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Posted by Grace on August 14, 1999 at 16:23:59:

Hi. My name is Grace. I'm 15 and a half years old (I just got my permit today). From the outside, I look like an average person, I guess. I play soccer and the violin. I have a lot of friends, I'm always on the phone... but I'm bulemic. I've been bulemic since the summer of seventh grade. It's crazy, but whenever I look in the mirror, I see something different than the time before, and a lot of the time, it's bad. I love it when I wake up and see a pretty thin body, but those days come very far in between. On the other days, I exercise compulsively and weigh myself at least five times a day. This last week, I've been really busy with two a days for soccer (two practices a day, both of them two hours and fifteen minutes long), and I've been doing cardio-kickboxing for the past month or so. But when I just got on the scale, it said that I'd GAINED ten pounds in the past week. How? Now when I get off of the internet, I'll be off to the drug store to go get laxatives and the process will begin again. I'll starve myself, begin to eat, eat to much, gain weight, and then feel bad and start all over. Why does life have to be this way? I've told a few of my friends that I'm bulemic, but I also told them that I was going to a counselor. I don't even think that my parents know, even. I feel so alone, yet I know that I'm surrounded by people who care. I guess that's all. Thanks for listening. Love~Gracie

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