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Posted by Victoria on October 23, 2000 at 22:34:57:

In Reply to: Re: Not doing so well.................. posted by Jessica on October 23, 2000 at 14:17:19:


: I am doing okay. I am starting to sleep a little bit. I have smoked once since Tuesday. My husband has told me he will slow down. He does need to do it in his own time, so I am trying to give him his own space. He has gone down from 3x per day to 0-1x per day. I asked him to try to not do it when I am around, so he is trying to respect that. It isn't going to be an easy road, but we are both strong people, and I am sure we will get through this.

: I am sorry to hear about your husband. I always hate to hear the term "but only if you let us". It sucks because he is quitting for you not him. This can cause problems. I hope you can get him to understand. I also think it really sucks because you are home all day, and you can think about what you are going to talk to him about. And when he comes home he is bombarded by you. It is so natural, and I worry about you. You may want to consider counselling for both you and your husband. They might be able t ohelp you communicate to each other, as well as allow you some professional means to quit. This would be a good use of that saved money from not buying anymore. Good luck. You are in my thoughts.

: Jes

Dear Jes,

I'm so glad to hear that you're trying to go without it. The REAL test is when there isn't any in the house. How bad will each of you crave it, just for one time a day? You'll have to try it and see.........

You sound like someone who HAS the willpower to taper off and quit, eventually, for good. I hope that you both do. When I had my hysterectomy, I couldn't smoke, because the coughing nearly ripped out my stitches. It WAS lousy to see what my husband looked like stoned, when I wasn't. I hope you are a patient person. I used to get downright angry when I'd look at him, and see him in that stupid stupor. If he is stoned, and you aren't, try to distance yourself from him, so you don't end up fighting. After awhile, it can really get on your nerves. I'll be thinking of you, and wishing you well. Keep posting! I'll be looking forward to hearing of your progess, or troubles, God forbid.


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