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Sterling092 10-13-2016 05:18 PM

Emotional abuse
I was hoping to find a great guy who I would spend forever with. So I met a guy and he was amazing. We talked everyday, hung out like everyday for the entire day and had so much fun. He was smart, funny, cute, nice, sweet, honest, compassionate and everything I was looking for. I started to really like him. We dated and things were great. Still the same guy I met and liked. Then one day out of the blue, I noticed something wasnít right so I thought its the male hormone that is doing it. I was wrong. It was a nightmare. I remember one time I wore this cute shirt and shorts thinking heíd like it. Nope. He said I was fat. I cried. I wore makeup and he said donít ever wear it again. If I was talking to friends, heíd say donít ever talk to them again. I have the best job ever and he said I donít deserve to have it as a career. He would be so jealous and controlling on where I went and if I hung out with friends, heíd call me and if I didnít answer heíd leave me like 10 messages in maybe 5 minutes. One time we got into an argument and he almost hit me. One hit I couldíve been dead. I cried so hard when that happened and he said look Iím sorry. I will never do that again. What can I do to make you stop crying? I said donít ever do that again. He said I wonít. So I forgave him. He would always talk about his ex girlfriend and put me down by saying that Iím cheating when Iím not. He would call me fat, stupid, ugly, worthless, I canít have a career, no friends, no family, I have to be with only him. His parents always asked why I donít date guys my religion which is true I donít date guys my religion but its my choice. I got a transformation and he said he didnít like it. I donít deserve the new look. So one day, I didnít eat a lot and felt miserable because of it. I couldnít take it. I finally told my family and friends and they were so supportive. I lost weight and didnít feel like myself. I didnít like that I was disappearing and my clothes didnít fit. I felt worthless. I felt ugly. I felt like everything he said. I showed happiness but deep down I wasnít. I had no self confidence and kept smiling to show that I was confident. He called when I was getting ready to go out and I said I canít because I have plans. Thatís when the screaming, yelling, threatening, cursing got to me. I couldnít believe the guy I now loved was Saten! He was so scary, made me walk on egg shells. I couldnít talk to him otherwise heíd yell at me. He was so mean towards my family that he had a temper, yelling, screaming, cursing and saying rude things to my mom. He hated my sister. After 6 years of dating, I broke up with him. At first I was scared of how heíd react but he messaged me saying I didnít mean to hurt you. Take me back. I said I canít. I canít do this. You hurt me so bad I just canít. He scared me so bad with the behavior that I was so negative about myself thinking maybe I am fat. Maybe Iím stupid. No guy will want me. I donít deserve a career. Now, Iím happy. I still have my job, amazing friends and family, I gained the weight back, Iím eating a lot, I feel pretty, gorgeous, confident, happy, I made new friends and best of all, I lost him! I didnít need negativity in my life. When I dumped him, I cried but slowly I felt like a weight was lifted off my shoulders. If anyone is being abused, leave! Iím so happy I did! Iím free!!!!

yayagirl 01-14-2017 01:15 PM

Re: Emotional abuse
Thank you Sterling092,

Thank you for that beautiful story of victory over your low self-esteem issues! Don't ever put up with a put down again, ever, not even once.

Anyone that puts others down thinks they are superior and we cannot ever convince those people that we are OK or have value. People can only change themselves, and first they have to recognize the truth. We can't help abusers. We can only leave them alone. Thank God you are learning your own value just the way you are!

I am so happy for you! Thanks for sharing!


Sterling092 01-14-2017 02:37 PM

Re: Emotional abuse
I seriously thought I would never leave. With the discrimination, being let down, screamed,yelled and cursed at, I thought I deserved it. If I can go back in time, I wouldn't have met him. If I can said one word about how I felt being abused it would be scary. I literally felt like he was going to kill me. I had trouble sleeping some nights. I was so afraid of this man. He would tell me horrible things about me and I never thought it would happen to me. The first person I told was my mom about being abused. She always was checking up on me. She knew his evil side because she's seen it. im so thrilled to be out of the Satan relationship. I finally am eating, more confident, and feeling incredible.

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