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  • Day 4 no Xanax! Can't believe I'm finally here!



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    Old 12-17-2006, 07:37 AM   #1
    zosolizard
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    Day 4 no Xanax! Can't believe I'm finally here!

    I did it, I finally took the leap after tapering for 2 months - I took my last little crumb of Xanax on Wednesday.

    I feel like crap, I will admit. Bad headaches, nausea, stomach pain, dizziness, anxiety, shooting pains, feeling completely spacey, etc

    BUT - I'm officially CLEAN !! WHOOOOO!!! I never thought this day would come.

    When I first started tapering, I remember coming here & you guys said "just stick with it, you will feel so good about yourself when you are done". I knew you were right, and you guys helped me through it all. So I want to say thanks from the bottom of my heart.


     
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    Old 12-17-2006, 08:29 AM   #2
    reachout
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    Re: Day 4 no Xanax! Can't believe I'm finally here!

    What a wonderful victory for you! Way to go.

    Your success will help others stick to their goals.

    You are an inspiration!! THANK YOU

     
    Old 12-17-2006, 03:29 PM   #3
    zosolizard
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    Re: Day 4 no Xanax! Can't believe I'm finally here!

    Reach, thanks so much! I really do hope I can help others. The road looks so long & painful - and it seems like it will never end, but as you keep going, you know eventually you will reach the end. Heck, even today I think "ugh am I ever going to feel better"? And I know I will, eventually. I never want to go through this again, that's what keeps me going.

     
    Old 12-17-2006, 03:47 PM   #4
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    Re: Day 4 no Xanax! Can't believe I'm finally here!

    [FONT="Garamond"] it will get better just scream if you want ,one day i ran out i did,nt know what i was in for i call my dr. every day for a week.i,m ok now i neverrr[want to take are any other med. unless i know before hand .what side effects are , you keep on going /FONT]
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    Old 12-17-2006, 03:48 PM   #5
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    Re: Day 4 no Xanax! Can't believe I'm finally here!

    [FONT="Garamond"] it will get better just scream if you want ,one day i ran out i did,nt know what i was in for i call my dr. every day for a week.i,m ok now i neverrr[want to take are any other med. unless i know before hand .what side effects are , you keep on going /FONT]
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    Last edited by pidypat; 12-17-2006 at 03:53 PM. Reason: duplicate

     
    Old 12-17-2006, 03:48 PM   #6
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    Re: Day 4 no Xanax! Can't believe I'm finally here!

    [FONT="Garamond"] it will get better just scream if you want ,one day i ran out i did,nt know what i was in for i call my dr. every day for a week.i,m ok now i neverrr[want to take are any other med. unless i know before hand .what side effects are , you keep on going /FONT]
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    Old 12-17-2006, 03:58 PM   #7
    zosolizard
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    Re: Day 4 no Xanax! Can't believe I'm finally here!

    Ohh boy that had to be so rough! Honestly I didn't know how bad Xanax was either, I've never really taken any RX drugs before... and the doctor was so willing to give me lots & lots. Even to this day, she doubts me when I say I am physically addicted! Oh well.... at least I got smart! Thanks for the encouragement.

     
    Old 12-17-2006, 07:28 PM   #8
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    Re: Day 4 no Xanax! Can't believe I'm finally here!

    Hi Zosolizard

    I had some questions. I am tapering off oxycodone right now. When I am done with this, I have to tackle xanax.

    I know that xanax MUST be a taper because of seizures and stuff. This is what I don't understand, though:

    If you went thru a taper, why is the end so hard?

    I ask for 2 reasons. I want someone to tell me what the end of this oxycodone taper is truly gonna be like. And I am trying to understand why your symptoms are so bad now. Did you have a tough time throughout the entire taper?

    This oxycodone taper is like torture. I know xanax will be even tougher. Just looking for some imput, some hope I can do all this without totally losing my mind (and that is truly how I feel much of the time).

    Any insight?

    And once again, much praise for your remarkable accomplishment.
    Reach

     
    Old 12-18-2006, 06:58 AM   #9
    zosolizard
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    Re: Day 4 no Xanax! Can't believe I'm finally here!

    Quote:
    Originally Posted by reachout
    Hi Zosolizard

    I had some questions. I am tapering off oxycodone right now. When I am done with this, I have to tackle xanax.

    I know that xanax MUST be a taper because of seizures and stuff. This is what I don't understand, though:

    If you went thru a taper, why is the end so hard?

    I ask for 2 reasons. I want someone to tell me what the end of this oxycodone taper is truly gonna be like. And I am trying to understand why your symptoms are so bad now. Did you have a tough time throughout the entire taper?

    This oxycodone taper is like torture. I know xanax will be even tougher. Just looking for some imput, some hope I can do all this without totally losing my mind (and that is truly how I feel much of the time).

    Any insight?

    And once again, much praise for your remarkable accomplishment.
    Reach
    Hi Reach,

    Well, let's see, I'll do my best to help you out!

    I can't speak to the Oxycodone taper or what it will be like at the end, but I can surely speak to Xanax. Not sure if one is easier than the other - but one thing I have read about Xanax, the wd's can last & last - for months even! That's the scariest part. But I decided that sooner or later, I'll have to deal with it. And there will never be a "good time" to feel like crap, right ?

    I started my taper 2 months ago. The intensity of wd's has seemed to come & go. I'd have days where I didn't feel too bad - just a bit anxious. Then I'd come back to feeling ill again (the stomach probs, headache, sweats).

    Through this all, I have made it to work every day, so its tolerable. I always feel worse at night for some reason - probably because that was when I'd take the bulk of my Xanax. I used to basically suffer most of the day, taking just enough to keep from being sick.

    I have a heart arrythmia as well.. so I'm dealing with the stress & anxiety of that at the same time. So that is probably making everything a lot worse. I started a new heart med last week & I think that has made me much dizzier - and maybe some of the other things I'm feeling are from that as well. Plus my thyroid disease doesn't help!!

    Here's the best advice I can give: Don't be afraid. You are already on the road, which is so commendable. You have proven that you are strong enough!

    Honestly - this is WORTH IT. Cuz I'm going to be free. Heck, I already am!!!

    Again, remember that there will never be a good time to feel like crap. So - might as well just get it over with!!!

    Big hugs to you, please stick it out. I'll try to help & encourage you any way I can. I try to logon here as often as possible, but some days I just can't.

    Take care, good luck, and stay STRONG! YOU CAN DO IT. IT IS WORTH IT. YOU ARE WORTH IT.

     
    Old 12-18-2006, 08:13 AM   #10
    reachout
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    Re: Day 4 no Xanax! Can't believe I'm finally here!

    Yo Zoso

    I raed your words three times to let it all really register. Thanks for your answers and encouragement.

    I, too, am on heart meds as I had a heart attack 2 years ago. One is a med to slow my heart down. I truly believe it contributed to my exhaustion and depression. I was also on a statin for cholesterol and sugar medication. I have been taken off the statin and sugar med because the doctor felt they were contributing factors. Eventually, I will have to go back on them.

    I realize, though, that the opiates and xanax are the biggest depressants and that is why I am on a plan to get off of them.

    Geeze, it is tough. My body and mind hurt, but even more, my soul hurts. I know that eventually, with God's help, I will get thru this. I want the end to be here so badly. So badly.

    God bless you for caring for a cyber stranger. Your conviction is helping to strength mine.

    Love and hugs

     
    Old 12-18-2006, 09:05 AM   #11
    zosolizard
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    Re: Day 4 no Xanax! Can't believe I'm finally here!

    Quote:
    Originally Posted by reachout
    Yo Zoso

    I raed your words three times to let it all really register. Thanks for your answers and encouragement.

    I, too, am on heart meds as I had a heart attack 2 years ago. One is a med to slow my heart down. I truly believe it contributed to my exhaustion and depression. I was also on a statin for cholesterol and sugar medication. I have been taken off the statin and sugar med because the doctor felt they were contributing factors. Eventually, I will have to go back on them.

    I realize, though, that the opiates and xanax are the biggest depressants and that is why I am on a plan to get off of them.

    Geeze, it is tough. My body and mind hurt, but even more, my soul hurts. I know that eventually, with God's help, I will get thru this. I want the end to be here so badly. So badly.

    God bless you for caring for a cyber stranger. Your conviction is helping to strength mine.

    Love and hugs
    Wow, we have more in common than we originally thought, huh ?

    Oy vey, not only do we have to deal with these stupid drugs, we have serious health conditions to contend with. Makes it even harder. I guess that's Gods will for whatever reason - our chance to prove how strong we are I guess.

    I know what you mean about feeling depressed, and how the mind, body, and the soul all hurt. I have nights where I just don't know how I'm going to get through it all. Especially every night I have chest pains, and my heart just beats all crazy & jumps around & I think I'm going to die right there - and I can't just pop a Xanax to deal with it now. That's how I got hooked in the first place.

    I'm guessing you are taking some form of Beta Blocker or similar drug? That's what I'm taking, and they can cause depression - along with the awful fatigue. My doctor warned me to keep an eye on that.

    Sometimes I'm not sure what is withdrawal from Xanax, and what is from the heart med!

    I do notice that my head feels clearer at times these days... and I have some moments of hope. I just hang on to the notion that these times will occur more & more often. And that I'll feel GOOD someday. I've gotta believe in that.

    I see a therapist weekly right now - it's great to have a whole hour to just talk, say whatever you want, and they have no choice but to listen

    I also keep a journal nearby at all times - I have a date to write in it every Friday night no matter what, as well as anytime I'm having a really rough moment.

    Those are two things that help me out a little bit.

    Sorry I just wrote a novel, LOL.

    Take care & I hope you have a good day!

     
    Old 12-19-2006, 02:18 PM   #12
    Neverforget
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    Re: Day 4 no Xanax! Can't believe I'm finally here!

    Wow! I still remember sitting in my recliner and seeing your message on my laptop when you first posted about wanting to quit. Look at how far you've come Zoso! That is such great news. And the fact that you stuck to it is such an inspiration - others will now take strength from you and your story. Congratulations and enjoy your Xanaxless Christmas and an addiction free New Year!

     
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