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To Tired : Welcome to the Real Truth

To Tired : Welcome to the Real Truth

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Posted by Dying Inside Out on November 30, 2000 at 01:50:39:

Hello Tired,

I've read your post called American Beauty. I am glad that you have realized such truths at a tender age. I see that you are very frustrated about not having someone to love. I think when we are missing something - we tend to focus on seeing all those around us that have what we are missing. In my case, I have very bad asyymtrical eyes. I tried correcting it with surgery only to make it look and feel much worse than it was before. Now everytime I watch TV, the movies, or people in public all I see are perfect natural symmetrical eyes while I feel like an outcast, a freak of nature that is trapped in an unwanted mass called my body. I am sure you feel the same in your own way.

I didn't have my first true girlfriend until junior year in college. Before then I was very focused on school and social activities. But after having a girlfriend I realized how meaningless and empty those activities were. Now I am single again at 32 and in the worse shape of my life. I feel physically disabled even though the pain is only around my eyes.

My advice is this: continue sharing your feelings, thoughts, and insights. Seek out and take a chance on someone, anyone you think may hit it off with you. You will be surprised if they find you attractive and forgiving on any shortcoming that you may have. Think of it this way. Let's say are now married to a wonderful girl. Will you love her any less if she one day had breast cancer? You may end up loving her more and wish she will get better and live her life out with you. If this is true, than as you can see physical appearance is only skin deep. It's the person inside that matters - once you get to know them. I know that is a cliche but it is a fact. People get older and uglier every day too with age. Does that make them less lovable? Right know you are too focused on having someone right now at this moment. The girl for you may not be here right now - maybe tomorrow, maybe next week, or next year. But if she does come along, I hope you will be prepared enough to show her your true self - the self that is content and self-accepting. It's not about confidence and pysching yourself up. It's about looking in the mirror and say this is who I am and this is the hand I have to play with in my life.

I know its hard when we are bombarded with Ricky Martins and Brad Pitts everywhere - but that is not reality - that is consumer preference. If every guy looked like that they wouldnt be of any value to marketers. We are not part of the mass market - we are individuals - and we have to see pass that and that everyone doesnt look and act like that.

Oh and your doubts about a personal God - perhaps so - but its hard to doubt that there is intelligence behind DNA, mathematical truths, and laws of nature. Of course none of this prove anything about the personal involvement of a creator with humans - but it does prove that there is some sort of intelligence in this universe at work....Maybe the western culture has been too influenced by Christianity and Roman and Greek philosophy over the centuries to think anymore of it than what it really is - that we are just plain life forms in the top food chain on earth - nothing more....



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