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Posted by T on June 29, 2000 at 11:42:28:

In Reply to: Re: What's with the tips????? posted by Your right on June 28, 2000 at 23:06:00:

I stand here with a brick wall in front of me. To the left, it's all I can see. To the right, it's all I can see. Can't crawl over, can't tunnel under. Where do I go? I need to stop fighting the fight. I need to accept the fact that I am struggling and deal with it there. I can't fight the fact that I'm struggling, it just makes it worse. I'm tired. It's so hard to explain to people. It's worse than the depression. Control, control, control... Every bite is hard. I know what I'm supposed to do. I just can't make my body cooperate. Some days, I'm OK. Others, it's harder. It's just really hard to see the other side of the wall. Is there "the other side"? Anyone? That's what gets me. I know I'm a LOT better than I used to be. That's comforting. That's pretty much all that's keeping me going now. Someday, I think I'll be able to do this. Not right now though. When I get depressed, that's the first thing to go. I have to be really careful. Babble, babble, babble, babble. I feel I'm taliking in circles without going anywhere. Enough for now...
T

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