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ila. Excellent question!!!

ila. Excellent question!!!

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Posted by John V. on March 23, 2000 at 16:19:29:

ila,
You brought up a part of pain management that I think is never discussed enough. How do we mentally cope with the pain, and also the changes that we must make to cope in every day life? Maybe there is too much emphasis on the drugs? I porpbably shouldn't talk, because the drug part was a big concern of mine when I entered pain management.

Anyway. . .

I have been considered totally disabled since January of 1991. Having someone tell me that I can no longer work was an awfully hard experience. Especially when I was only 35 years old.
At first, I really denied, to myself, that I would be disabled for any long period of time. I thought that my body wouldn't have done that to me and that I was strong enough to get better and go back to work. Yeah, and I am Superman, too!
To be perfectly honest with you, I took to drinking. I pretty much stayed drunk for about 3-4 years. I would go to the bars and not come home for dayS on end. That shows you how well I was handling it.
When I was finally referred to a real pain management doctor, part of his program includes therapy with a psychologist. I had no choice whether to go or not. If I didn't go, I would not have gotten any more medication from that doctor. Obviously I went.
I am not going to say that the shrink got me to stop drinking. He didn't. He did help, though. He kind of forced me to accept my physical condition and my limitations. He also taught me a lot of excellent ways of dealing with chronic pain along with taking medication.
I am not saying that I have yet accepted all my limits, because I know that I really haven't. But, I really am learning to try to limit my activities. I am not even close to perfect and don't expect to be, anytime soon. I am still working on it, everyday.
Sometimes I wish that I was a bum. Almost everyone says that I have it made because I don't have to go to work anymore. HA!!!!!
If they only knew how much work it is to get through every day, I don't think they would think I was so lucky. If they knew how hard it is to tell a friend or relative that I can't help them to do something around their house, they wouldn't think I was so lucky. If they knew how embarrassed I feel when I need to use a handicapped parking space because that particular day, I can only walk a few steps, they wouldn't think I was so lucky.
But, ya know what? I may be living a life as a disabled person, but at least I am alive. I look at the alternative and I don't like what I see. So, I take each day as it comes, and I am thankful with what I do have, especially my family and friends. With them behind me, I will get through this. I don't have any other choice. At least, not any choice that I would take.

I hope that I let you know how I deal with it now. I don't go to bars anymore, and I very rarely drink any thing, anymore. It took me some time to get to where I am now, but I am better. I think any person is going to have a problem if he, or she, becomes disabled. That is also why I think that any apin management program should involved some type of professional counseling.
Once again, this is based on my experiences and is only my opinion. I have been know to be wrong, on a rare occassion :)

Take care and pain-free as possible,
John V.

PS By the way, could you explain what kia kaha means?
Please?





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