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Old 06-22-2007, 12:46 PM   #5
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: CA
Posts: 67
violaroses HB User
Re: if only i could run away,

aug 24th . everything you guys are saying makes sense. i have to put distance, and get a tougher back, and i have to take care of my daughters. i just got done booking an appt for emily (9) to see somebody, .
i am not happy about my mom. i hate that i have had thoughts of i wish it was mom, and not dad whom passed; dad wouldnt do this to us. ( we dont know what he would do, but i dont think anything like this) . i miss my mom so much, i think thats why i keep putting up with torture, (miss the old ways of her, ) i try to be happy for dad, i try to make things fun. i bought the girls those skater shoes after dad died so he could look from heaven and laugh at the girls. and we do lots of neat art projects, and family stuff. but its so hard. because i am still dealing with my very own grief of dad. my favorite place to go cry is in the shower so nobody will hear me, or see me sad. my girls pick up on my emotion, they are too much like me, sensitive, feeling, : ) thank you so much ((()))