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  • I'm SO TIRED of being addicted!



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    Old 01-13-2006, 04:11 PM   #46
    halo1
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    Re: I'm SO TIRED of being addicted!

    hi paul, i didn't read your entire thread before chiming in.
    CONGRATS!!!!!!!! one month clean is quite an accomplishment. hope you have many more months of happy, healthy living.

     
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    Old 01-13-2006, 05:35 PM   #47
    barbaric_yawp
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    Re: I'm SO TIRED of being addicted!

    Welcome! Keep up the good work--good point about taking it four hours at a time. One usually thinks to take a day at a time, but when you are going through wd's, you go through a time warp...;-)

     
    Old 01-13-2006, 06:03 PM   #48
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    Re: I'm SO TIRED of being addicted!

    hi paul,my daughter is an addict and would give my all for her to be one month clean,well done you A++,sad,mum

     
    Old 01-13-2006, 11:38 PM   #49
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    Re: I'm SO TIRED of being addicted!

    This Message is for Sad Mum.

    I have spent some time reading your thread "Help me help my daughter" and I want you to know that first of all, whether you realize it or not your story has reached and touched more lives than you can possibly imagine, including me.

    It is one thing to be an addict, it is quite another to be the helpless parent of an addict and feel completely powerless. I'm sure that you have guilted yourself to the point that even you feel that you are to blame. And if you haven't then good for you, because you are definately not to blame. Let me say that one more time - YOU ARE NOT TO BLAME!

    Also from what I've read, you have been empowered by some very wise advise from people on this very board on how to deal with your daughters addiction and behavior. And I can tell from your posts that you are drawing and gaining strength from a very large support group that is behind you 100%. You could not be in a better place for information, direction, support and guidance than right here.

    I Applaud you for not giving the money to your daughter for her to buy more drugs. You were her mother before she started the drugs and you will still be her mother no matter how long it takes for her to get off of them, and every time she comes and asks for money it gives you an opportunity to be her mother by doing what is best for her:

    If she needs money for food - you feed her.
    If she needs money to clean clothes - you clean them.
    If she needs money to go somewhere - you take her.
    If she needs a roof over her head - give her a bed

    I know this all sounds very basic, but the truth of the matter is that as a parent myself I would lay down and die in order to save one of my children. I think any parent that loves their children would do the same. The same is true when they are sick - we just want them to be well or at least feel better. That's when parents are very vulnerable when their child comes to the door and looks so pitiful and strungout and begs for a few dollars, they know that they will get it. This is NOT the flu or a cold so don't feel guilty not giving it to them, it's just like you were handing them the drugs yourself.

    The problem with your daughter is that she has been changed by the drugs that she is taking. She will say and do things that will absolutely make you think she has lost her mind, but all it really is, is that her mind is set on getting the drugs, it's what her whole life revolves arounds. And until she sees, realizes and accepts what they are doing to her life she will stay dependent.

    But by staying strong and standing your ground and going to a counselor and coming here to post - you have created your own army to support you and to help her fight her fight when she is ready.

    I debated about adding this last part, but I will just because I feel that the situation is pretty desperate. I had some friends of mine that live in Nashville, TN and they had a 17 year old son last year that was doing meth, crack, coke, weed and Oxycontin. He was a very messed up little boy. His parents had found him almost dead twice, once in the front yard of their house and the other in his car from an attempted suicide. After a couple of years of this they did not know what to do. So his Father & Mother put him in the car one day and drove him to their insurance agents office. The boy just knew that his father was probably going to drop him from their policy and take away his car, but, that's not even close to what actually happened.

    The Mother and Father walked their boy back to the agents office and there were papers on his desks and everybody was being real quiet. The agent asked how he could help and The Father spoke up and said that they needed to take out a $50,000 Life insurance policy with accidental death for their son. The boy just sat in his chair staring. As the agent started writing it up the Father kept asking if it would cover certain drug related deaths and the agent answered his questions. Well pretty soon that was it.

    The parents never discussed this with their boy after that day and I don't know if they had meant for it to have such an impact. The Father just wanted to make sure that there would be enough money to bury thier son and pay off any debts that he might owe.

    But within two months that boy was completely clean. And it was all because he was forced to see where he was going to end up if he didn't change.

    Sad Mum, My heart and soul go out to you and your daughter. No family should ever have to experience such heartache. I will continue to watch and read and will pray for a happy speedy recovery for you both.

    Paul

     
    Old 01-14-2006, 04:30 PM   #50
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    Re: I'm SO TIRED of being addicted!

    Thanks halo and b.y. for the words of support. Isn't it amazing that we can think our own live's are messed up until we run into somebody that worse off than we are? Although I have never spoken to any of you, it's amazing how cliose and connected I feel.

    Paul

     
    Old 01-21-2006, 10:16 PM   #51
    Paul2005
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    Re: I'm SO TIRED of being addicted!

    Hey CJ,

    If you are still hanging in there, check in and let us know how you're doing? Remember, you came here for support, and the last time I checked these boards nobody was charging anything for support and advise so keep on posting. If anybody knows if she is on another board now, please let me know.

    Paul

     
    Old 01-22-2006, 12:07 AM   #52
    sad,mum
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    Re: I'm SO TIRED of being addicted!

    hi,paul how are you give me an update,sad,mum

     
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