posted 05-28-2001 08:03 PM            

You have several issues that need to be addressed.

First, let me tell you that I had a pain that went on for several months and Vicodin saved me alot of suffering. However, as is natural, I became physically addicted. I went to a drug dependency doctor at my HMO and he put me on a schedule to slowly ween myself off the Vicodin. The schedule is about a month long and so far, so good.

Here is what I see going on with you:

(1) You have a physical ailment that apparently is still going on. In order to have some normalcy to your life, you need some kind of medication to control the pain. You also need some sort of physical therapy if it is available for your problems. The real problem is that you are still in alot of pain caused by your injuries. I highly suggest that you get in touch with a pain management clinic. They should be able help you get the right type of drugs for your problem. But keep in mind that these drugs will in all likelyhood result in an addiction of their own. But, you won't have to keep taking so much Vicodin that can ultimately damage your liver.

(2) You have a mental addiction to the euphoria that you get from Vicodin. This evidenced by your comments that,

quote:

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Should I try Ultram....(one of my doctors prescribed this, but even though it helped with the pain, it didn't give me that "warm, fuzzy feeling" that Hydro does)

---

This is quite common and once you make the determination to get off the Vicodin, you can control and ultimately defeat the desire. However, I strongly recommend that you get help if you're having trouble dealing with the psychological addiction, otherwise you may never get free.

(3) You have a physical addiction. After a prolonged period of time of using the Vicodin, your body has come to rely on it. I was taking up to eight 10/500's per day and because I was no longer in pain, I slowly have brought myself down to two 10/500's per day divided up in four doses.

(4) Your husband doesn't know what's going on. It's hard to beat something this painful when you don't have the support you need. I suggest that you confront him with this issue and tell him what you are going through.

Start off by sitting him down and saying to him that you want to discuss something very serious with him.

Second, tell him that you really need his support and understanding and that you don't want his judgment but his help.

Third, tell him what exactly is going on. It won't be easy but it is essential that you communicate your pain and mental anguish.

Fourth, tell him that you want to beat this problem and that you need to go to a pain management clinic to get medication that will work on a longer term basis.

Hopefully you can make him understand how important his help is to you.

After all this, do everything that you promised to do and get his support through these difficult times.

I hope this helps, and I wish you the very best.

posted 05-29-2001 03:46 PM            

For me, it was easy to go from 8 pills/day to 4 pills/day. But going from 4 to 2 was more difficult. I feel a small amount of withdrawals every once and a while but because I spaced out the Vicodin, i.e. 10am, 2pm, 6pm, 10pm, I'm making progress.

posted 05-30-2001 09:19 AM            

This is a program of total abstinence. There are times, however, such
as in cases of health problems involving surgery and/or extreme physical
injury, when medication may be valid. This does not constitute a license
to use. There is no safe use of drugs for us. Our bodies don’t know the
difference between the drugs prescribed by a physician for pain and the
drugs prescribed by ourselves to get high. As addicts, our skill at
self-deception will be at its peak in such a situation. Often, our minds
will manufacture additional pain as an excuse to use. Turning it over to
our Higher Power and getting the support of our sponsor and other
members can prevent us from becoming our own worst enemies. Being alone
during such times would give our disease an opportunity to take over.
Honest sharing can dispel our fears of relapse.” p. 98, 99 “Narcotics
Anonymous”

If you want more input as to my experience with learning about myself just reply to this board of to me personally at hbonilla@tnrcc.state.tx.us