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Old 09-20-2010, 05:49 PM   #1
GenGen*'s Avatar
Join Date: Jun 2010
Posts: 85
GenGen* HB User
I need mature advice.

I'm sorry I haven't been on for a while.

...My boyfriend of two years broke up with me last Thursday.
I don't even want to describe the pain I feel.
He said we couldn't be together because we were drifting apart,
and the relationship just wasn't going where he wanted it to go.
I can't tell you how much it took me by surprise..
He refused all contact with me,
and so did I, despite feeling incredibly sad yet angry because
I would never know what was the real reason for him ending our

And I knew, even though things were hectic, and frightening..
that he would talk to me again. And he did.
You can guess already what he said. He felt so stupid and as if he had
made a terrible mistake, and deep down, I know he did. He wants to get back together, to have one more chance, but I told myself that a third chance at being together could out..
I told him that as much as I believed that he was telling the truth about what he wants, being hurt a third time...I can't risk it.
He did not get mad, and he was crying.. so I know he cares and he does still
love me.
And I love him so very, very much. But I don't want to risk another try,
because there's the possibility that it won't work, even if he says he'll change. I don't want to lose him again, and I don't want to lose the hope that we could have been at least friends..
He let me ask him several questions about why and what went wrong.
And he answered all of them.
He said he was scared, and that he had commitment issues (when believe me, I never would have thought he did because he never told me anything was seriously bothering him and looked happy with me most of the time). He couldn't tell me that he was having doubts, that he wasn't sure if he was wasting his time, and he felt bored of the routine of seeing each other at almost the same place every week. (we're both 16)
But I told him my doubts, I told him everything. I told him constantly to tell me anything, anything, because we would work it out no matter what. But he didn't. And I was just so sad to hear that, to hear that he was scared and we could have..we could have worked it out!

I want him to be free. I want him to do the things he wants to do, to live the life he can't live being with me. He admits he was selfish, and inconsiderate, and impulsive. But believe me, everyone when I tell you that despite the arguments, despite our
differences, he always treated me right, and made me feel safe and happy. and I tried so hard to do the same. And I did. I'll always remember we had something truly special. Maybe it just wasn't the right time.

What do you guys think? I'm hoping we could be together later in the future, but I don't want to make him wait although he says he will.

Yet when I told him we should remain friends and take it very slow, he respected my decision.
I do not want to be in his life for revenge or for all those crazy reasons some exes may have; we want to be in each others lives because we care and do love each other. But we have to think rationally and have time apart. What should I do?

Advice, please..I'm confused

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