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tripleair 09-15-2005 05:20 PM

Square one
My story: I am a successful mangager at a financial company. A coworker of mine has had vicodin prescription plus 10 other prescriptions for various meds for years. She started giving me a few for fun a couple of years ago. That led to me "buying" her entire batch of 60 each month. Then, I found the online stores who look the other way. I'm up to 210 pills a month and still just barely make without running out month to month. I just got cut off from one online store that provides me my NORCO 10/350 today. I feel this is a sign to do something. I'll have 90 less pills this month. But my coworker is just so easy to do business with. I'm a textbook addictive personality and just don't know how I'm going to be able to walk in the office and say no although I want to stop. It is not her fault, it is mine. Does anyone have any advice as to how I can set the groundrules.......also, if I go from 8 pills to 7 down to 6 etc, is there a formula to how I can taper down? What is the best way to go from 8 or 9 pills a day down to one and then stop? Is this a good approach? Will the withdrawels be any less painful or at least shorter if I taper down? I'm tempted to tell my Dr. to get help. But I don't want this going down in my permanent medical record either. I'm just sure that this will cause my health insurance to go up and/or if I ever have to get insurance in the future, have a prexisting condition marked in my records that will prevent me from being insured. Is this true? Any help would be appreciated. This is my first post.

TJOB3 09-15-2005 07:22 PM

Re: Square one
This is TJOB3 fiance and he just made his first post today, I was in your situation about 2 years ago, and I did try to titrate down but it takes a lot of self control, I was lucky enough to give my pills to a friend that I went and stayed with, who was not an addict and told her DO NOT GIVE THEM TO ME NO MATTER WHAT, after a day, I went and found NA, it worked for me,it is not for all,everyone is so different, I do understand your insurance concern,as I am in the medical field and they do choose to frown upon people like us, but we are out there, addiction has no rules, you should see if you have some type of mental health benefits and they cover substace abuse options and they are kept very private, you have to do whats best for you, as of last pm we made a descion to give up this horrible addiction and what i can tell you is you will have the best feeling of freedom, and I promise it is worth,just dont USE, NO MATTER WHAT, when you get this kicked,good luck one day at a time, or at this stage in the game its more like 5 min at a time,feel free to write and post on our message, we need all the support we can get

100%clean 09-15-2005 08:08 PM

Re: Square one
Hi There,
I was taking 12 Norco a day for about two years straight. I was so sick and tired of it I just stopped cold turkey. No meetings, no treatment, no rehab. I had enough and was ready to accept all the aweful symtoms of Opiate withdrawal. The first few days I felt like my best friend had died and I was treading water. As bad as those first few days were I still had to go to work and run my business. However,from the moment I stopped I did not crave the drug, because I knew that was got me to this dreadful point in my life anyway.
You must get to the point were you are sick and tired of being sick and tired.

Tappering off is very difficult for an addict to do. I tried a number of times and just kept eating the pills faster and faster.

Here is my suggestion. Stop cold turkey. Tell all your drug sources not to supply you with pills anymore. You must close that door so that you are not tempted to go back to these people. For me I had a family member call my "Doctor Feel Good" to tell him what I was going through.
I am now clean 60 days and feel 100% better about life and my future.

You can do it if you really want to stop. Nothing that is easy, is worthwhile!

wut2do 09-15-2005 09:12 PM

Re: Square one
YAY!!! I am so happy for you. lol..dont really know what else to say...just wanted to say good for you

TJOB3 09-15-2005 09:25 PM

Re: Square one
100%clean, thank you for your post, sorry to butt in on square ones post but i came back to read and you told me just what i needed to hear. I have detoxed before, however me and my fiance are getting ready to do it again now and the fear of the unknkwn for him is relentless, he has never detox off opiates and this will be my second time, you really said what he needed to read, detox is different for everyone and congrats on your 60 days, its nice to hear from someone like you, someone who has not forgot what day 1 is like,keep up the work,and dont use.......NO MATTER WHAT, If yo uhave any more encouraging words his message name is TJOB3.............WE WILL NEED THEM ALL WEEK

tripleair 09-16-2005 10:52 AM

Re: Square one
Wow everybody! I'm so thankful I found this place. I woke up this morning thinking that it was too early to have got a response and then I come here to find 4! For those of you who are full support and I will be there soon. The idea of telling my sources it is over is a good one, but at this point, I'm just not ready. It is crazy to think I have to plan for down time now to kick this thing. I never thought I would ever be in a position like this in life. It is so important to know others are also in the same boat. Thanks so much for the advice about psychology services. I hadn't thought about that and I do have someone to go to to via my health plan. I'm making that appointment today. 5 minutes at a time, right? All my best to all of you.

TJOB3 09-16-2005 04:34 PM

Re: Square one
Good for you square one, its TJOB3 fiance again, he started his detox this am and I am titrating down until Monday, and then I will go cold turkey, dont think the house can handle both of us at once, you sound good from your post, TJ is in the bed, with the yawns and the chills and he just keeps c/o being bored, he has agreed to go to an NA meeting this PM, that is what helped me out a bit the first time I did this, I am also glad I found this place its nice to know there is someone else out there who wants the same things as us. I am glad you took my advice regarding your health plan, I am in the medical field and keep in mind, all that stuff is very highly confidenal, so dont worry about most as much as you want, this will ve a long pm for me and when tj wakes up I am going to have him read your post, anything t o get thru to the next minute.....dont worry about giving up your sources, that will come,just worry about what you can do for today......CHRISTINE :)

tripleair 09-16-2005 04:51 PM

Re: Square one
You go Christine! It is nice to have found a friend so quickly here. I think that advice about you both not starting CT is a good idea. Combining professional therapy via NA with support from loved ones AND a willingness to quit equals a fantanstic start. I called my therapist today and although he was not there, I did leave a message to schedule an appointment. So, I did what I said I would do. All my best energy to you and your boyfriend. Take care.
Square One....

henrysintrouble 09-16-2005 06:44 PM

Re: Square one
Been there done that with the titrate. Its ALOT tougher than quitting cold turkey. Think about it...if we had self control, we probably wouldnt be taking anything to begin with. It has worked for me before, but you cannot do it for long. Be completely ready and stick to a really really short time table. I've got plans for the same thing in a few weeks after my honeymoon. Good luck and all the best.....

tripleair 09-19-2005 05:38 PM

Re: Square one
Hey Henry. Thanks and I'll take the advise. I'm planning on going CT in a couple of weekends. I posted something on your other thread about that before I read this. Since you have done it before, it might have been old news. But I totally relate to your situation. I hope you can find the right time to go CT after your honeymoon!

BeginAgain 09-19-2005 05:52 PM

Re: Square one
My advice - just go cold turkey. Find a doc like an addictionologist that can help you and just STOP. I tried to taper for over 6 months and kept eating them like candy. I feared the worst with the cold turkey but it was easier than the taper. Advil helps the body aches, multi vitamins, Vitamin B supplements and a very short course of valium - maybe a day or two to help with sleep. That's how I did it. I am already sleeping through the night without medication and today at 84 hours clean - I fell pretty normal. Slight leg aches left & slight headache - but it's tolerable.
You must be sick and tired of being sick and tired - you must really want it and you must be willing to go to any legnths to stay clean. That means being willing to tell your friend to stop giving them to you - period!!
Good luck!! God bless and one final word - Insanity is repeating the same thing over and over and expecting different results.

tripleair 09-19-2005 06:02 PM

Re: Square one
begin again....yes I agree. After reading more and more posts, it is clear that I've just go to go CT. But I'd rather go ct off of 1 or 2 a day than 8. I did this once on a trip to africa and it worked. However, I detoxed in the 28 hour plane ride home. (Not fun!!!!) And of course, dumb dumb had a nice package waiting in the mail as soon as he got home. I'm so glad you made the decision to do it. I've made my reservations to a special hotspring retreat to go CT. I've been going there for years and I'm sure the hotsprings will help a lot! Thanks for caring. Right on for kicking!!!

bent_halo 09-19-2005 11:03 PM

Re: Square one
Your hot springs trip sounds like a great Idea, soaking in a hot tub does wonders for the restless legs and crawling skin, also you might want to look up the detox recipe, I will try and find it and bump it up for you, the vitamins do work even if you don't have the benzo's, just remember, the first 5-6 days are the worst, but it does get better....

Good luck to you, you are in my prayers...

Angel :angel:

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