Posted by Kristina
on September 28, 2000 at 19:11:48:
You just have to TRUST me! People, those of you who have not conquered this yet do not realize what it can do! My life is totally wrecked! My teachers, counsellors, friends, parents, doctors, etc. now just look at me as "a sick, mental nutcase" as my dear father put it.
Don't you hate it when people talk to you artificialy? Well now thats what I get all the time. My friends now all avoid me and if I come up to them and say hi casually they either pretend like they didn't hear me or they say "hi" like they are talking to a 5 month old. If it gets really bad, they stick you in a mental hospital, put a gastric tube down your throat, and force feed you through that and IVs and it can take months. Its not worth it. There are other ways to get skinny. It's not everything. No words are powerful enough for me to say what I really want to express.
Please think twice about this! It's really not smart! I wish I could reach out to all of you and hold you all close and cry with you and tell you that whatever happens it will be ok; but it wont be if you keep hurting yourself like this. I understand the fact that you want to be skinny but you know it....deep inside you are screaming, "HELP! I don't want to die! Please someone tell someone for me or else I don't know what will happen!"
Think about the logic here, if there is any: You starve yourself so excessively to be skinny that you die. Well, you cant be thought of as skinny if you are dead. Don't let this happen to you. It is totally and completely not worth it. You say, "Oh I'll only do this until point X. But at point X you say, oh, this is working really well, im going to keep doing this. I'll lose a few more lbs just so i dont gain it back. and then you dont stop. It is imperative that you DO stop!
I am posting this in a vain attempt to help people. I....don't know what more I can do. I hope this message has at least....HELPED you in some way, let you know that you are not all alone in the very least.
Think about how hungry you are. Go eat something. It'll make it feel better. Or even better, pick up the phone and call someone and tell them how you are feeling. Someone WILL listen! There are always people who care about you. That goes for everyone. I care about every single one of you.
Love, hugs, happiness, peace, and best wishes for all of you;
Kristina Emily D.