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Posted by Weeping Referee on September 28, 2000 at 15:53:47:
I need some advice from the users out there. I'm the niece of a my aunt the caregiver to my grandmother. I'm in the situation that my aunt needs support. she has a boyfriend which has been very loyal and being there for her as needed. However there is such a thing as family member that is the best suport you can get. That is me.. Thing is I'm in the middle of a kind of disagreement. My mom and my aunt have not spoken in a year and swore never to speak again because of a big argument that happened over another family member that died and my thought that my my aunt had not shown enough respect to my other aunt that had past away last year in march.Anyways, my mother wanted my grandmother to side with her but my aunt is the one that takes care of all of my grandmas needs mom has her life 25 miles away and wants to tell my aunt what to do since my aunt is 20 yrs younger than her. Well granma 9 months agao was found with colon cancer. She has gone through her radiation and chemo and doing much better but she had an emergency last night and my aunt called me at work to let me know what was going on cause i want to know.
Well this is the part I need advice on.. My mother asks me how is granma doing she wants to know how she is doing but gets mad at me and says that I'm being manipulated when my aunt calls me and tells me how is grandma is feeling .. She starts swearing and saying hope she dies so that I wont be in contacted any more and all kinds of horible htings.. that hurts me I like wishing I had the disease and that way i could choose whom I would want to contact me or not. I need someway some how to tell my mother that not to ask me about grandma cause she doens't want to hear about her cause she will start cursing her out and to me even thugh she is the one asking me?? but I need to do this without disrespecting my mother.. My grandma hasn't spoken tomy mom for a year and she is fine with that.. cause she says that my mom would upset her very much when she did talk to her. Please help me get mom off my back without upsetting or disrespecting my mother please...
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