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    Old 03-22-2007, 07:01 PM   #1
    gracie32
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    Angry Can't find Suboxone Dr!!!!

    I spent the day trying to find a doctor to see for suboxone. Unfortunatly, where I live there isn't a lot of good treatment programs, let alone private docs to help with this. I went on the suboxone site to find them and the ones on the list were no longer practicing except for the one who is is part of a faciity that may or may not prescribe it based on a patient to patient basis, the peole I spoke with that work with him, (took 7 different #'s to get no where) couldn't tell me how he does things! So I gave my info and I'm supposed to get a call back. In the meantme, I printed up a list of a city 2 hours away that seems to have a good amount of docs who prescribe it. I just wish I didn't have to go that far, it's going to be so dificult. I'm determined to do this, I want it so bad. Hearing about the people on this site that have used it have made me want to try it even more. The thought of feeling normal and clear headed and no horriable w/d's is very appealing. That's the hardest part of this, like most here, my desire to quit is strong, but my will power for weaning off is not, and I do not have the time to be sick. Not to mention the feeling of w/d is so bad all I do is plot how to get more meds just to make it stop. I'm actually suprized I haven't overdosed myself on sleeping pills and muscle relaxors in that 1st 48 hrs of it trying to just sleep through it. Well, I'm done complaining, sorry! Thank you all for you amazing info and advice, I've been reading all the posts so much the past few days, it makes me feel like i'm not in this alone anymore. So many things that I thought only I could know or go through are written here. Things other people would never understand. So thank you. And by the way, Happy Birthday and congrats on your 10 days arg49ermom!

     
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    Old 03-22-2007, 07:56 PM   #2
    arg49ermom
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    Re: Can't find Suboxone Dr!!!!

    I am so sorry Gracie that there's not a sub doctor closer to you. Maybe a drive 2 hours away wouldn't be all that. If you think about it... if you were out of pills and the closest ones were 2 hours away would you do it? (I know I would have)!! Then maybe a 2 hour drive to feel normal and get back on track isn't all that bad. I'm trying real hard to be positive!! I hope and pray that you find the help you need. Big Hugs to you! Thanks for the bday wishes!! I'm 34 today.. Yikes!!!!!!!!!

     
    Old 03-22-2007, 08:14 PM   #3
    gracie32
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    Re: Can't find Suboxone Dr!!!!

    Hey I'm only 2 years behind you baby! Thank you for pointing out the positive side, and your absolutly right, I would drive for the pills w/out a 2nd thought. I'm just feeling so guilty as far as my family goes, I've put them through so much. I hate having to put my husband out once again because of my problem. Hopefully I will find a doc, and if it's 2 hrs away, that's a day he has to stay home from work, and I don't know how many days a week I'll be required to go, if it's more than one a week, there's no way. I don't have anyone to watch the kids, it's just us, so he has to if I'm not here, and I certainly can't take them. I guess I'll wait to freak out until after I hear back from the dr here in town and talk to the ones out of town to get more info. Who knows, it make work out easier than I think! Baby steps right?

     
    Old 03-23-2007, 08:23 AM   #4
    hopeintn
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    Re: Can't find Suboxone Dr!!!!

    Gracie,

    Congrats on your decision to quit!! That is awesome!! I am not familiar with sub and I was curious as to "why" you think you need it? Have you tried going c/t before? I am not judging you in any way, just trying to help....I ended up going c/t because there really wasn't any other option for me....It has been very difficult, but I am now on day 25 clean and life is wonderful!! I hope this gives you some hope and if you need anything, please let me know...

    I know how it is with kids, I have 3 myself (twins that are 4, and a son that will be 9 in April) they can be so difficult sometimes, but I "feel" so much better being able to be there for them....

    Best wishes to you in the recovery option you choose....((hugs)) it will get better soon!!

    -Brandi

     
    Old 03-23-2007, 03:16 PM   #5
    gracie32
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    Re: Can't find Suboxone Dr!!!!

    Brandi,

    First, congrats on your 25 days, keep strong! 2nd, totally valid question. I have had a problem with pain meds for 6 years. Over those 6 years I've tried c/t many times, obviously to no success. This time I'm more serious than ever, I've been doing research this week trying to find a way for me to get some help. I have no will power to wean myself off, I don't have the time to or the strength to go c/t, and I can't afford or take the time for inpatient detox. I also am the mom of 3, a 7yr old, 4 1/2, and 15mths. My husband works for himself and can't stay home to watch them more than a day. We have no other family or friends that can do it either. I'm a bit of a "supermom" doing everything around the house, so I just can't be sick. My c/t involves still doing the laundry, cooking dinner, making sure my son has lunch and a prepared bookbag for school the next day, etc. I just can't do it like that again. So in my research I discovered this drug, suboxone. It doesn't give you a high like methadone, so you don't get addicted right off and can be trusted with a weeks supply so you don't have to go in to an office on a daily basis. It eliminates w'd's and from what I hear after a few sleepy feeling days your totally functional and clear headed. And it gets rid of the cravings as well as make you sick if you take narcotics while on it. Ths seems like my best chance of recovery. So, thats my explaination, I've asked around here and everything I've heard so far is good. I hope I can find a dr and get started soon! Please feel free to ask me anything in the future,I don't mind at all, keeps me focused and the people here are really all I've got to share this stuff with! Take care, and again congrats, hope to join you soon!

     
    Old 03-23-2007, 06:49 PM   #6
    hopeintn
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    Re: Can't find Suboxone Dr!!!!

    Gracie,

    Thank you for taking the time to "explain" to me how the sub works, I know that I have seen several people mention it, but I never really knew what it did...Like I said in my earlier post, the most important thing is that you WANT to quit and that in itself is wonderful!!! :hugs: It's hard sometimes for us addicts to realize that we DO have a problem....Getting clean is the next step and by NO means is it easy, but do-able....

    I was on hydrocodone for 2 years, every single day, I absolutely could NOT function w/o it and I knew the whole time what I was doing was wrong, but I couldn't stop myself as I am sure you can relate...It is such an evil thing!!

    So your husband does know about this, right? Is he being supportive of you? I sure hope so, b/c I can honestly tell you if it weren't for my husband being there for me, I don't think I would have made it this far....He is there for me to talk to and listen (well, I think he does, but you know how men are LOL) I also attend NA meetings at least once a week....I work full time and my husband is a stay at home dad, then when I get home from work he goes to school at night 4 days a week....So, I can relate to you on the whole kids thinig...It can be SO overwhelming, but one thing I try to remember is the BEST thing I can give my kids, is their mom back!!!! They deserve it!!

    I will be thinking of you hun and wishing you the best in your recovery....

    HUGS!!!

    Last edited by moderator2; 03-24-2007 at 06:13 AM.

     
    Old 03-23-2007, 08:13 PM   #7
    gracie32
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    Wink Re: Can't find Suboxone Dr!!!!

    Thank you for your good wishes. I can use all I can get! My husband is aware of my problem and supportive, as much as he can be. He's a strong guy who can't wrap his brain around how a drug could control a person. But he loves me and stands by me. It's good to be able to come here too, I'm so glad I found this place. Knowing there's other people who know what I'm going throgh is a huge thing for me. I've never opened up to anyone one about all this. Not even my husband knows everything about how this has gotten ahold of me and controled me. The things we all have gone through are tremendous, and to be able to freely talk about it makes all the difference in getting past it. Many hugs and good thoughts your way!

     
    Old 03-23-2007, 10:50 PM   #8
    toughtime
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    Cool Re: Can't find Suboxone Dr!!!!

    Hi everyone!

    You old-timers will remember me. I've been coming to these boards for years. Quit cold turkey for the first time a year ago Jan. It lasted a few weeks. Over the past year I've probably quit 4 or 5 times. I just can't stay quit. Like you Grace, I've been doing pain pills for probably 6 years. Started with back problems but more of a desire to get high. I was up to 30 norcos a day at my highest and I'm probably at 15 a day now. Well, I've been following Arg49er's post for a while about the sub. I am a single mom with no sick days left from work. I quit cold turkey last week and almost lost my job b/c I can't miss anymore. Being forced to go back to work got me back on the pills. It's hard enough to make dinners and bathe my daughter and get her to bed and to school without pills (while going thru withdrawals I mean) but to do all of that and go to a job I hate and function?!? I just can't handle that during withdrawals. I've "quit" so many times this last year I've used all of my sick time and personal time. So I made the move to sub. Your posts gave me the courage I needed and I made an appointment with a suboxone doctor for Monday April 2! I am so excited. And scared. This doc won't tell me the cost. It's between $94 and $300?? That's a stretch for me but if I don't do this I would have to come up with $150+ to get a new bottle from an OP so I am going to use the money for the sub. Does anyone know how much sub costs if you don't have insurance, or if Aetna insurance covers it? I'd rather self pay in a way so it's not on my permanent insurnace record.

    It's weird b/c I actually got hydros from this doc years ago. He was one of my rotations in my doctor shopping and ironically the last place I had an MRI done. He's new to the sub but close to my home and I think he's new enough where he's not going to make me come in every day like some sub docs. I've called other ones that are adamant that you have to come in every day for a week, then once a week, etc. Anyway, I'm so sick of these drugs controlling me! I try to quit I try to cut back and I can't. I am powerless over my addiction. They are making me so depressed. I think about suicide so much. I won't do it b/c of my wonderful little daughter but i know it's the pills ruining my life in so many ways. I can't wait to get off. I am scared and excited about this. Thanks to all of you for posting your experiences. There's a new website-turntohelp where you can get sub docs too. I've just been hearing radio ads and they are blowing me away. Especially the last line where the mom says that her daughter has her mommy back. That breaks my heart. They just changed the law where a sub doc can have 100 patients instead of 30.

    Grace, keep checking for docs since more are being added to the list a lot. I might even send an email to the sub site and ask if any doctors are close to being certified in your area. If they knew a patient was ready to go it might get a doctor to hurry up and commit. Arg, happy birthday. I too am having a birthday in 2 weeks and I'm gonna be straight for it. I quit on New year's day for a week and had planned on spending the whole new year pill free. I quit smoking too, and was able to stick to that but pills are so much harder. I think sub is going to be the answer to my prayers!

    Debbie

     
    Old 03-25-2007, 01:15 PM   #9
    nicole1975
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    Re: Can't find Suboxone Dr!!!!

    Gracie,

    Hello, I read your post and just wanted to say a few things. #1 I am a mother too and am very proud of you making the decision to decide to quit. I know how it feels to look at your children and you are just filled with guilt. I myself was on pain medication for close to 4 years. It started out as a back injury with 3 herniated discs.... 1st vicoden, then percocet and then oxycontin and percocet one thing led to another and I was superwoman and felt like the energizer bunny. Then I just could not live anymore with the guilt, and looking at my husband and son everynight knowing waht I was doing to my health. My whole point is I thought about subonex too and it was crazy trying to find a doctor around where I live. Then I found one and it was $500.00 for the 1st visit and did not include the medicine! Well, I checked into methadone and researched it for awhile. Yes there is good and bad and that is with any medication. But, I want you to know I have been on methadone for 1 month now and I feel great, clear headed, no high feeling and feel like myself again. This may not be the route you want to go if your not sure. But, I do live with back pain, migraines and other minor pain issues and the methadone seems to help with this and for me I do not feel high. If you get on the pain management board you will read that a lot of people take methadone for chronic pain because it is suppost to not have that high feeling. But, I am no doctor and everyone is different. But, if you should want any other information on getting off want your on now I would be more than happy to chat. Good luck with your journey! I can promise you when you decide to quit it is such a good feeling. It's like the fight is over! No more lies, guilt, worrying about your next fix and the w/d's!! It's just a good feeling.

     
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