Posted by jbrules
on September 12, 2000 at 22:10:13:
Hi Im a 41 yr old woman. since the age of 19 I have suffered with one form of eating disorder or another.
My question is this I go well for a while then something just want let me go and I start feeling guilty about about my wieght which is quite heavy now these days compared to how I use to be a few years ago. Generally I try and talk to myself that being over weight alittle doesnt matter when all my life I have watched every little piece of food and fat that I put in my mouth. But I hate to look at myself in the mirror but now take some comfort that being over 40 hey who am I suppose to be impressing. I know my husband loves me the way I am, he never says otherwise.
But why why why want these feelings of guild go away. Why do I still sometimes often feel the need to stick my fingers down my thoat, which I do. Why carnt I just be happy the way I am fat or thin. jan