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 I "think" im in love with someone I SHOULDNT give time of day to!
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| Author | Topic: I "think" im in love with someone I SHOULDNT give time of day to! | Page views: |
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Nida Junior Member  Posts: 20 |
posted 06-06-2003 10:25 AM
  
I've already read other posts here about others being in lvoe with peopel they really shouldnt be going after for diff reasons. My problem is this... Last september I realised I had feelings for a work colleague who I barely knew so it was all really physical attraction..and I got the feeling he felt the same. A friend of mine spilled the news to him in november and he was v.shocked and commented that he thought i was "naturally pretty" and to top it off he was so flattered that he kept asking my friend whether it was a joke! Anyway afterwards I was led to believe he'd split with his g/f and I just waited to see what would happen. There was a xmas party at work and I thought we'd "hook up" then BUT that morning a friend told me she'd seen him kissing his g/f! I was COMPLETELY DEVASTATED. So that night I refused to go near him and completely ignored him. It was only the following day I realised he'd broken up with his g/f on the morning of the party! I was absolutely gutted. SOMEHOW (dont ask how!)I got the courage 2 days afterwards to tell him face-to-face how I felt....and well he had a huge grin on his face when I told him and told me he wasnt sure of the next step because he'd just come out of a 3yr long relationship. Afterwards obviously I was very upset...and just couldnt get over him. a friend of mine asked him whether he wouldve ever wanted to get together with me ..and apparently he felt torn answering the question and replied that he def. would if he wasnt with his g/f. Ever since Ive liked him he's always given me signals and drawn me into him (hes v.flirty!) My point is Ive liked him for way too long and I think I may just be in love with him. I cant seem to move on. IP: Logged |
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Greenberry Senior Veteran  Posts: 667 |
posted 06-06-2003 03:52 PM
Don't delude yourself. He is back with his girlfriend because he wants to be, not just out of convenience. If he was really interested in YOU, he would be pursuing you. He knows that you are interested, and yet he is still with the old girlfriend. Get the message? In my experience, men don't often play that hard-to-get game like we female types sometimes do. And if he is playing games with you, do you really want to be with someone like that? IP: Logged |
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Nida Junior Member Posts: 20 |
posted 06-06-2003 03:59 PM
Well believe me I havent deluded myself into believing that he's been "forced" back to his g/f BUT I know a lot about their relationship and know the type of guy he is. Your right about him, hes def. a mind player...he enjoys playin games! Theres more bad in him then good and YET I STILL SEEM TO WANT HIM!!! Its driving me nuts. Ive never felt like this before. IP: Logged |
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SophiaM Senior Member Posts: 139 |
posted 06-06-2003 04:09 PM
Hey Nida! I agree with the previous post--he just isn't interested in a relationship with you, not at this time at least. It's possible that he finds you attractive and likes to flirt with you, however he is not interested enough to pursue you but went back to his ex-girlfriend instead. I know it drives you crazy and makes you want him even more--I've been there myself, but it's just a recipe for a heartache. People always seem to want what is out of reach more-- it's the challenge thing, unfortunately it hardly ever works. Please try to concentrate on something else--easier said than done, yes, but I'm sure one day you'll meet someone who wants you just as much as you want him. Good luck! IP: Logged |
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stolie Senior Member Posts: 202 |
posted 06-06-2003 04:17 PM
From your situation, it sounds more like you lust after him than are in love with him. Don't trick yourself into thinking this is love. [This message has been edited by stolie (edited 06-06-2003).] IP: Logged |
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Magnetic Veteran Posts: 492 |
posted 06-06-2003 04:47 PM
Well, let me give a guys perspective here. Sometimes we guys take the easy route. If his g/f was actively after him, he may have simply found it easier to take her back and stick with her than risk attempting a new relationship. The fact that he is now aware that there is someone else out there for him can change the dynamics of his current relationship. In other words, if you continue to be a friend, he may eventually break it off permanantly with her and come to you. To pull this off, you have to appear to be no more than just a friend - someone he can discuss his relationship with. Don't flirt, or allow him to flirt with you. Just be a friend who is there for him. If his g/f is controlling and takes him for granted, knowing that you are available may make it eventually easier for him to leave her. That said, you run the risk of getting doubly hurt in case he doesn't leave her. I am not suggesting that you avoid other men to concentrate only on him. That is why I said to only be a friend. In fact, if he knows you are seeing others, he may be jealous! Play this game at your own risk, but I would not necessarily write him off if you think he is the right guy. IP: Logged |
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Nida Junior Member Posts: 20 |
posted 06-08-2003 02:49 PM
Thanx for that Magentic! I REALLY needed an un-biased guy's opinion. I will now just be a friend to him...and I know if I try I could find someone else for me. Maybe do both and see the outcome?!!!!!!!!!!! IP: Logged |
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