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Posted by Mary on February 27, 2000 at 17:58:44:

In Reply to: out of the mists....out of the blue posted by Sue on February 26, 2000 at 18:58:45:

: Been lurking for 10 days now hopeing somebody would post usuable info for me
: but I guess it isn't going to happen.

: The school called a meeting with me last week and wants to test my daughter
: for ADD. This kind of came as a bolt out of the blue.

: She's 7 yrs old, in the second grade. Her work is good. She is not
: disruptive but busy. She does have trouble writing on the lines and her
: handwriting is messy. She does have trouble with spelling and reading.
: Reading teacher says she's behind but only a tiny bit. All teachers and aids
: do say she is not a candidate for retention. The concern is mainly with her
: small motor skills.

: The school intends to start testing after vacation this week.

: I'm trying to take a "wait and see" attitude as far as the testing goes but
: I'm totally nervous now. The school psychologist is famous for his ritalin
: giving. There is a very disproportionate number of kids on meds in the
: school. Some of the grades have over half!!!

: I do see what they are pointing out as far as her writing and spelling. Some
: of her actions at home suggest ADD as well. Chances are I am ADD been
: reading some of the stuff out there and it all fits, way too well. Haven't
: taken it all in yet but I now have a name for my demon.

: I asked the school if a tutor would help and they said no. Nothing wrong
: with her work. I live near a teachers college and it would be easy to find
: an elementary ed. student to come for a little twice a week and help her
: with writing and spelling.Almost seemed liked the special ed teacher had
: already made up her mind.
: She seems to be able to spell most times if I give the words to her orally
: but putting them to paper she falters. An outside person would be fun to her
: and she would look foward to something like that.

: I want only the best for her but I'm scared.
: What do I watch for as far as the school goes?
: What do I watch for with her?

: My daughter is more pressing but where do I get help for myself?
: I'm 41 yrs old. None of this exsisted when I was a kid. Only the really
: disruptive kids were looked at. I was in the top 5% in the school system as
: far as intelligence goes so a breezed through most of my years unoticed. My
: teen years hit and I spun out of control.
: It's blown my college education, got me thrown out of HS, messed up good
: jobs.

: My daughter is set. Her father has very good insurance through the state.
: Unfortunatley we are not married and I have nothing.
: I have noticed that I am withdrawing more in the last year. Getting worse
: almost like when I was a teen again. I still function but really would
: rather never leave the house. Used to be a cop and froze up when the chief
: tried to make me do a radio commercial. He shipped me off to psychiatrist
: who specializes in cops and the Dr said I was a social phobic. Nothing
: horrid. Just extremely shy. I fought my phobia by learning how to dispatch
: the different police cars in our area and I probably could do a radio
: commercial now without a problem but that's just the tip of the iceberg and
: over and done with.
: Now I work at Dunkin Donuts and barely make enough to make ends meet.
: Chances are daughter's father is ADD to. He won't contribute even an opinion
: to any of this. He lives with us but doesn't deal with anything. Withdraws
: into his little fantasy world he has made. Ocassionally he comes out with
: flashes of brilliance or energy but nothing ever comes of it.

: Now what??????

: Sue
: who has done more reading in the last 10 days than in the last 10 yrs.

Go ahead and have your daughter tested as ADD is not about how smart a child is. It deals with lots of things like poor small motor coordination skills etc. My only concern is that you said the school was doing the testing. Unless they have the testing equipment right at your school I would prefer to see her tested at a compentent clinic that does just such type of testing. The people there are qualified to do the testing as well as interpret the test results. I am not sure I would feel that the school personnel are qualified for this. Good Luck

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