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Husband had a vasectomy and I'm pregnant!!!

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Author	Topic: Husband had a vasectomy and I'm pregnant!!! \| Page views:
toadybooboo Junior Member Posts: 7 From:Canada Registered: Jun 2003	posted 06-03-2003 09:32 PM I am in total shock so please bear with me. I am a new member and desperately looking for some answers and came across this site. I have not been feeling very well lately. I never imagined I was pregnant - in fact, I thought I was going through early menopause...or had the flu!! I am pregnant! The test was positive! My husband had a vasectomy 7 years ago, a month before our youngest child was born. I don't know what to do! I haven't told my husband. Accusing me of being unfaithful will not be an option - he will know that it is his. I'm more concerned that he will be thrilled. It is me that does not want a baby. We already have six children! They are 21, 19, 17, 14, 12 and 7. I just graduated from university last year and have a great job. The daycare situation is done! I feel like crying. What am I going to do??? What will I tell people?? What will my kids say?? My daughter is getting married this summer and can't wait to make me a grandmother! I am 38 years old by the way. Am I too old to have a baby?? ------------------ Survival is a Talent! ~mom to many~ IP: Logged
lil squirt Member Posts: 48 From:Ontario Registered: Feb 2003	posted 06-03-2003 09:56 PM Your not to old. My mother was 45 when she had my little sister. I was 17 my brother was 20. Built in babysitters. We were all shocked but super excited also. You will have lots of help with the little one. I hope everything turns out for you. I just wanted to let you know about my mom. My sister is now almost 12 and as healthy as a horse. IP: Logged
tinkers Senior Veteran Posts: 794 From:us Registered: Oct 2002	posted 06-03-2003 10:07 PM Oh my God what a total shocker! For some reason you were meant to have another baby. I wish you the best of luck. And you are not too old! Tink (Lisa) EDD 01-04-04 IP: Logged
wattagirl Senior Veteran Posts: 502 From:tennessee/usa Registered: May 2002	posted 06-03-2003 10:27 PM ugh-now i'm nervous-my hubby is scheduled for his vasectomy on the 20 th and your post makes me very nervous-what are the odds of this happening IP: Logged
chrissy333 Junior Member Posts: 10 From:Vancouver, BC Canada Registered: Jun 2003	posted 06-04-2003 12:24 AM A friend of mine got pregnant with her third baby after he husband got a Vasectomy. baby #2 was only 10 months old. He husband hadn't gone back for his second post op check up. She got her tubes tied after baby number three. IP: Logged
nela Senior Veteran Posts: 1737 From:Barcelona, Spain Registered: Nov 2002	posted 06-04-2003 04:01 AM Well, if you're too old to have your 7th child at 38, then I must be ancient for still trying for my first at the same age! Of course you're not too old! I know it must be a shocker but age isn't the real problem here...it's that you've established a life without a new baby and if you have it, then your life will change.... IP: Logged
mysurprisebaby34 Senior Member Posts: 154 From:adelaide, sa , australia Registered: May 2003	posted 06-04-2003 04:45 AM Hi, I have had a similar situation.....My DH was told about 15 yrs ago that he could not have anymore children due to an accident....I went to the doctors in Feb this yr for the same reasons as you, thought I was going through early menopause or had a hormone imbalance or something....I too came back with a positive pregnancy test.....I am 35 yrs old this year and my son will be a couple of months off of turning 18 when my daughter is born.....I believe she is meant to be...NOt only the fact my DH couldnt have more children, but I also had medical issues affecting fertility...I guess it all comes down to what your beliefs are......I guess it is still a huge shock for you, maybe when it sinks in a bit more you may feel differently...GOOD LUCK WITH WHATEVER YOU DECIDE ------------------ EDD 18/10/2003 ITS A GIRL :) IP: Logged
Momofa4yrold Senior Veteran Posts: 748 From:Hamlin, WV, USA Registered: Dec 2002	posted 06-04-2003 07:30 AM I don't know what your religious beliefs are....but, I feel like this baby in your uterous is a miracle beyond words. God has chosen you to raise this child. Maybe because you did such a good job with your other children. I think it is wonderful. You will have a lot of help. And you can call this your little miracle baby. My mom had me when she was 38. We are best friends now. We do everything together. My oldest sister is 45 years old. Her son (my nephew) is only 5 years younger than me. I am the coolest aunt in his eyes. Because I am so close to his age. I worked with a lady that had twins at age 44. She is a wonderful mother. God has asked you to do this one more time. Are you going to tell him "No"? ------------------ Chloe is due 07/27/03 IP: Logged
autumnleaves Senior Veteran Posts: 1585 From:palos heights, il, usa Registered: Dec 2002	posted 06-04-2003 08:10 AM How I wish I was in your shoes. I am 44 in a little over two weeks and my husband and I want a child together. I would be thanking God in your shoes. I wish you the best of luck and hope you come to feel very happy and positive about this baby! Miracles do not happen every day...Keep your chin up, sweetie. IP: Logged
coppertop Senior Veteran Posts: 631 From:Michigan Registered: Jan 2003	posted 06-04-2003 11:28 AM Wow I have read about some very uncommon cases similar to yours. I would say God really wants you to have this baby If you let yourself get over the initial shock, I bet your excitment will grow, and continue to grow untill you have your baby in your arms. Than, most likely, you will not be able to imagine life without him/her IP: Logged
HEAVEN-SENT Senior Veteran Posts: 879 From:NH Registered: Nov 2002	posted 06-04-2003 11:48 AM This sounds like a miracle baby to me! ------------------ EDD 10/3/03 IP: Logged
lovelyme Senior Veteran Posts: 1593 From:La Habra, CA. USA Registered: Aug 2002	posted 06-04-2003 11:57 AM My DF is getting a vas this summer and now I wonder! He has super sperm. Did your husband ever go back to get the re-tests after the procedure? You're sure he had it done right? Dumb question I know, but hey. I think 38 is fine. Some first time mom's are 38 or older! Brooke Shields is 40 or 41 I think. She just had her first baby a week ago. I think it will be wonderful to have a little one right now. I don't know your whole situation, but I will say this. Everyone tells me that if you ever get pregnant after having a sterilization procedure then that little one was TRULY meant to be. Imagine the odds (and I'm sure you are) yet God did this for a reason. He does not make mistakes. ------------------ Marie It's A Boy!! Expected August 2, 2003 IP: Logged
toadybooboo Junior Member Posts: 7 From:Canada Registered: Jun 2003	posted 06-04-2003 03:06 PM Thank you to everyone for your prompt and supportive responses - I really need this right now. I just can't get over the feeling that this is somehow unfair! For years we struggled financially and raised six kids. We both worked our butts off, while going to university part-time. When our youngest started school two years ago I went back full time and did a masters degree. I now have the career that I always wanted. We bought a great house. I have a car that starts every morning. We were going to take a REAL vacation this year. The oldest two kids are in university full time - totally focused. I have time to do the gardening, walk slowly through the grocery store, dawdle at the bookstore....sigh....I can't imagine why this would happen to me. I think I need to sit on this for a couple more days and sort it out. I do have a lot of faith in God and feel that God has one wacky sense of humour! Abortion is going to be out of the question. My husband is going to be over the top with excitement. I just don't want to tell him until I sort through my own feelings. I still can't stop bawling over this. Everyone thinks I have allergies. ------------------ Survival is a Talent! ~mom to many~ IP: Logged
Dianek Veteran Posts: 295 From: Registered: Aug 2002	posted 06-04-2003 03:15 PM I think you are so blessed, not only to have six children already; but to be blessed with one more. I'd have given anything to have had one more baby, even at age 38 or older, but it was not to be. You have accomplished so much while raising your family, you should be proud of yourself. Keep in mind that babies are only babies for a very short time and with all your older children, I'm sure that the new baby will doted on and loved more than you ever thought. Congratulations! IP: Logged
lovelyme Senior Veteran Posts: 1593 From:La Habra, CA. USA Registered: Aug 2002	posted 06-04-2003 03:47 PM Raising this one will nearly be like raising a seperate child from the rest. You might find this to be just what you needed (oddly I know). You can STILL go on vacation this year too. The baby won't even be here yet. How far along are you? ------------------ Marie It's A Boy!! Expected August 2, 2003 IP: Logged
teapot Member Posts: 41 From:VA Registered: Nov 2002	posted 06-04-2003 05:41 PM Hello!!! You aren't the oldest one here. I'm 42 and my due date is June 20. This is our first child. Better late than never. Other than being tired to the point of comatose each evening, I haven't had any problems at all. I haven't gained much weight, my blood pressure is good and my Dr. thinks I'm having a textbook normal pregnancy. When I first got pregnant, my husband started adding up how old he would be when our daughter graduated high school, college, got married and other stuff like that. I kept telling him that we'd be that old no matter what. Hang in there. Teapot IP: Logged
mysurprisebaby34 Senior Member Posts: 154 From:adelaide, sa , australia Registered: May 2003	posted 06-04-2003 07:34 PM Hi, with evertything that you have mentioned, house , car, career, it sounds to me like you have so much more to offer this baby and witll be able to be a lot more relaxed bringing him/her up as you wont be worrrying so much....You may actually enjoy motherhood more this time around....But I am sure in time you will think all of this yourself You will also have the support of your older children to help out !! Yes god may have a quirky sense of humour, but I think this little one was obviously meant to be on this earth for a reason....I am not really a very religous person, but I can tell you that since finding out about my little miracle I am leaning that way, I feel and know deep down in the core of me that this little girl is meant to be and im sure you will feel the same when it all sinks in ------------------ EDD 18/10/2003 ITS A GIRL :) IP: Logged
babyinmybelly Member Posts: 59 From:Wahiawa, Hi Registered: May 2003	posted 06-04-2003 11:14 PM HI! I think I know a little of how you feel. I am only 25, but pg with my 4th child. My baby is only 8months old. All of my children have been b/c babies. Right before I got pg w/#3 we were living in Wash state and my dh who is in the army had gotten orders to Hawaii. I was thrilled.! My oldest was going to start kindergarten, my second was headed for pre-k and I was going to have my days to finally fullfil my dream of going to college and getting my degree in nursing. Or so I thought. I came down very sick w/broncitis and while the docs diagnosis that they discovered I was also pg. My hear sank. I was in denial the whole 9 months. I was happy, but very sad at the same time. My dh was more than thrilled esp when we found out we were having another boy. In the end, we have the most wonderful baby boy in the world. My heart leaps everytime I look at him. Anyway, baby 4 is on the way and instead of feeling sorry for myself like I did last time, I look forward to all the joys the baby will bring us. I know it's hard and our situations are the exact same, but you aren't alone. Take care, and come back and let us know how you are doing. IP: Logged
mia21 Senior Member Posts: 129 From:Canada Registered: Mar 2003	posted 06-04-2003 11:27 PM Hey there, I understand the complete shock! My mother had 6 children before me. Dad had a vacectomy, and mom got pg 3 years later with me! Then dad had another, and yet again 3 years later mom got pg with my younger sister. The said he be one of those rare cases when a male has more then one tube, sounds strange doesn't it. The doctors told him he should have had them cut not tied as well. Anyways, when my mother was 41 they told he she couldn't have any more children, amazingly enough yet another 3 years passed as she became pg with baby #9 my little brother. She was 44 when she had Alastiar. She never thought she would be a mother of 9. Our family is awesome, I have so many built in friends! Im so blessed to have parents who didn't believe in abortion otherwise Me, my sister Victoria or my baby bro wouldn't be here! Miracles do happen and Im so glad to be called one Good luck with you family. God bless. ------------------ EDD:Nov 19th.first:) IP: Logged
toadybooboo Junior Member Posts: 7 From:Canada Registered: Jun 2003	posted 06-05-2003 10:41 PM Thank you Mia21 for making my day! One of the things I really worry about is whether my kids will actually like each other when they are all grown up. Not that they don't now, but the noise level can get pretty high around here. I see that you are also from Canada - whereabouts, can I ask? The nice thing about being in Canada, is I can have one year maternity leave, but at the same time, I hate the thought of being away from my job that long. This morning I woke up with my 14 year old son at 4:15 a.m. as he is going to Montreal on a school trip. I opened the door to let the cat out and I could smell that first morning air and the birds chirping. I was suddenly hit with how much I LOVED getting up in the night with my babies. I breastfed them all until they were a year old and the middle of the night feedings were so peaceful. I had forgotten about that. Ohhhhh why is this so hard??? I'm up and down now! ------------------ Survival is a Talent! ~mom to many~ IP: Logged
mysurprisebaby34 Senior Member Posts: 154 From:adelaide, sa , australia Registered: May 2003	posted 06-06-2003 04:09 AM Hi, it will all come back to you It has been 18yrs since my last pregnancy and even though i have forgotton a lot of what happens in pregnancy, it has brought back so many memories of when my son was a baby...He will be 18 within a couple of months of my daughter being born ------------------ EDD 18/10/2003 ITS A GIRL :) IP: Logged
Momofa4yrold Senior Veteran Posts: 748 From:Hamlin, WV, USA Registered: Dec 2002	posted 06-06-2003 07:45 AM I think you should tell your husband. Especially if you think he will be excited about it. Maybe he can help you sort through your feelings. If he tells you all of the reasons he is happy about this baby, it will help you to be more confident in it too. Please keep us updated. ------------------ Chloe is due 07/27/03 IP: Logged
PaulaRoet Newbie Posts: 4 From:Apollo Beach, FL USA Registered: Jun 2003	posted 06-08-2003 02:16 PM My sister is 38 and just had her FIRST baby!!! (She was divorced and remarried. Thank God she didn't have a baby with the first guy). I'm 31 and trying desperately for my first!!! I married late at age 29. Paula IP: Logged
JodyC Veteran Posts: 488 From:Lake Orion, MI, USA Registered: Dec 2002	posted 06-08-2003 05:38 PM What a miracle baby you must have inside your belly. I couldn't take my eyes off the screen as I read your story, and read all of the other stories that the other women responded with. Please keep posting with your husband's response, and how you are feeling (emotionally and physically). I am 31 and pg with my first child after two years of infertility treatments, so I believe every child is a blessing. I also work a full time job after completing my masters degree six years ago. I plan on continuing to work after the baby is born (financially I really don't have a choice - well I have a choice, but I enjoy my lifestyle too). My point here is you can be a mom and a career woman. Heck, you've managed to raise six children and get a masters degree! Sounds to me like you can do anything you set your heart and mind to. Best wishes. Jody EDD - 12/6/03 We THINK its a boy! IP: Logged

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