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Old 12-30-2010, 10:41 PM   #1
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: Toronto, Ontario, Canada
Posts: 1
NikkiM727 HB User
Question OCD and Intimate Relationships..

My bf and I have been fighting through my OCD for a month now. We are a new frech relationship and he cares about me enough and has educated himself on OCD that he wants to help me.

I am OCDing about a comment he made today and want to see what others feel about it.

We were cleaning his room yesterday and he threw a comment out there that he didn't know what was in his room (referring to cards, letters etc.. from his ex gf- they have been broken up for two years) and he didn't want me to obsess about them being there and if there happened to be something it was just because he didn't know it was there. We ended up finding a valentines day card, a card she gave him for his one year of being sober, and a condom.

He immediately saw the name on the card being from her and said "ew" and threw it out. I asked him if I was not there helping him clean would he be curious to read what she had written in the card (knowing it was for valentines day and we all know it would have been "I love you, you are the love of my life etc..). He said that there would be the possibility of him being curious only to see what she said but not that he cared about her. I then said if you know that it's a valentines day card then you have a hint as to what she wrote consists of so whay would you be curious? Am I right with this? Or is it a normal human reaction to be curious to read the card before you throw it out?

As I was hounding him with this question the poor guy was trying to exaplin to me and defend himseld but said "who knows, maybe I would be curious for closure". HE then said no I don't need closure and I got mad that I had just walked away. He called me and said that the closure was because she was the only part of that stage of his life that he would still have something left. He was an alcholoic and drug user from the time of 13-23. He said all his drug things were thrown away when he got sober and the only part he would have left to remind him of that part of his life would be her. So that card and reading it would apparently give him closure not of their relationship but of what he went through while they were together (drug addiction, her putting up with it etc...) Can someone please help!!

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