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Old 08-19-2010, 07:40 AM   #4
Junior Member
Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: Australia
Posts: 10
coggles HB User
Re: any one have those days when ....

I have way too many of those days. I have been looking after my Mum, who is in a wheelchair, for about 20 years, and haven't had a vacation in all that time. I get one afternoon a week when a sitter stays with her and I get to go out and do things for myself.
But I've been reading a great book lately, called The Selfish Pig's Guide to Caring, and I highly recommend it to everyone in the same situation. One thing he points out - which helps us all feel like we're normal people and not freaks - is that all caregivers feel guilty about wanting time to themselves. We tend to forget that we're important too, and then start to think we're selfish for wanting to do things for us.
It's SO important to make time regularly to do something we want to do, or something that makes us feel better about ourselves. Even if it's just an hour a day, or half a day a week. Go get your hair done, or phone a friend (not that many of them stay around when you're a caregiver, sigh) or buy a new nail polish, or have a bubble bath, or play at the children's playground, see a movie, have a massage - whatever makes you happy MUST be included in your life, otherwise we just become robots.
It's so much easier to cope with the regimented routine of caregiving when you have something to look forward to, even if it's just something most people who aren't caregivers would take for granted.