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Another day in SIDs pathedic life

Another day in SIDs pathedic life

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Posted by SID on October 08, 2000 at 00:50:28:

Ive been slowly trying to heal myself and im starting to feel better
im still lonely and paranoia hits me every now & then but i dont feel suicidal anymore at all
ive been having insomnia that makes me verry moody and confused
thats just one more thing to add to the pile of garbage in my life
I spent 4 hours talking to Psychologists and Psychiatrists about my problem but they didint really know what to tell me
i didint get any medication either
they seem to think my anxiety is from being in a shooting when i was a little kid and the Ridolin i took as a child made me a paranoid adult
who knows maybie there right
i know i cant depend on doctors to make me better so im giving up on that
im trying the best i can to do it by myself
my life may not be much of a life But its my life and i might as well make the best of it and keep trying
sure i fall down but i get right back up and try again
to me anxiety is a never ending battle
i just get so sick of hearing myself dwell on anxiety
but its hard when you got OCD
anyways nothing new with me
it seems like ive been saying that for along time now
i guess when a person has anxiety they just stop living
and nothing new ever happens
i feel to mentally weak and lack of self esteem to go out and make a life for myself
kinda like im just stuck waiting for something good to happen but always expect the worst
but atleast im feeling better

And Kathrin thanks for checkin on me
i think about you alot and you really did help me feel better THANKS and i mean it from my heart
and take care everybody.
SID


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