[ Back to Messages
Posted by John V
on March 26, 2000 at 19:05:41:
I might be reading this wrong, but I think that whether or not you should be put on antidepressents should be a docs decision. I don't think you should be worrying about it. If you need to then talk to a doc (counsler) and see what they say about it. Let them make the choices for you.
I went through a rehab in '87. The way I hear it is that any rehab has its strong points and weak points. The most important thing in a rehab is the people working there. Do they know what they are doing and do they care about the patients? After going through my rehab, I made a lot of visits to others. The state-run rehabs might not have been as nice as the private ones, but to really tell a good rehab, all you had to do was talk to the patients. Even if the rehab was state-run, I saw a lot of good being done. If the patient was serious about getting clean, then the surroundings meant very little. It was the quality of the staff that mattered and the patient's own desires that made any difference.
You sound like you have the desire. Like I said before, that is half the battle won already. How long you are there should matter NONE. You should be there as long as you feel you need to be and as long as the counslers and docs think you should be. I don't think that anyone can say beforehand how long you should be there. Don't worry about that! Take as much time as it takes.
Also, don't worry about people knowing that you are there. You never know, but you might just meet someone that you know who has a similiar problem that you do. Plus, you never know how many people that you think you are fooling, already are aware that you have a problem.
The important thing here is you and your health. To me, rehab was a very selfish experience. The way it worked for me is that I approached it selfishly. I was putting myself first, for once. If everyone got and stayed clean, fine. If not, okay too. But I was going to get better! And I did. Forget everything and everybody else. This is about YOU! Keep your focus there.
I used to take 60 mgs (and more) daily, of methadone. It had worked real well for me, but the doc wouldn't up the dose when it stopped being effective. It was decided a morphine pump would be implanted in me and it was done in November. It took a while, but I finally stopped taking methadone. I don't know how much the pump helped, but I imagine it did some. Methadone is a great drug when it is used right, but like everything else, it has it's drawbacks.
Like I said; try to relax. It will be okay. Worry about today and screw tomorrow. Why worry about problems that aren't there yet? You will be okay.