUST DEAL WITH WHAT WE ARE GIVEN. DO NOT OVER EXTEND YOURSELF WHERE YOU ARE NEGLECTING YOUR OWN KIDS. I KNOW I HAVE FROM TIME TO TIME DONE THIS AND IT IS NOT WORTH THE ADDED STRAIN ON YOU. GOOD LUCK TO YOUR DAD AND YOU ARE A SAINT TO BE HELPING OUT WITH THIS ALL. TAKE CARE OF YOUR NEEDS AS WELL!!!!


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