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Message
Posted by Lou Rizzo on March 07, 2000 at 23:00:55:

In Reply to: Re: In need of some information please. posted by LINDA ALEXANDER on January 05, 2000 at 15:10:03:

: : I have a little girl with downs.We didn't find out until she was born.My husband and I want to have another baby soon but I am so afraid.I know I would not be able to handle it if it had down syndrome too.It may sound selfish but I love my daughter and wouldn't trade her for anything.I am just so scared.Does anyone know the chance of having another w/trisomy 21. I would really appreciate the info.I really want more kids I just am so unsur

Dear Linda,
My wife and I have a child with a related type of chromosome disorder called partial trisomy 4q+. She is now 4 years old. I can understand your fear of having more children, I assume that your daughter is your only child. Our daughter is our fifth. All of our other children were born healthy with no medical problems. I feel that having the experience of being parents to our other kids helped us to better handle all of the medical problems that our youngest has experienced. I feel badly for you that you and your husband have had to face such a traumatic experience with your first child.
I also don't know how old your daughter is but I am assuming that she is fairly young. I would like to offer you some advice. First of all to allay your fears of having more children with Trisomy 21, have you talked with a genetic Dr.? A simple blood test done on both you and your husband could determine whether or not either of you are a carrier of a genetic disorder that may have been passed on. If that is not the case then this genetic counselor can explain the odds to you of having another similar problem. Secondly, luckily there is so much in the way of support groups and programs
available today to help you. I don't know where you live, but I am sure that it wouldn't be too difficult to locate some help with a minimal amount of time and effort. The most important thing that I feel you need to remember is that you are not alone and there are many people out there that would be willing to help you. Don't ever give up hope. Be thankful for the child that you have and realize that things could always be worse. Kids with Downs syndrome today have so much available to them to help them live meaningful lives. Are you involved in any early intervention programs? I hope that
my message to you doesn't seem insensitive. I know you've probably heard the old line that God only gives these special kids to special people, but it is true. You and your husband are very lucky to have this beautiful child and believe me it will get better.
Sincerely,
Lou

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