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  • Assault happens to men too

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    Old 06-14-2017, 04:47 AM   #1
    Jcav1
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    Assault happens to men too

    Im just writing this to let people/men know that they are not alone when it comes to this topic, I am a male and I have been attacked before on multiple occasions.

    it all started when i was a kid and i was around 5 or 6 years old, i had a friend and he and I would play games together all the time and we would always have playdates and what not in his room, then i remember one day he came up to me and told me he wanted to practice and that i was an actress and he was a fan of hers and he proceeded to take my clothes off and touch me i had no idea what was going on, I was confused, then he laid me down on his bed and started to kiss me, i told him i didnt want to do that, and i didnt know what was going on , then the next thing i remember is holding my eyes really tight, crying, and clenching my teeth as he inserted himself into my body and it was unbearable i was so scared and i couldnt think, i tried to push him off but i couldnt and he said if i tried to fight him he would hurt me, it had felt like hours had gone by. I just laid there sobbing wanting it to stop. He had done this practice a few more times 3 or 4 by the time i moved if i can remember, i then grew up, questioning myself because of my incident i tried dating and i have gone through many relationships and i dont even remember them but the 3 longest relationships i have had were all abusive.

    Since then I have been trying to grow and have a happy, healthy relationship with my current girlfriend, I have known her for 6 years and we have been dating for almost a year, she has my heart and soul, and I just want things to get better.

    Just want to share that I understand what it can be like to be abused.

     
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    Old 06-16-2017, 08:37 AM   #2
    yayagirl
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    Re: Assault happens to men too

    Dear Jcav1,

    Thanks for sharing that on behalf of all who have experienced sexual abuse.
    I know it took a lot of strength to share that.

    What others do is only and always the fault of the abuser. Abusers usually were abused themselves. That doesn't excuse it; it's just a fact. We can stop the cycle.

    Abuse can make us vulnerable to inappropriate trust in others, as if trusting will protect us. Trust instead in your own self, and if someone disrespects you or themselves in any way at all, stay away from that person. That person is not someone to trust.

    Unfortunately abuse and neglect usually in some way starts within the family, even if it was from someone the parents allowed into the home, not knowing what was going on, so we can feel like we cannot protect ourselves. But as you mentioned, we can change that dynamic.

    Good for you and thank you so much for sharing. yes, sexual abuse can affect anyone regardless of gender.
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    ~ YaYa ~

     
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