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Posted by Kathrin
on September 16, 2000 at 03:22:31:
In Reply to: Re: ERIC you still here?? YES im still alive ...well i dont feel alive but im alive if you know what i mean posted by Eric on September 16, 2000 at 00:20:51:
I am also very glad you are still here....
ok I found a website for you about klonopin, there are many others I saw, but for example:
there is a link to dosage etc... you will see when you get there.
Please be careful, careful with these drugs.. really i don't know a lot but I know how dangerous overdosages can be... but please, please do not feel guilty about being dependent on drugs, this is nothing to feel guilty about, that's not the issue here! The issue here is, how do you get better. And you can get better.
It is probably by now hard for you to differentiate what symptoms come from your panic/anxiety disoreder and what are side effects of the drugs you are taking. Please seriously consider finding a doctor you can trust. You might want to work WITH somebody, to tackle both problems...
Oh and I can relate to what you are saying about the past... especially during my bad times I would always think about the past and hw great it was and how I wanted to LIVE againa nd to just feel all that again, just be the one I was before....
be HOPEFUL is all I can say, I was hopeless at times and felt it would never be ok again, but I was SOOO very wrong...
I posted this poem before but I will again, for you:
LONG PAST NIGHTS
I feel the feeling of long past nights
The mood, the magic, the rhythm, the lights
Stay with me, feeling, stay
The moments I felt years ago
Months of magic in a row
- Don't go far away!
Numbness wants to settle in
as if the lights could never win
Oh hard and lonely fight!
But I believe the good will last
in the end, as in the past
I dive into the night...
And so i walk the empty streets
And block out thoughts of past defeats
Find myself in a song
The lights are shining, look like gold
The wind is blowing, but I'm not cold
I start to sing along
Don't you know there's always hope
Even gliding down a steep steep slope
There's alwasy good times again
We don't know what life will bring
How many new wild songs to sing
How can we get down, my friend?
So many times I thought with tears
Im ,y heart my darkest fears:
Will I ever be happy again?
Oh had I known that before long
I would be singing a brand new song
- That's what I mean, my friend
So I feel the feeling of long past nights
Would I have thought I'd run with the lights
again? oh, feeling, stay!
See life can't be a straight line
After the rain the sun will shine
And melt the clouds away.