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  • im afraid to sleep at night!

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    Old 04-25-2007, 02:39 PM   #1
    deskette
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    Unhappy im afraid to sleep at night!

    if you've never read any of my post, i take adderall daily. no more than 40mg a day. i think ive built a tolerance cause now when i take 20mg in the morning, if i dont drink coffee i still feel tired and not wanting to be productive. anyways, thats not my point...

    there was one occasion where i was taking a shower, and i was terrified because for some STRANGE reason i felt like i was being watched. i found myself continuously peaking behind the shower curtains & i honestly finished my shower within like 5 mins. fastest shower I HAVE EVER HAD. i wont say what i imagined was behind these shower curtains, because it gives me chills sitting here and having a mental picture of it in my head. makes me want to start crying (note: i didnt actually see or feel anything physically there, mentally i felt like there was something present).

    something else scary: there has probably been at least once a week where ill go to bed, and im paranoid. ill be ready for bed, and ill turn off my floor lamp, and then just lay there. but im afraid to close my eyes, but im also afraid to open them because im scared there will be something in front of my face. this has only happened on nights i went to bed late, around like 2 am. if i go to bed before midnight i have no problem with turning out the lights and going to sleep.

    there was one occassion where i actually left my floor lamp on the entire night because i was too freaked out to sleep in the total darkness. i woke up probably about 20 times that night, but i was able to drift back to sleep easily. lastnight i got in bed about 11 pm. i was yawning, tired and everything. but i started to watch the tyra show and ended up staying up until 1. well when i went to turn off my tv (all the lights were already off) i found myself.... begging myself to turn it back on. so i layed there, until 4 am watching music videos. the only reason i think i even fell asleep was because i took a PM tyenole (i dont know how to spell that!).

    so i dont know whats going on, but i am 20 years old and i have never been afraid to sleep in total darkness or felt this kind of fear. there have been hundreds of times where randomly i would walk into a room at our house and feel something present and sometimes i would continue getting what i went in there for but other times i had to litterally turn around and walk out of the room but that never terrified me... this has come to the point that when i lay there in the dark, my mind sits there and starts thinking of all these things that could happen, for example... if "somebody" started moving the blanket, or turn on the TV, or touch my hand, or make random sounds, or do something to pyhsically hurt me... and I KNOW THATS CRAZY! but these things are running through my head...and thats why i find myself.. begging myself to turn the light back on.

    i dont know if this is anxiety, paranoia, or maybe even hallucinations... i dont know what. i do know that whatever this is going on- i am terrified. does anybody have a clue? the only person ive talked to about this is an ex bf because i know hes not going to judge me. so please, if you have any ideas post a reply! the reason i mention adderall is because this didnt start happening to me until a past few months, ive been taking adderall since jan. do you think its an affect from this med. or am i possibly having some kind of mental attack?

     
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    Old 04-25-2007, 04:42 PM   #2
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    Re: im afraid to sleep at night!

    I'm so sorry that you're going through this.
    I've expeirienced it too.
    Though, some of it is due to post-trauma, where I was in danger.
    But, I was doing well and then started "checking" again- I habe OCD & PANIC)
    I look under the bed and in the closet at night before bed somtimes, too often, in fact.
    I know that no one is there- like you said- but I just ahve to check, for peace of mind to get to sleep.
    I suppose this is post-trauma, because it started from that-
    but i started to worry i was delusional or something cause it sometimes would worry me so much-
    like I said-I knew no one was there, but I kept worrying that their mioght be someone there...
    This sounds like what you have.
    And even though you may have not had an experience to have directly caused this worry (you should ask yourself if you have)-
    there are enough images out there, on tv, in moves, ect-
    of women beign in danger..
    so, it's no wonder that someone with panic disorder, or simply an overactive imagination and anxiety- would begin to worry about their safety- howvere rational or not.
    The fact that you realizxe this is irrational makes you not delusional-
    it simply means you are having excess anxiety over something you recognioze as an irrational fear.
    So, i think you just have an anxiety prob.
    Have you been to the shrink?
    What about behavior threapy- that might really help you conquer this fear.
    It's obviously effecting you enough that you should seek help, but you don't necisarily need medication, and are most certainly not "nuts."
    Good luck!
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    Old 04-25-2007, 09:36 PM   #3
    deskette
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    Re: im afraid to sleep at night!

    thank you so much for your response... its nice to know that somebody has experienced similar things! the reason i mention adderall is because i have never had these kind of problems... i just started in Jan. this year.. 2007 taking adderall XR from a day to day basis. so i did some research and found exactly what i was looking for...

    {REMOVED}

    i will say that i have experienced everything on that list except for blurred vision, and the tics/tourettes so... along with other research i have come to the conclusion that it is the adderall making this kind of turn in my behavior. something else i found was that for psychotic children adderall may "bring out" psychoctic bahaviors. so obviously, i need to stop taking this med. i know that i need to speak to my doctor about it, in which i will do. but its just crazy how these meds can drasticly alter a persons being. I dont want to have this insane fear for the rest of my life. i rather be day dreaming all the time instead of being scared of everything!

    Last edited by msmod; 04-26-2007 at 08:55 AM. Reason: Don't copy and paste material from other sources. Ms_Mod

     
    Old 04-26-2007, 06:45 AM   #4
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    Re: im afraid to sleep at night.

    It really sounds like you are suffereing from medications side effects. Is there any chance of swapping you medication?

    Sincerely,
    MG

    P.S.
    Went and looked up the facts on Adderall. Anxiety and all that you describe are side effects to be expected in some patients.. they are also signs of withdrawl.. Your body may have built up that tolerance and as a result you are getting smacked with the withdrawl symptoms because there is just not enough in your system now. Are you taking Adderall for ADHD/ADD or a sleep disorder?

    Get to your physician and get checked out.
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    Last edited by mkgb; 04-26-2007 at 08:11 AM. Reason: More information

     
    Old 04-26-2007, 07:10 AM   #5
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    Re: im afraid to sleep at night.

    Yea, I would try switching medications. The only other thing I can think of is face your fears. Like when you are laying in bed with your eyes closed, open them several times just to prove to yourself that you can do it and nothing is there. Also, while taking a shower don't peek out of the curtain. Stay in the shower for as long as you need to and enjoy it. I know all of this is easier said then done, but you have to start somewhere. I used to do the same thing when going to bed.. I would get nervous and thought if I opened my eyes something would be there. So, I pushed myself to do what I didn't want to do and now I know that there's nothing there and nothing to worry about. Just take baby steps with it. And maybe from now on set a bed time for yourself. (Sounds kind of childish) but do it so you can fall asleep with ease. If none of that works I would definately see another Dr. Best wishes!

     
    Old 04-26-2007, 09:33 PM   #6
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    Re: im afraid to sleep at night.

    i actually looked up side affects of Adderall XR and what im experiencing are side effects.

    [removed]

    i have experienced all the above except for the tics/touretter's. so i need to speak with my doctor. ive decided since tomorrow was already friday, i would stop taking adderall over the weekend and see what kind of difference it makes. ive been taking sleeping meds to make sure im going to bed by midnight. but like who would have thought... meds that are suppose to help... actually brings about something worse? you know?

    Last edited by mod-anon; 04-26-2007 at 11:31 PM. Reason: Do not copy material directly from another website.

     
    Old 05-01-2007, 09:42 PM   #7
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    Re: im afraid to sleep at night!

    okay guys im just going to make a little update... first off i didnt realize i couldnt copy & paste things from the net... so my apologies.

    come to find out Adderall XR has have affected me in many of the rare ways, im refering to the rare syptoms listed in the paper work. It has been noted that Adderall XR can cause psychosis (i dont know if thats spelled right), mental issues, tourettes, suspiciousness, bipolarness, thought process (mentally), aggressive behavior, psychotic symptoms (such as hearing voices or things that are not actually there, believing things that arent true, etc.) and general maniac symptoms. So this med can be extremely dangerous.
    There are a list of things i have experienced from the above information...

    -suspiciousness (always thinking and feeling like somebody/something wants to hurt me)
    -my mental thought process (i've found myself thinking of things ive never thought of before, ex. being paranoid and afraid of things that i never even thought about)
    -psychotic symptoms (hearing/feeling things that arent really there)

    the things i have actually experienced are detailed and bold fonted in the above text. i will make it clear that i have NEVER been diagnosed with any mental issue and i've never had any problems what so ever within that type of mentality. nor have i ever had suicidal thoughts. i have always been that care free outgoing girl with the random sarcastic personality. so ALL OF THIS is rather new to me. [removed]
    I am glad that i have done my research and found the information i needed because now i know that im really not crazy. I dont know how rare this is but if you are considering Adderall XR you SHOULD really pay close attention to your symptoms. There are other meds that can help you with your ADD/ADHD and they wont make you feel this way. So that is my update.


    *ill make a little note here saying that just because Adderall XR didnt work for me, doesnt mean it wont work for you! we all have different things going on throughout our bodies. and everybody handles everything differently.

    Last edited by mod-anon; 05-14-2007 at 04:10 AM. Reason: peer sharing only

     
    Old 05-05-2007, 12:22 PM   #8
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    Re: im afraid to sleep at night!

    It is obvious that the med has caused all this. If your or any other doctor wants to suggest you are mentally ill, that the med merely "unmasked" a previously undiagnoised condition, if I were you I wouldn't buy it. Why? Because drugs effect everyone differently, just like anything else. For example, there are people who could actually die from eating one peanut yet I can eat a cupful with no ill effects...and that's just a peanut! Imagine the differences in people when you are dealing with strong drugs.

    The drill is to not blame the drug from what I've seen. That is because to blame the drug would be to stop the drug, and Big Pharma cannot have that, so all the data and trials they give to doctors is to encourage the unmasked theory and yes, it's all theory not fact since they have no way to physically confirm any lack or any real measure of any one neurotransmitter in the human brain.

    In other words, if a doctor tells you that you are low in let's say serotonin, he is guessing based on a theory born from drug experiements/effects. He really doesn't know for sure.

    So the unmasking theory is good for big pharma as they can sell the antipsychotic drugs as a result of that theory and subsequent new diagnosis or bi-polar, psychosis or whatever. They justify the theory based on the question that why don't all patients have the psychotic reactions?

    My answer is a peanut is a peanut, isn't it? Yet a peanut can be life or death to some people. So for those people, don't eat the peanut!

     
    Old 05-08-2007, 12:38 PM   #9
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    Re: im afraid to sleep at night!

    okay well update...
    i went to the dr today and talk to him about everything i have talked about in this thread. i think he did begin to think maybe it was a unmasked mental illness because he said "your right this could be from the med, but if it doesnt stop after you stop taking it then it could be something else..." and he kind of gave me this smirk. but you see i have already stopped taking adderall xr and i feel better.. so anyway i was like "i did not feel this way before i started taking it. i know that im not crazy which is why i have done this research" and he kind of looked at me like he didnt believe me. i also printed out everything so he didnt think i was making it up.
    so then i asked if hes heard of these side effects and he says yes... blah blah blah. by the end of the appointment i tell him that i want to try another med, i dont want to take adderall. and he says "what you did is smart. its good that you were able to realize what was going on" and he starts talking about the other meds & asks me which one i am familar with... and anyways long story short, im doing research on these other adhd meds... and it turns out THEY ALL HAVE THESE "RARE" side affects.

    so really, my question NOW is will i have these psycho mania symptoms with all of these meds? i looked up concerta, ritalin & strattera and they all have these mania affects going on. even suicide possiblities for strattera. im afraid to try any because im afraid ill feel the way i did before..

    what do you suggest?? any advice or comments appreciated.

     
    Old 05-09-2007, 09:07 PM   #10
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    Re: im afraid to sleep at night!

    That "smirk" comes from someone who knows he's more educated but doesn't realize the flaws in that education given to him. From the sound of it, it seems you pretty much wiped that smirk right off his face....good for you....by doing your research!

    The only sad part here is you might not be able to take these types of meds; not that I feel it's sad personally, since they have, as you know now, ill effects of not only mental but even through time physical ill health effects. So you save yourself from cardiovascular and many other complications to your future health. But the sad part is you feel you need some help with your ADD and without meds there isn't alot out there.

    However, what is out there has been very successful with many people, from CBT therapy and tutoring to nutritional/health things like fish oil, exercise and good diet. My own nephew really benefited from tutoring: expensive but so were all those doc visits and meds he tried first. I read a very recent clinical study which showed vast improvement in ADD by using both fish and evening primrose oils in the diet. Here's the thread link
    [url]http://www.healthboards.com/boards/showthread.php?t=421327[/url]

    I hope you find an answer. Hopefully you will avoid the meds if you can...but at least you are fully informed and will not fall prey to the unproven theories that you would be mentally ill such as bi-polar,psychotic, etc. merely because you have a bad side effect from a drug. So I'm sure you will be fine. Good luck!

     
    Old 05-09-2007, 09:38 PM   #11
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    Re: im afraid to sleep at night!

    yeah i think i did prove my point pretty clearly to him. [removed] so i have to been pretty clear headed you know... im slicker than most think i am. and he wasnt going to tell me something that wasnt the truth. i know i am a person with complete solid mentality and no doctor is going to tell me otherwise, OR write it in my charts. i was sure that he didnt write anything crazy. i actually kept mentioning how common it is for this & that i was not going to allow anybody to diagnose me with a mental issue. it makes me a little irriatated he would even try that. i have been seeing him for a while and he knows i am level headed.
    so anyway.. there is actually this product synaptol and its for add/adhd and its suppose to be natural... i want to stay away from the narcotics so im really excited to try this stuff. !!!!!

    Last edited by mod-anon; 05-14-2007 at 04:14 AM. Reason: peer sharing only

     
    Old 05-10-2007, 12:01 PM   #12
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    Re: im afraid to sleep at night!

    Well I guess these days mental illness is the "in" explanation to all our faults and weaknesses, mainly because it sells pills. I still can't believe chemical imbalance is such an accepted medical diagnosis, especially when there are no biological tests or measures to prove such a medical aka biological illness. I personally believe brain imbalances can occur, but are very rare and most times it's still most likely from external factors.

    For example, why is it that when someone indulges in cocaine and tranquilizers and then ends up with bi-polar symptoms do the doctors not blame the indulgences but rather the person must have been "sick" already and just didn't know it and that's why they got into drugs? Don't drugs themselves create brain damages, yes they know that, yet do not blame drugs for the damages but again a "latent" or unnoticed mental illness. I guess this works for them because they want to sell their legal versions of mood drugs...all clinical research paid for by the drug co's points doctors in that direction.

    I remember that movie about a brilliant but distracted professor from Disney, you know, the Absent Minded Professor. So why are the distracted yet brilliant people "sick" now, when before they were just brilliantly absentminded? I still tend to think although ADD is real, it is not a disease of any kind but rather a different minded person who doesn't fit into the norm of a society which does not allow human error or imperfection anymore.

    Well, that ADD natural supplement sounds promising, I hope it works for you!

     
    Old 05-10-2007, 01:19 PM   #13
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    Re: im afraid to sleep at night!

    Well I don't know about all of that but I can tell you that I have ADD myself and its a severe pain in the ***.

    These are some of my common complaints I listed to my doctor.

    - General lack of motivation and fatigue. I wait until the last minute to do something that I have to and I hate it every step of the way. If given the choice I would choose a physical beating than have to perform certain "boring" duties. Then as the opposite things of interest to me I'll work my *** off and wont quit. Otherwise I'm perfectly content to sit in a chair with a soda and stare at the TV all day and do nothing and not complain one bit I'm bored, or I need to get up off the couch and do something, or I'm getting cabin fever. Makes no difference to me I'll sit there forever... unless something interests me.

    - Lack of focus and a wandering mind. When I look at something to read its like I'm looking at it with pereipheral (sp) vision. Like if someone ran up beside you you can see them from the side of of your eyes but you cant see detail. For instance you know a man ran by you but what color was his hair ? ... no clue. This happens when I read all the time, Ill read something 5 times over and retain none of it no matter how hard I force myself. Whats an even bigger complaint is when somone talks to me Ill just zone out completely and uncrontrolably ALL the time. Ill even do this when I'm in a store, I can walk halfway through the store and come to and be like "what the hell am I doing here ?" I have to force myself to concentrate on simple everyday tasks and it usually doesn't work, or at least not very long.

    - memory problems. I am near retarded sometimes with trying to remember where I put my keys, phone numbers, simple directions. I mean I'm BAD... I can't remember anything. Its in one ear and out the other. Its like my mind is out of phase with my body and senses and very little gets through.


    suppliments do nothing for me... absolutely nothing. the only natural thing that immediately fixes this right up is adrenaline, even in the smallest amounts due to something of my interest perking me up for some sort of competition, being scared or worried of something, trying to meet some sort of time deadline. Those snap me right out of it, but as soon as I calm down it starts all over again.

    Now I'm on adderoll. I think my dosage needs increased or I need to switch meds. Ive been on meds with ephedrine in them and they increased focus for me. The adderoll does it somewhat but no where near where I need to be. It worked alot better the first couple of days I took it but now its smoothing out. However my motivation and energy levels are stablized and smoothed. I'm much more agreeable to do the things I dont want but have to do completely on my own with no problems. So at least I gained that from the adderoll. So medication does definately do something to remedy this.

     
    Old 05-11-2007, 01:23 AM   #14
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    Exclamation Re: im afraid to sleep at night!

    i just wanted to say to JasonFMX: You hit the nail RIGHT on the head! I am exactly the same way! I thought I was retarded or something.
    The sad thing is when I learn the way I like to learn (visual notes/ or 1 on 1 tutor) I R E A L L Y excel at whatever it is i'm doing.

    Lately if I find the right dose of Adderall I am like a genius. I can hyperfocus on ONE subject.

    I tested myself once to see if the meds were working... had a math test without the adderall. I sat there tapping my toes, counting the ceiling tiles...next thing i know TIMES UP!

    I retake it on my meds (also just me and teacher in room = silence) and I ace the test. My handwriting is actually very noticeably more consistent and legible.

    OF course there are the side effects. Too little and i'm unmotivated scatter-brained man. Too much and I can't sleep (3:17am right now) and my Obsessive Compulsive thoughts and habits become exacerbated by the stimulant. I start cleaning like Danny Tanner from fullhouse.

    [removed]

    -Eazzzzy E

    Last edited by mod-anon; 05-11-2007 at 05:38 AM.

     
    Old 05-11-2007, 12:10 PM   #15
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    Re: im afraid to sleep at night!

    I think I might ask my doctor to put me on either ritalin.... or maybe try a different adjustment or scheduling with the adderoll.

    Its funny, last night I was experiencing alot of anxiety. I assume it was from the stimulant wearing off. I have had a few things to worry about lately but I don't think that was all of what the anxiety was from becuase I've notice around the same times everyday I get a higher feeling of anxiety for several hours... boy is that uncomfortable.

    So i took one of my pills and cut it in half and took it. I remember sitting down and i was so calmed and relaxed it felt like a soothing liquid was just running through my body for about an hour. Don't knwo what that was. But when it wore off there was no anxiety. Im wandering if not only do i not have the right dose but if it wears off too quickly ? i know adderoll is suppose to gradually bring you down as opposed to ritalin. Guess Ill just have to test them and find out.

     
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