posted 05-08-2003 08:02 PM            

I have some of what you all have described. I usually twitch for lack of a better word, shake, everything tenses up, sometimes curl my toes (I have seen this discussion in other posts) and this continues for as long as I am being stimulated but I eventually have to make my husband stop because I cannot take anymore.

So am I achieving orgasm or am I stopping him/myself before I reach the final stage? If I am stopping to early, what more can I expect?

I get really sensitive and I suppose I am afraid that there is more and what will it feel like.

If you can tell me if I am still missing out on the end or if I am already there based on above, I would appreciate it.

posted 05-08-2003 09:49 PM            

The sensitivity is normal. And the fear you feel about just how much you can take is also normal. You can overcome both if you learn to stop focusing so much on the unknown. That is how I finally was able to let go and experience it.

When I reach orgasm...my breathing becomes rapid and erratic, my back arches, my legs tense up, I have this overwhelming urge to hold on to the bed and/or sheets, my vaginal muscles tighten up squeeze mercilessly, my entire body trembles, and right at the peak...I am unable to breath with all of the physical effort.

posted 05-09-2003 12:55 AM            

How do you maintain while masturbating? Does anyone else have the problem of getting close and not being able to continue?

posted 05-28-2003 01:20 AM            

I have a similar issue as you. The notion of orgasm had been so built up that I was going to be disappointed, or at least, during my first orgasms, until I knew how to make them better. So I too wonder if I have had them.
The descriptions of the female orgasm match mine entirely, sort of. I experience a definite contraction of muscles for a few seconds, and then my body relaxes and I am sensitive. However, while the whole process is great, it wasn't life changing, or like an expolsion. It just felt good. It was more of a muscle spasm. I am starting to believe that I have had an orgasm on the basis of the physical muscle spasms in the vaginal pssage. (is this true?)
I think what the person who started this topic was loking for is this type of physical description. I know very little about orgasms, having only had a recent few,if any, in my life, but I can imagine that not everytime is the same, so describing the feeling is vague. Having also looked into this topic, the basic defining factor (i believe) is a series of muscle contractions in your pelvic region, sometimes in your whole body, like some of the other replyers, but only necessarily in your pelvic, or even only vaginal, region. How intense it is, or how sensitive you are aftreward, varies.
With my limited experience, I would say that you haven't had an orgasm because you did not mention muscle contractions. Just because you become sensitive does not mean you reached a peak, actually, it just indicates that the nerves in that area have become numb through over (and probably incorrect) stimulation for your preference.
My question is: is my description accurate of an orgasm? (muscle contractions, good feeling, relax, but now "explosion") Think back (those of you who had orgasms) to when you first started to come, before you becamse experienced at it, and then compare. The orgasms you are having now are likely better than those as you have become comfortable with your body.
My advice for the other girl like me,(even if you disagree that I haven't had an orgasm,I have lately gotten very close) take a break from having orgasms with your boyfriend, just have sex anyway. Women's bpdies naturally go through phases of high sexual drive and low, or just regular sex drive. Wait until you are in a high sex drive phase, however long it takes, when you are just naturally into sex. The fact that your body can go so far means that you can have an orgasm, so don't rush it. If you are going through a high sexual phase, on nights you are alone try first on your own, then with a vibrator. Just keep experimenting- it will probably take you many such nights before you can have an orgasm, so while you can try for that, at least learn what feels good.Masturbation isn't so great at first, its something you have to learn how to do. Eventually, you will not desensitize your nerves as you get to know your body better, and then orgasms will occur.

posted 08-07-2003 08:17 PM            

By reading your posts I was able to better understand where I was at and I now have my own description.

posted 08-08-2003 12:00 AM            

I would have to say based on my many years of trying to get there and the surprising instant when I finally did that the main problem I had was thinking too much.

I finally just concentrated on what was going on inside and not so much on if I was pleasing my spouse, did I look flattering in this light and so on. Which some of you mentioned as a possible reason for getting close and not quite reaching the top.

I do say that it was amazing to finally get there but that the amazement was more about the fact that "Oh My Gosh, I cannot believe it" than "Oh my GOsh, this is so much better than ...." Because I have been close to one before it was just finally getting the feeling that I wasn't aching for more and in the past I have always felt as if I was missing out on something. I think that for anyone who is in my shoes, it is worth trying to reach the stage where you feel great and the ache is gone. Not necessarily fireworks and such but definately a great feeling.

The truly amazing thing for me was that after my first true orgasm I felt more sensual and feminine. My body felt fuzzy all over for awhile afterword and after obsessing over this for years, I went around for at least 24 hours thinking of nothing else.

As for my situation in general, I still haven't had one through masturbation but if you are out there and are wondering and wishing here is my description and I am not sure if it will help but maybe you can find something within my description and the others listed here to find yours. I now understand also why it is so hard for the rest of you to come up with a definitive description.

For me:

It started out as a real gentle deep down feeling of pleasure focused in my genitals - kind of like when you get really happy about something and you feel really good inside. As the sensation increased I started getting out of breath and my body got fuzzy all over. My body seemed to open up like I could feel more and sense more. My arms and body started to shake and the pleasurable feeling just seem to ripple throughout my whole body. Afterwards, I could be touched but I was very sensitive all over my body.

As someone else mentioned, I definately built an orgasm up in my mind to be something huge and while it is it was not huge in the way I had envisioned and I think letting go of that image helped me reach the point I am at now.

posted 08-10-2003 02:30 AM            

As for myself, I always make myself have the BIG O. Sometimes I can achieve that in just a matter of seconds then other times takes a bit longer. I achieve the vaginal O first then immediately concentrate just on the clit...yes, it is almost too sensitive to touch but if you keep it up in just a few seconds then the sensitivity will ease up and if done just right you can then have just a clitoral O. AWESOME!