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Posted by CHRISTINE on January 18, 2000 at 14:53:21:

Hi All,
First I would like to say I think it is great that everyone is so supportive for everyone at this message board. This is my first time here. I would like to introduce myself. My name is Christine and I will be 41 years old very soon. I have suffered with Chronic pain for over 5 years now. I have Degenerative Disc Disease and have had 5 major back surgerys. Two of them were spinal fusions. Last one was 2 years ago and was an Anterior/Posterior spinal fusion with donor bone. I now have two herniated discs and bone spur in my neck. This causes severe pain in arm, shoulder, neck and between shoulder blades. I have done the Physical therapy, injections, etc., but they have not helped. I am now faced with making a decision about having a fusion of the discs in my neck. I'm taking my time making this decision. Who wouldn't! I have been seeing a Pain Mangement specialist for two years now. I am on oramorph 60 mg 2x a day and oramorph 30 mg 1x a day. This medication is no longer giving me much relief. I have told my doctor this and it seems that my words fall on deaf ears. Last week for instance I had to have two injections in each hip for bursitis (so they say that it was bursitis), well I had a reaction and ended up in more pain and pain down both my legs. The pain was excruciating. I wanted someone to cut me from my waist down so I wouldn't have to feel this excruciating pain. So I called my pain mangement doctor and he said go take a hot bath and try to relax. And he said you are on the strongest medication and I cannot help you anymore than that. My husband I were shocked by his words. I ended up in the ER where I was given an injection of pain medication to try and get the pain back under some control. Thank God for their understanding. Tomorrow I see my Pain Mangement Doctor as it is time for my refill and I plan on talking to him about the way I feel physically, emotionally and what I think I need. My quality of life is not good and it is only getting worse. I try to always have a positive atttitude, but it can be hard to maintain sometimes. Thank God my husband is very supportive. I don't know what I would do without him. Since talking to my Pain Doctor is hard for me I have decided to write him a letter so I can say all I need to say without getting emotional. Because I tend to get teary when I am nervous when talking to authority figures when I need to talk about something I want or need. For me a doctor is an authority figure. (not sure why I get this way). But I would rather not get teary because then I know he won't listen to what I have to say or even take into consideration what I need to help me. I will admit that I get depressed sometimes but if I get teary in front of this doctor he says it is all depression. Does he ever understand that if ones quality of life due to chronic pain can cause depression! I do see a therapist, which I did on my own accord. I have even been to a hypnotherapist. Does anyone know how I can talk to my Doctor and get him to help me with getting different medication that will help me with my pain. I don't expect it to take it all away but I would like better relief so I can take back some of my life. I miss doing all the things I use to do. I once was a very active person. Now it's hard to do the simplest things. I miss playing with my grandchildren. I hate having to have help doing things I should be able to do for myself. I have asked my pain doctor for the morphine implant and he told me no because I don't have cancer. I didn't realize you had to have cancer in order to have this. Well according to another Doctor I heard on a radio show he said that people with Chronic Pain do not have to have cancer to be eligible to have the implant. I'm at a loss at what to do.

Oh and I also have been diagnosed with Fibromyalgia.

I'm sorry that this is so long. Guess I had more to vent that I thought I had. So forgive me for that. I would appreciate anyones advice.

God bless you all!

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