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Please don't be so quick to judge - support goes two ways

Please don't be so quick to judge - support goes two ways

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Posted by Voice of Reason on October 11, 2000 at 14:28:52:

In Reply to: no sympathy there posted by orchid on October 11, 2000 at 00:21:47:

It does indeed happen to more people than you think. But please think for a moment, just because you are ready to talk about it, doesn't mean that shes ready to talk about it.

I don't think she was trying to one-up you. I think that it was probably not possible for her to offer you support without bringing her own terrible memories to the front of her mind. As her friend, please try to respect this. You are getting support from a professional therapist, but if she never has then she probably is a little intimidated by the fact that you can or you want to talk about it.

I know I sound like an old lady here but from experience I know that when people haven't seen each other for many months, it's best to keep the conversation very light (especially if you don't expect to see each other again for awhile).

Give her another chance - friends are too precious to give up on. Let her know that if she ever wants to talk about HER rape, then you are there for her, then quickly move on to something a little cheerier. She'll be glad to know that you are there for her.

Hope all goes well.


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