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rosequartz 01-03-2020 01:27 PM

narcississtic mother
I've recently come to the conclusion that I have been raised by a narcissist, which comes a quite a shock to me as I always thought she was an empath. Turns out, she hid it well, as she is a covert narcissist. She has gotten worse with age, and she is 89 now. I always knew something wasn't right with our relationship and I struggled wondering what it was, but now after realizing this, it's the only thing that makes sense. I don't know how to deal with her. She's passive aggressive, emotionally abusive and manipulative, and I'm very sad to think that she doesn't even like me, much less love me.
Anyone else in a similar situation?

MSNik 01-03-2020 04:43 PM

Re: narcississtic mother
Hi it possible this is happening as she ages? I know my mother who is almost 80 is seemingly more and more narcissistic brother and I joke about it.

It really has nothing to do with loving you or not loving you- and it could simply be her age which is changing may not have been her normal personality all her life.... but as our mothers age, they appear to think its "all about them" at least that is what I am experiencing!

JohnR41 01-04-2020 07:23 AM

Re: narcississtic mother
Hi rosequartz,

At age 89 the chances of developing dementia are high and there are over 400 different types of dementia. Alzheimer's and vascular dementia are just two of the most common types. The progression of dementia is not the same for everyone and often a person can have two or more types at the same time. My father had Alzheimer's and I noticed that his personality changed at times.

The problem with dementia is that it often goes undetected for some period of time, so friends and relatives might wonder why there has been a change in behavior. It's very difficult to pin down in the very beginning.

rosequartz 01-13-2020 12:02 PM

Re: narcississtic mother
thank you both. I don't know if it has to do with age in her case because she's always been manipulative and passive aggressive, as far back as I can remember.
I don't think it's dementia, but sometimes I think she plays dumb ... which I've read is another form of manipulation. She's always done that too ... LOL

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